I screwed a lot of things up in the course of my relationship, which has caused my partner to resent me. (Although I make amends, I don't handle his initial "Hey, you screwed up" complaints very well...and I can't seem to learn to stop making mistakes.)
His resentful behavior and treatment of me makes me resent him in return. It's like because I've admitted that everything is my fault, I'm not allowed to argue anymore when he's being unfair, overreacting, or attacking. On top of that, I hate feeling like a bad person and perpetually rejected.
We both want to make the relationship work (together for almost two years) but we don't know how to stop feeling sad, angry, and bitter.
How can we overcome this?
Do you think we can?
2007-10-17 13:17:04 · 5 answers · asked by Anonymous in Social Science ➔ Psychology
No, I would never cheat. It's more like lots of little things, like being late, not being affectionate enough, or making him feel ignored.
2007-10-17 13:27:12 · update #1
You're both going to have to agree not to bring up past events.
2007-10-17 13:24:49 · answer #1 · answered by nursesr4evr 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
First of all, both of you need to check and internalize if you really want and love each other, and will you still respect each other? Will the issue still crop up any time whenever there is a misunderstanding? If both of you have settle this big issue, then forgiveness is the key and accepting each other and start anew.
If there is resentment, then this still has to be worked out. Because sometimes we cannot just say sorry for life to continue like nothing has happened. Like a would, it is still sore. But please do not bump it again because after several wound on the same spot, the wound is not gonna look good. A scar might appear. The baseline is, after talking about it, forget about it and start life anew. Do not do it again.
2007-10-17 13:32:06 · answer #2 · answered by perlas 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well I don't know what mistakes you have made, but if you mean cheating on him, it can be overcome but your both going to have to act like adults, and work very hard to do so. First your going to have to prove that you aren't going to make anymore mistakes, and he has to be able to let go of the past, as you prove the future will bet better. Its going to be tough, but it can and has been done before.
2007-10-17 13:23:14 · answer #3 · answered by scorch_22 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
ofcourse you can. have you forgotten your vows??? i think it is just a matter of miscommunication. ahm i wish my english grammar was right. you two should try to talk about it. it is just a piece of cake if you will realize. in a relationship there will always be misunderstanding,that in any case either it will make your relationship grow,or worse it'll ruin.
2007-10-17 13:30:24 · answer #4 · answered by jel 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you both have to want the help...you have to see a therapist together in order to get out the anger and to let it go....if you both arent on the same page, it wont work.
2007-10-17 13:47:28 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋