I have been married for 20yrs and together with him since high school. I fell out of love with him 5 yrs ago and have just recently seperated and filed for divorce in the last 6 months. On a drunken night hooked up with a long time friend. All people (friends) around us think this is a bad thing that we are doing and we have found that we are very much a like and want to be together. IS this that bad that we should have to wait til I am divorced? Why would I fall for someone so soon and go from one man to another? Looking for unbiased comments.
2007-10-17 12:05:42 · 5 answers · asked by Julez_30 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
According to your own words, you haven't been in love for 5 years. You are most likely missing that feeling and this man helps you to remember what it feels like to be "in love".
Although not technically illegal, you aren't doing anything positive for yourself by having a relationship before the divorce is finalized. A shrewd lawyer will use that and try to make the case that you were involved with that man *before* the divorce--can you *prove* that you were *not* in a relationship? I didn't think so.
It is a shame that things turned out like they did for you. I hope you are looking out for your own emotional best interests through all this.
2007-10-17 12:12:53 · answer #1 · answered by Mathsorcerer 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Because after being married for 20 years - you're used to having a man (any man) around !!!
You should listen to your friends and take it REAL slow. Don't just jump into another relationship because its what you are "used" to. I don't know that it has as much to do with waiting until your divorce is final as it does with you giving yourself some time to heal from the former relationship and figure out (on your own and in your own terms) what exactly it is you want from a future relationship.
Right now - your choices are likely clouded by the pros / cons of the past relationship. Not a good way to start anew.
2007-10-17 12:12:21 · answer #2 · answered by aa889d 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You were married for twenty years to the same man and probably got bored. This new man feels exciting, and also you are comfortable with him because he was a long time friend. I don't see anything wrong in dating him, but I would take it slowly and give yourself some breathing room after a twenty year marriage. Thats a very long time and you need to be single for awhile. Date the friend for fun, but don't plan on marriage or anything like that just yet.
source : I married my long time friend...
2007-10-17 12:18:22 · answer #3 · answered by Brittney 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I in basic terms study the headline. way way long tale. in case you like one yet another nonetheless then bypass over it. only don't be stunned if he does an identical situation that he's doing to his spouse to you.
2016-10-13 00:11:34 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
not condoning affairs.but you are separated,i presume you dont love your ex anymore.and 6 month is a good time for a separation to be sure if you want him. go for it. gal.be happy.hope there r no youngsters to give you hastle.good luck
2007-10-17 12:20:40 · answer #5 · answered by I'll help you---You help me 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋