Does My Marriage Have A Chance?

Question

Please read my prior question to better understand my question. Does my marriage have a chance, do you think if I give my husband space, not call him that in time his heart will soften, that he will come to miss me, or do you think he will never call me and not want to continue in our marriage? I feel so down right now and am looking for serious answers to my questions from people who will really give my questions some thought. Thank you.

Answer 1

Dear, i think you are just taking everything too seriously, these emotions like love and hatred do not develop in a day or disappear in a day. he might be mad at you for not trusting him, but that doesnt mean that he has started to hate you. call him and tell him that you are emtionally vulnerable now bcz of your fear of cancer and you need him now more that you need him before. may be you were arguing with him too often that s why he might have thought that its better not to talk than to fight all the time.
work on the relationship its never too late. you are married to him, this shows that you are important to him.

Answer 2

I went back and read all of your questions in order to understand better what may be going on so that now I can give you a better opinion. I think you are a very good person who wants the marriage to work but who made the mistake of marrying someone you should not have. When you talk about him hanging up on you and not calling for for a week, that tells me he either doesn't care or is doing a lot of running around and doesn't have time to call even his wife. You should not feel down because I have seen from other questions that you have done a lot more than many women would do to keep the marriage going. Let him call you and then ask him if he wants a divorce and see what his answer is. I promise you though that if he does want a divorce, you will find someone who will treat you a lot better than this man is treating you and probably be much happier with a man who loves you and shows it rather than ignoring you for days at a time. good luck in the and also the medical problem as well!!

Answer 3

If the circumstances are the same the odds are that the result will be the same. Think back and see what would have made the first marriage work for the duration. Evaluate the second by comparing facts and people. The only thing that makes a marriage is love and a willingness to give back to the marriage what you want from the marriage and a partner that embraces the same philosophy. Sounds easy but most complicate the entire process with misarranged priorities.

Answer 4

All marraiges have more than a chance. But you need to focus on what you "can" do to help your situation.

While you can't change him, you can and must change you to help.

It's a rough situation, and you are hurting. Usually "space apart" from each other is not generally a good idea and does not end up with both being back together.

Remember, there are many different ways to communicate. I would recommend intesifying your communication efforts before all is lost. However, "how" you communicate is as detrimental or instrumental as anything at this point.

Understand, that you are willing to make the marraige the most important, and do what it takes to meet his needs and you "want" to make things right.

In your communication, just make sure there is no blaming, venting, lashing out, etc. Bring the responsiblities of your own actions on yourself, so he doesn't feel blamed for your actions as well.

All you can do is what you can do. Fate or "if it's meant to be" plays no part. It's what both parties "make of it" that will determine the outcome. Leaving things to chance is like throwing flowers in the air, and saying if the pedals falls back on the stem into place, then it was always meant to be.

Right now, it takes gruelling work. Extra work on your part now to find out how to "win your spouse back".

If he is beyond the point of returning and being a mature husband, and he files for divorce, then at the very least, you have fought for your marraige. You will have obtained incredible maturity and understanding. Hang in there. Make sure you have much positive, helpful, unbiased support and friends.

Answer 5

I want my husband to give me space, and it infuriates me that he won't. I think that someday I would find him more attractive (maybe have a relationship with him outside of a marriage) if he would move on. I can't stand the neediness, begging, and inability to grasp reality. Give the man a break. If you are meant to be together someday (maybe in an unconventional relationship) than it will happen. Just being honest!

Answer 6

Sounds like you're both pretty immature.
You sound really needy, and he's playing on that.
How about you both get counseling and figure out how to become adults and work on your marriage?

Answer 7

If it was meant to be for him to come back he will. If not then oh well. I know it is hard and you want him back badly but you need to go out and have fun. Start living your life for yourself now. The more you do for yourself the better you feel and the better you look to him. If you show him how upset you are and boo hooing all the time he will not respect you.

Answer 8

You need to be respectful whenever you speak to him. Telling him what to do & say is not respectful.
Allow him to make his own decisions.
Learn to accept & live with them.
Develop empathy for what he has gone through, & probably still does... The way you treat him can bring on memories --& the feeling-- of being abused. (Disrespect *is* a form of abuse.) Learn to avoid triggering such.

Answer 9

call your husband but dont fight with him. you can get a man to do anything for you by being nice to him and not by trying to dominate him. even if you dont get instant results over time your husband will realise the injustice done to you and make amends for it.

Answer 10

NOOOOOOO, now move on and find someone who will treat you right and that won't be so frick'n childish!