I'm not a prude but I get upset when it is done behind my back. Either he should be smarter about covering his tracks or include me in the viewing. I have voiced my opinion about how it bothers me so now I want to fight fire with fire and show him how this bothers me and makes me slightly insecure. I want him to feel that for a bit.
2007-10-17 15:03:32 · 28 answers · asked by tina m 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I used to feel like that, but then again, those women are never going to be with him in real life.....and he is paying to get a peek at a fantasy, a trained girl that has no idea who he is......I would let it be unless it becomes an obsession, or the sexual life or sex routine of both of you changes... if any of these happens (and i don't recommend this ) but buy a dildo...preferably a bigger size than his "tool" and lay it around somewhere, not too obvious, where he can see it.....
2007-10-17 15:24:04 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
Look I have the same problem, you are not a prude just a women with feelings. I know you probably give your all to the relationship and feel that it is unfair to get paid back in that manner. No guy will understand and they will post mean comments because they want their wives to allow them to view porn. Don't feel insecure, dress up pretty, look your best and make sure he sees when men look at you in the super market. Then if he gets upset, just say well you look at other people's wives or girlfriends on porn sites and no one is angry at you, LOL.
2007-10-21 12:11:44 · answer #2 · answered by Social Media Sass 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all, just having V.I.P member status is disrespect enough to you. But, you are contradicting yourself with saying it's ok to watch porn and view magazine porn. You have to be stern about your beliefs and approach him with it. Most men think watching porn is ok, it's healthy but when you have a spouse it becomes a problem. Evidently there is something he's not totally getting from you sexually because if he was he wouldn't be online paying to see other women. Confront him about the charges and let him know how you feel. But, be ready for the outcome of it all. Sometimes it's not always good. And others, well he could just use another computer and get another card. Good Luck!
2016-05-23 06:31:07 · answer #3 · answered by tamra 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Alright... heres the deal, I was just recently through the same thing....first of all if they are just porn sites who cares.. if they are adult personals and hes trying to meet someone thats different. Men are different than us...sexually that is. they like to fantasize its really not a big deal. Im sure you have either watched porn alone, or looked at nude men online. It really isnt a big deal. Dont get yourself all upset about it. Hes not cheating my looking at it so relax its just their nature. Would you rather he go out to the bars everynight and flirt with the bartender cut him some slack. Dont think its because you arent good enough or pretty enough dont let your self esteem become and issue. My husband loves porn and never admitted it to me until I caught him looking at it. I laughed because I know he cant have those woman. Let it be a factor in the bedroom for the two of you, it might spark things up some.
2007-10-17 15:34:40 · answer #4 · answered by ~The doctors Wife~ 2 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Instead of fighting, take a look at the bigger picture here. What he's doing is disrespectful. He already KNOWS this upsets you, yet he continues. That speaks volumes about his true feelings for you. That's what you should be concerned about! It is very obvious that he doesn't care about or respect you or your feelings. How OK are you with being married to a guy who doesn't give a rip about you or your feelings?
2007-10-17 18:26:53 · answer #5 · answered by Sondra 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
There are 2 ways to deal with this:
1. Sit down and look at them with him. Make comments (like oh she (or he) is SO hot!! Look at those abs. Those thighs!
Or comment in a positive way about the women, "I would love to cut my hair like that. I was thinking of getting a Brazilian wax like her." Or any other positive comment. Ask him what his favorite sites are, sit in his lap and ask him to show you.
2. Start looking at the guy websites yourself.
Usually the first one will make him feel that it isn't so much fun anymore because it isn't a secret anymore or it is not forbidden.
2007-10-17 15:21:11 · answer #6 · answered by Ken C 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well maybe you could tell him to include you. Pick an choose your battles, hey if he is sitting at HOME and let me emphasize home, be it that is doing in the confides of HOME and not out in public consider yourself lucky! My boyfriend is into it to but let me also say that they don't look at these women as fantasies, they just want the sexual stimilation so they can rub one out..trust me. I have asked my boyfriend, and I was completely honest what his opinion was; was he daydreaming about them etc...and basically he was the act that just turned him on. Trust me when he is not home I catch myself peeking, and believe me try it by yourself you will get a whole other opinion about it....
2007-10-17 15:15:07 · answer #7 · answered by pattiof 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Some guys will look at porn when ever they get a chance. At the risk of sounding like a weirdo; maybe you should allow yourself to be found by him looking at porn and looking very sexy. wink wink Maybe this will turn him on well enough to start making it a couples activity! Or...you could purchase a 'key-logger' for the computer; this will enable you to track his every key stroke, password and porn sites he visits. Perhaps you could use the info to mess with his head or... be found by him at his fav porn site
2007-10-17 17:00:51 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he is viewing the sites at times that you have turned him down for sex, or when he knows you aren't in the mood, why let it bother you? Revenge is never good, and only leads to larger problems. Sit him down and calmly and rationally explain your insecurities, don't harp on him about it, or be confrontational, accusatory, and argumentative about it.
2007-10-17 16:26:25 · answer #9 · answered by littlevivi 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
there is no reason to get back at him and it will casue more problems if you do...it is nothing personal towards you or how he feels about you and is probably something he doesnt want to have you join in, partially because it is strange to have your wife view porn with you, and he may be embarrased by it as well. just sit him down, tell him you know that he looks at it sometimes and explain how it makes you feel. dont just yell at him, sit down and have a real discussion about it. think about exactly what you want to say before you say it and give him a chance to respond to you. i truely believe pretty much any problem can be resolved when there is proper ommunication, especially when cooler heads prevail. good luck
2007-10-17 15:17:15 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋