When my hubby and I go out he gets vry jealous & if another guy talks 2 me wether its his friend or a stranger he claims they wanna have sex w/ me? He has told me that 2 of his friends wanna "bang" me, I personally don't think so but he is insistent on it he ends up getting a lil pissy w/ me & makes me not leave his side. Now when we go out I do dress nice a lil revealing but not slutty, I do show clevage & guys do stare but thats a natural thing I believe. I don't "hang" all over people & I don't flirt around, ok well maybe a lil but its harmless & I don't mean to its just my personality. B4 we leave the house he tries to make me change my clothes into something he thinks is more appropriate(anything that covers me completely)... I have never cheated on him, but he acts like I'm going to or that I have. What is ur opinion on his behavior?
I might add that he did cheat on me 7yrs ago, do u think that has anything to do w/ it? Plz don't be mean I was a lil hesitant on asking this!
2007-10-17 08:48:39 · 45 answers · asked by NONAME 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
hehehe thats funny a 3way I actually did he said no not if its another guy.
2007-10-17 08:52:19 · update #1
bonnie- How does it go "don't hate me cuz u ain't me"... screen name has nothing to do w/ this
2007-10-17 08:55:32 · update #2
It just started about 2 months ago... Thats when we started going out more.
2007-10-17 09:02:09 · update #3
Hence Bonnie I brought the 3way up 2 him w/ another man cuz he asked if I would make his fantasy come true which is 2 girls and I said no but w/ 2 guys we can.
2007-10-17 09:11:25 · update #4
I'm the way I am now becuz of what he did to me just becuz I have an out-going personality doesn't mean I'm a cheater and I have never given him reason to think I would.
2007-10-17 09:15:26 · update #5
Oh he knows its only him I want, are sex life is great and I do dress sexy for him at home I do plenty for him at home to show him. I never use to dress like I do now, and he has never been like this b4...A girlfriend of mine dresses more revealing then me and her hubby just says well shes coming home w/ me so he don't care. I always thought u were suppose to dress nice for ur hubbys when ur out thats why I do and I tell him that!
2007-10-17 09:25:18 · update #6
Oh and a troll I think not, if u see I have only asked 5 Q's... If I wanted to make up sh*t I'd say I was banging all his friends to get the attention, geez sry lives can't be as perfect as some!
2007-10-17 11:54:45 · update #7
Tell him he's being a jackass. HE cheated on you, which is why he's worried. It's always the ones who do something that suspects other people. He needs to get over it or go away. That is no way live, especially if you aren't the one who did anything wrong. He's punishing you for what he did wrong.
2007-10-17 08:53:06 · answer #1 · answered by מימי 6 · 1⤊ 2⤋
Well if you have been together for at least 7 years you should be able to talk to him and ask him what is up. Maybe you should remind him that you love him and that you aren't going anywhere. Remind him that it doesn't matter what his friends want, if you don't want it - besides if he thinks so little of his friends that could be part of the issue right there. You also could try wearing something less revealing a few times so you don't start the night on a bad note. Maybe if it sees that you aren't all about showing off the goods he'll calm down and you can work the sexy some of the time without issues.
2007-10-17 08:59:57 · answer #2 · answered by Pixi6s 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think your marriage needs to become more about compromise and respect. Your husband is obviously bothered by the clothes you wear and the affection you show to other people. You think it's nothing and that he's being possessive. As long as it's not bordering on being a controlling, abusive spouse, you and your husband should be able to share your feelings about this with each other.
If he's acting paranoid about you cheating on him, I'm concerned that he has a guilty conscience and may have cheated again himself. Don't bring this up, but keep your eyes open for it when he responds to your request for a little more personal freedom.
2007-10-17 08:53:38 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Had an ex that did every single one of those things. Told me that the ONLY reason any guy would ever talk to me was because they wanted in my pants, not because they might actually think I was smart, funny, or just enjoyed being friends. It's called CONTROL. Also found out he was cheating on me the whole relationship with various people. He also went psycho on me stalker style when I finally got some sense & nerve to leave.
2007-10-17 09:00:18 · answer #4 · answered by catwoman 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think that the fact that he cheated has a little bit to do with it. People that cheat on their significant others always feel like they will go out and do the same. Maybe he thinks you'll meet someone else or spark interest in some of his friends. He could also just be a jealous guy. I know when my boyfriend and i go out and i get dressed up and we go to places like clubs or bars he always watches me and makes sure no guys walk up to me and talk to me. Has he always been like this or is this new?
2007-10-17 08:54:04 · answer #5 · answered by California Kush 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes when a person is guilty of something, they assume everyone else is too. Since he did cheat on you, he is afraid you will cheat on him. BUT he doesn't get to pick your clothes or keep you from talking to other men. Maybe if you take a time when no one is upset and just tell him he makes you feel bad when he acts that way, and even if those guys do want you, you don't want them, you only want him. We can't tell you for sure why he is that way, but maybe he will. He sounds really controlling and that is not a good think. If you are afraid (of him physically) you need to leave. If you are afraid of his anger, you might need counseling (both of you). And if you just don't like how he acts, maybe you can talk it out. Good luck.
2007-10-17 08:56:08 · answer #6 · answered by mrslititia 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Seriously....why did you marry this man if he is so terrible? Remember, it was YOUR decision to marry him. Was he like this before? Or did you think you could "fix" him?
I really think he's insecure and is uncomfortable with his WIFE enjoying this male attention. Yea sure I enjoy knowing I still got it. However, let him know he's number one. Not by saying it but by actions by dressing sexy for him at home or giving him your full attention while out with him instead of being so aware of the other men in the room. If you truly love him you'll do this for him.
Take care of your man sister or trust me someone else will!
Good luck and God bless!
2007-10-17 09:02:25 · answer #7 · answered by Lakin J 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
There are 2 reasons that I can think of- 1) insecurity and 2) he knows what he is (was?) like and thinks that everyone is like that- all I can say is that I am sorry and I hope you wont put up with it. He should be glad that other men find you attactive and should consider himself lucky that you are still with him after he cheated on you. Hang in there and dont change your personality to satisfy his guilt and jealousy- he is the one who did wrong, NOT you!
2007-10-17 08:54:54 · answer #8 · answered by merlotded 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He is probably more suspicious of you because of how he personally feels insecure about his own loyalty to you, so yes that would have something to do with it. There is nothing wrong with dressing nice and being friendly, but don't be suggestive with other men. They will think thing, they will want you, and they don't care about him -- friends or not, that is how guys are. Anyway ... if he is being outrageous and not letting you talk to people that is not okay. Possibly seek couples therapy to work on this issue. Good luck!
2007-10-17 09:17:57 · answer #9 · answered by Eagiusti 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
hmm... to me it sounds like he is very insecure.
he may be thinking that he is insufficient for you and that sooner or later you will find someone better than him then leave him for someone else.
Another major reason that can cause insecurity which is being raised in environment full of uncertainty and insecurity, for example most people whom are raised in a families having finical problems or families that are constantly worried about money matters become insecure grownups.
In order to deal with his feelings of insecurity you must fight the root cause that made those feelings of insecurity appear in his life.
Communicate!!!! - this is probably the best thing to do, talk and find out where his head is at. You can also affirm why you married him and that your not going to leave him for anyone else... even just letting him know all the qualities about him that you love the most.
2007-10-17 08:51:25 · answer #10 · answered by Anomoly 3 · 3⤊ 1⤋
Sounds to me like he's very insecure with both himself and the fact that you want to be with him. It's probably fueled by having some friends tell him his wife is hot or they would like to have sex with you.
What you describe goes way beyond a little jealousy. I don't know if there is anything you can say or do, but be careful. If he is always like this, there's no telling what he might do if he finds you "being too friendly" with the grocery store clerk or the mail man.
2007-10-17 08:56:11 · answer #11 · answered by Justin H 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋