2007-10-17 15:10:14 · 24 answers · asked by Plondaranera 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
It sounds like you are going to do it anyway, Because you already asked yourself the question and now you just need affirmation. But why aren't you in love with him anymore? Did he do something very hurtful? (cheat, abuse, etc) or Did you do something hurtful and just want out before he finds out? Do you have children? Is there a way to work things out?
You know?, sometimes when we are very used to living with someone, we don't remember the things that got us together, until that person is gone again, then it might be too late. Re-evaluate your relationship and your reasons for wanting a divorce.
2007-10-17 15:31:54 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
you should seek a divorce and let him be on his way before you find someone you do like and start an affair. you both have the right to be happy and if you're no longer happy with him find someone that will make you happy. just make sure that the love is really gone and its not just a phase because he might not take you back.
2007-10-17 22:19:37 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
No, I think that unless he has cheated on your or physically, or sexually abuses you, you should seek counseling. Does he know how you feel? I am guessing not.
If you could take a moment and think of how your life would be without him and think about the time that you did love him, this is a start.
Try to work this out.
2007-10-17 22:23:30 · answer #3 · answered by Indya M 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Why aren't you in love with him anymore? Wish people would tell why.
I would say this to you. Work out your problems with him, TOGETHER. Don't take the easy way out without working out your problems. Take your vows seriously and don't use them like it is some game!! If you stopped loving him for NO REASON AT ALL, then your husband married the wrong woman!
2007-10-17 22:29:00 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
we cant' expect to be in love all the time with our partners. we may love them but not be in love with them. love is an ebb and flow and always moving. it comes and goes, cyclic. if its gone it can come back just as easily . You could be mistaking lost love for something else that could be in the way.
we can't expect to be in perpetual state of Inloveness which is sensation orientated, and when it goes we think we need to find another person to keep the sensation going.
love is actually hard work to keep going. its never easy and nor should it be.
try some councelling first as divorce is not the solution
2007-10-17 22:28:35 · answer #5 · answered by dot 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
One pair of questions you missed to imform us of? " Do you still love him" as opposed to "being in love with him?"
I ask you those two questions because people often mistake infatuation as love. Don't get me wrong infatuation leads to love, lust, jealousy, booze, suicide, poetry, fistfights, arguments, sex, masterbation, adoption, donations, hunger, nostalgia I could go on. My point is you can be in love with a person and not love said person AND you can also love a person without being in love with said person. So look at it this way can you see yourself no longer married to him? how would that make you feel?
As for seekage of divorce, perhaps first you could try to jumpstart your marriage out of the doldrums (a vacation for starters) with lots of work, before you give up on your marriage...just do not start seeing another man in the until its completely over if it comes to that.
2007-10-17 22:22:21 · answer #6 · answered by John L 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Ask yourself what did you find attractive about him when you first met. Then ask yourself what has changed. If it is something as simple as him growing distant or gaining weight then get over it and find the one you loved. If it is an abuse issue or he cheated on you then look at getting a divorce.
2007-10-17 22:21:41 · answer #7 · answered by The Last Viking 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Love is not only an action.... it is a command, a promise. You said you would love, honor and cherish him, so keep your promise.
When you do anything for him, you are loving him.
* Make him breakfast=you are loving him
* Wash his clothes=you are loving him
* Make him dinner, etc.=you are loving him
* Giving him a kiss=you are loving him.
ALSO... I find it helps when you try to remember what it was like when you FIRST got together. Do things to bring those times back. For instance, mimick the dates you took exactly.
best wishes
2007-10-17 22:17:40 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
first think about what made you fall in love with him in the first place. What has changed since then? how have you changed? how has he changed? do you share the same beliefs? how would the divorce agree with or affect those beliefs? then talk to him about how you feel. adress him, and he should be open to communication. be sure not conflict or confuse your desires with your expectations as well.
2007-10-17 22:21:56 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
One sided love is never any good. But first, ask him how he feels about the marriage. Maybe the two of you can find a way for it to last.
2007-10-17 22:18:05 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋