Why does the husband get to be in charge of the relationship and the woman have to obey him?

Question

I'm just curious :) I'm not trying to say it shouldn't be that way, but I just want to know the right answer.

Answer 1

Where are you from? It's not that way in my house.

Answer 2

This actually depends on the couple and the kind of culture that they've been raised with. Typically, this is what happens among married people because of our patriarchal society. In general, men are viewed as stronger/tougher than women physically and sometimes emotionally too (because its seldom we see them fret, cry or even breakdown). However, studies have proven that this is not so. Women are emotionally stronger and are more flexible than men when in comes to handling relationships. This is the reason why the wife tends to listen and obey her husband. Its a coping or control mechanism to get hold of, or balance, the marriage. It may seem at first that the husband is in charge. But actually, it is the woman who is in control of the relationship. If not for the loving and patient nature of women, the marriage would not last or worse, it wouldn't even happen in the first place.

Answer 3

i think the way you posed your question has created some controversy...

marriage is a two way street. there isnt a "man" in charge and a "woman" who obeys...it sorta sounds like the old barefoot and pregnant addage of old days, and comes off the wrong way.

marriage is a respect and trust thing. sure, both parties are in the growing process and may get into arguments over who's right and who's wrong, but the real gyst of it is, its a coming together of two different people to create a new and compatible lifestyle together, harmoniously. both will mess up, and will have to fess up to each other at some point, but neither is superior to the other.

you learn how to respect each other in the midst of the transition. and respect will render love, which renders a desire to physically and emotionally comfort and support each other. but, it takes commitment, communication and diligence to get to this point.

hope that explanation works.

Answer 4

Because these guidelines were made up in society heavily dominated by men. Women were only valuable for childbirth and childcare, so being merely vessels for future boys and baby makers it follows quite logically that women shouldn't try to dominate. It wasn't until a few hundred years ago that men got together and decided that women have a soul. Yes, that's right, society has been so heavily dominated by men for so long that women didn't officially have a soul until the 1800s and even then it was debated. In the early 1900s along came a real woman's movement, where souless or soulful? women stood up for themselves and decided that they were people too, but of course 100 years later we're still arguing this point because of backlash and backward women who are 'not trying to say it shouldn't be that way'. Yea, right. If you're a woman who wants to return to traditionals, you may as well being saying you want to be a dog, a housetrained and working dog, but a dog nonetheness.

Answer 5

Where is that written? Husband and wife are meant to be a team. Sometimes one takes charge, sometimes the other. It all depends what's going on, who cares most, who has the money to pay, who's had more sleep etc.
Sometimes it's nice for my hubby to be in charge so I don't have to be! Other times it's nice for me to be in charge so I get my own way! The same for him. It's too much responsibility to be the boss all the time, and depressing if you are the boss none of the time.

Answer 6

When you enter a relationship on equal footing, it is much easier to maintain the balance throughout the duration.

To help achieve this balance, find a partner you see eye-to-eye with on the important issues: Sex, children, finances, religion, work (who will/will not), drugs, etc.

Know what he expects from you and vise versa going into the relationship. DON'T think that you will change him or he you.

Answer 7

Well, I WILL say it isn't supposed to be that way. In my opinion the only marriage worth having is a true partnership between equals. That's the kind I have, and it's wonderful.

Answer 8

A good man will actually move the relationship for the benefit of his WIFE, not himself. He will see her view of things and take her best interest into account.

AND I just wanted to say women had souls before the 1800's. Galations 3:28 "...neither male nore female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus."

Answer 9

Traditionally and it is our culture that the head of the family is the father hwose main obligation is to feed his family and the mother is to take care of the family and supporting his husband is her main obligations.

If you object to this and you need to reivise the traditions and cultures and you need to be the rule provider to the family.

Answer 10

No, you have it all wrong. The woman is really in charge, she just lets her husband think he is. Micromanagement is the foundations of anything and everything, including marriage.

Answer 11

If you fully appreciated the beauty of being a woman and how marvelously different it is from being a man AND you had a real man....then trust me, honey...you would NEVER be so blissfully happy.

And I hate to disappoint all those who say otherwise, but "Happy" means NOT being treated like a lapdog or some kind of doormat. Being a woman is just as valuable as being a man.