Recently my husband told me he is not in love with me anymore. I still love him very much. Do I just give him what he wants or fight for what I want?
2007-10-16 22:21:36 · 15 answers · asked by girlnextdoor 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
You can't make someone love you that doesn't love you back. Why should you give your all to someone that doesn't want you. My suggestion is for you to go on with your life and find yourself. Staying in a marriage like that will exhaust you mentally and physically.He want appreciate you he'll just give you his behind to kiss. Don't waste you life on hopelessness. You will always have a empty feeling, as if you are the loneliest person in the world.
2007-10-17 04:45:44 · answer #1 · answered by Thunder 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry this has happened to you - it must hurt very much.
I don't think you can make someone love you. I think you've just got to give yourself a bit of time and see how things pan out.
I don't think you should throw the towel in straightaway, but set yourself a deadline, say 6 months? If things are still the same, then you deserve to be with someone who reciprocates your feelings. Believe me, you will end up being MUCH lonelier in this marriage than you would be on your own.
So give it time, but make sure you set a mark - if things haven't improved then move on.
All the best x
2007-10-17 05:33:52 · answer #2 · answered by Clare 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I know how those statements hurt. That's what my ex said to me. One thing that you should be clear on is that you are not in control of someone elses' emotions. He has to decide if he wants to love you or not.
Things to do at this point in time would be, go see a therapist for yourself. Make sure that you have someone to talk to about how you feel. If things go well, then they helped you though the rough waters. If things go poorly, then they can help you through the rough waters. In any event it's a win-win situation there.
One of the best things for you to do is to look at yourself and ask if you would date the person that you are. If the answer to that is no, then set a plan on doing what you need to do to change that answer to a yes.
2007-10-17 05:44:38 · answer #3 · answered by wildwillyinva 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm very sorry, but you can't keep love by fighting. Nothing can make a person love, or stay. I'm not saying you should end your marriage, only that EVERY marriage is voluntary, or it's just a legal fiction. A marriage takes two people to make it work, but it can be destroyed by just one.
2007-10-17 09:48:30 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It all depends if he's worth your effort and time. If the answer is,yes. I recommend council therapy. Maybe what he wants from a relationship is something that you can not give him. If that is the case, I recommend leaving him. You never want to compromise your belief on what you deserve....
I'm sorry he told you that he's not in love with you. However, those words are a great motivator out of the mundane of a relationship...
Good Luck!
2007-10-17 05:49:15 · answer #5 · answered by Sara O 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
what exactly does he want? anyway when love dies there is no solution to it because he has made up his mind may be there is another woman he want to give a try. just let him go in due time if he is really your true husband he come back to you. even when you try harder to win his love back he will still considering if you really worth staying with or not in his mind. Good luck in your decision.
2007-10-17 06:20:25 · answer #6 · answered by beauty 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honey, if he does not love you anymore, I am sorry, but you have to give him what he wants to make him happy and you happy also.
Some good friends of our family were exactly like that, his wife just told him one day, she wanted "out", and she left!!!
He was hurt, of course, but it took some time for him to get over it, and now he is happy, and doing wonderful without her!!!!!
2007-10-17 06:03:04 · answer #7 · answered by carriegreen13 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You know what let him go the dog . if he thinks the grass is greener on the other side he will find out that is not true. and he is a cold hearted jerk to tell you something like that anyway ,he has no compassion or understanding . take him for everything he is worth in Divorce Court !!!!!
2007-10-17 06:42:08 · answer #8 · answered by Kate T. 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
this is very sad, but if he dosnt love you anymore it shall be futile for you to persue him, infact if he really dosnt love you it could lead to violence due to your persistance, back off, let him go, and do the best you can to cope with your broken heart, been their and done that myself, its not any fun at all.
2007-10-17 08:20:05 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
well this will hurt ...when men says to their wife that they dont love them anymore it is hard to fight for it..when the love is not there anymore...so there is nothing left in there for you to do.give him and yourself some space...!!
If he made a wrong decision he will run right back to you.
Im sorry to hear that...!!
May God give you the strength you need....
2007-10-17 05:28:47 · answer #10 · answered by ? 3 · 5⤊ 0⤋