I don't know what it is, but I love men (and not just in a sexual way either). I love to be around men. I love talking to men and asking them their thoughts and opinions, not just flirting. I find it easier to get along with men than I do women and I relax when I'm around men. (With women I'm always worried about what they really think and looking for hidden meanings in what they say, like I'm just waiting to start an arguement or fight. I don't do catty comments and I'm not into having "frienimies".) I feel like I'm the only girl who feels this way though. When all my friends are bashing guys I'm always the one who's defending them.
I guess my questions are:
1) Is this normal?
2) Am I the only one who feels this way?
3) Can anyone give me a reason why I feel
this way? I have no brothers, my male
cousins live 900 miles away, and my dad
and I have a normal relationship (I'm not
"daddy's little girl" but we get along well.)
Thnx and please be nice!
2007-10-17 05:32:07 · 25 answers · asked by Annie 4 in Social Science ➔ Gender Studies
All of your answers were great!!! Thank you soooo much! Baba Yaga, Brittany Lou, Sleepingliv, Lioness, Jim Braw, all of ya'll had great answers! Everyone, I mean it, thank you sooo much!! I'm not going to pick a Best Answer because they were all great!!! I totally feel understood! I will take everyone's answer into account! Thnx again!!!
2007-10-17 09:50:55 · update #1
You sound extremely insecure. Why do you worry so much about what women really think? This shows that you lack self-confidence or have low self-esteem. Stop being so prejudice against women. Not all women are catty or want to start a fight. This is all in your imagination and you need to change this mentality. Women can make very good friends too, if you give them a chance. You're being too judgmental. You're probably get jealous of other women easily.
Jim Baw is absolutely right. Not getting along with other women and having no (or very few) female friends are considered warning signs by men. Don't fool yourself into thinking that you're impressing guys by behaving the way you do. You're not. In fact, most guys find this a real turn off. They'll think that there's something wrong with you and not want to be with you. Really, you need to grow up.
2007-10-17 18:21:59 · answer #1 · answered by ArAmG 4 · 4⤊ 1⤋
When I was younger I felt like you do. Now that I'm old (50), I really enjoy being with women. I think this camaraderie with my own kind happened after I had kids and I had to find friends for them!
The "cattyness" is no longer in play since you don't feel the need to compete for male attention (you just get it because you are all couples together).
"Frienimies"? Never happen.
2007-10-17 05:48:44 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Very normal.
Many women feel this same way, some all the time, others just at certain periods in their lives.
I think that friendships with women are a lot of work, I feel that men are more laid back and friendships with men don't require as much effort. I think you just understand men well and maybe at this point in your life you are not around women who are more like you. It might change for you at some point in your life, but even if doesn't, at least you have friends.
2007-10-17 14:02:52 · answer #3 · answered by Mandy 3 · 1⤊ 2⤋
Yeah I have mostly male than female friends. I just get along better and communicate more freely with men. I'm only guarded when it comes to getting intimate/sexual/romantic---and I know exactly how to keep them in check in that department, so it's mostly a non-issue. However, with women, it's an entirely different story. I'm very guarded and close even with those I somewhat know. I'm always suspicious about their intentions, potential jealously, flipping the script and a lot of other issues. This may be due to the fact that I'm a woman and know what I'm capable of, so I suspect other women to be the same way? I don't know.
2007-10-17 05:55:57 · answer #4 · answered by Lioness 6 · 3⤊ 2⤋
No, you are not the only one who feels this way.
I get along a lot better with men and have always been fascinated by the male psyche. I prefer working for men and being around them. The women friends that I've had have always turned out to be too emotionally needy and way too demanding of my time.
2007-10-17 05:42:33 · answer #5 · answered by sleepingliv 7 · 1⤊ 2⤋
I don't have any brothers, either (but I have three sisters), and I'm not particularly close to my dad...but I do feel the same way you do- I tend to get along better with guys than I do gals. (I have a few close friends who are women, though.) It's just that I'm not into having a bunch of "fair weather" friends. I'm not into competition with the people I'm friends with. I have a hard time understanding why anyone would find value in "friendships" that aren't actually based on friendship! I guess I'm not a shallow person...if there's no connection, there's no connection.
I did grow up in a neighborhood where there were many more guys than girls. I guess that's why I am comfortable being around guys...we were all pretty close. My best friend (a girl) lived right across the street from me, but there were about ten boys we were friends with who lived in the immediate area, and they treated us like "one of the gang." So maybe that's where I get it from. I can't stand to be around women who are two-faced, gossips, competitive, shallow, materialistic, or egotistical. Not all women are that way, but it seems there are quite a few. It's just not my cup of tea. I have better things to do with my time than waste it trying to impress people. I like to be accepted for who I am. Men don't tend to see me as a threat to their security...but I have came across women who instantly hated me because I was thinner than they were, or whatever....I can't stand that kind of nonsense.
2007-10-17 07:10:22 · answer #6 · answered by It's Ms. Fusion if you're Nasty! 7 · 2⤊ 2⤋
Granted, I like hanging around with men, but you said in your question that you are “always worried about what they (women) really think and looking for hidden meanings in what they say, like I'm just waiting to start an arguement (sic) or fight.”
I think women intimidate you. Do you feel that you’re not at their level either intellectually, physically, or emotionally?
Maybe you should give the women in your life a chance. We’re not all looking for hidden meanings or trying to start arguments. And if the women you know ARE like this, then maybe it’s time for you to meet other women.
2007-10-17 05:47:08 · answer #7 · answered by Rainbow 6 · 0⤊ 2⤋
1) Completely normal.
2) Absolutely not!
3) Think about it... men are so much more simple creatures than women are! With (the majority of) men, what you see is what you get. They don't play mind games. They're just... simple, like I said. Now don't get me wrong, I do understand there are plenty of men out there that are just as manipulative as women, just as I understand women too can be simple. I'm just speaking as a majority issue. It makes complete sense that you feel this way. Men do make such better friends. And so do women who feel the same!!!
2007-10-17 05:51:09 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 3⤋
I do like being friends with men more than women, but my best friend is a woman. As for being around them all the time... I'd rather not. Men can be annoying as all heck. But so can women... Hmmm, maybe I'd just rather be alone, lol.
2007-10-17 05:55:04 · answer #9 · answered by Sarah R 6 · 0⤊ 2⤋
i'm sure that's considered normal.
i have a few female friends, and i'm most comfortable around them, personally, but they don't bash guys or act all catty, they are genuine in all they do. i've been friends with them for over a decade. i've known my best friend for over 20 yrs! (since kindergarten--but we weren't really friends way back then)
*i'm* actually more wary of ulterior motives of guys, because i've encountered so many that were out to get something sexual from me.
but it sounds like we're around different types of people :)
2007-10-17 05:59:59 · answer #10 · answered by Ember Halo 6 · 2⤊ 2⤋