If your father twisted your eleven year old child's arm until he/she was screaming what would you do?

Answer 1

step1-get the child away from him-immediately, by whatever means necessary

step2-make sure that he COMPLETELY understands that he will NEVER lay a hand on my child again

step 3-call the ambulance for my father

Answer 2

I saw your question and my mouth fell open. Short of killing him I would never, EVER allow him around my child again and I would undoubtedly threaten to call the police. Then I would hold that child until he/she was 82 and never let go.

Police involvement probably wouldn't help a whit this time but the threat is usually a good one to make sure he stays away. I would - my God, Tash, this is a touchy subject with me, cruelty toward children - I would explain to my child that in no way was what happened right or their fault and I would promise to always protect them. I know we cannot all the time but a child that age (and after experiencing that trauma) should know and believe that his parent(s) are there to protect him - and that Grandpa is an abusive, sorry, small man.

If my father did that to my child, he would no longer be my father.

(((Tash)) And if anyone did that to you, I'd eat them.

Answer 3

Well you didnt say how this situation came to be. You need to consider if this was an out of character event, if this was an everyday event for yourself when you were a child, or did you maybe walk into some play fighting that got out of hand?

So talking all this into consideration, you need to decide whats in the best interests of your child. Supervised visits, no further contact with your father, or involving the law.

I also believe it would be a good idea to sit down with your child and talk about what happened, how did this situation unfold - it sounds like you walked into the tail end of something.
You should also discuss the same with your father, what where the events that lead to this?
If you continue to allow your father to see your child, what are you going to do to prevent this situation from happening again?
Regardless you need to regain the trust in your father if you have found error in his ways ONCE you have talked to him and judging from his past history - your childhood and that of your siblings and their children.
Your child deserves to have his grandfather in his life and eveything that he can benifit from the man, a broken arm and a bad attitude arent the things your looking to impress upon your 11 year old.
You may also want to ask your child if this has happened before and to what extent.

For all you know, they were play fighting or role playing and it just got out of hand and maybe your father didnt realize what had happened cuz it happened so fast.

Put your interests and opinions aside before you jump to conclusions, but when you get those conclusions and there is need to jump, jump big. You protect your child at all costs.

Answer 4

Wow. I understand the delima that you have. But I want you to think for a moment...whom between the two would you put your life on the line for. The answer should be a no brainer. Your priority should be your child. You do not have to burn bridges with your father. Step up to the plate for your child and explain to your father that you cannot tolerate him hurting your child and if he cannot control his anger than he will lose the priviledge of seeing your child. That should do it. He is not expecting you to react in this way that is why it will have an impact. Take care of your baby first.

Answer 5

I'd tell him if he ever lays a hand on my kid again im reporting him to the police and I'd also kick him out of my house and not let him around the child again without someone always being there , but hands off is definitely the message hede get from me

Answer 6

I'd break Dad's arm. Seriously.
Nobody hurts my kids, not my father, not my husband, not the cops, not a teacher. Yow, just thinking about it makes me so furious, I couldn't speak, I'd just turn into this ball of fury with sharp edges and heavy weapons.
(low growl)

Answer 7

I have been in this situation with my father in law. I walked up to him, picked up my child and calmly told him in a whisper in his ear to take his Fu@king hands off my son, and then I gave him the biggest smile you can imagine.

I have never left my children alone with him again.

Answer 8

I would tell some one so thay can help him and you. Hitting or twisting arms is wrong. He can go to jail for that and lose his children. Children are a gift from God. Thay are very special people.

Answer 9

Goodness he twisted your child's arm! Danger, caution, warning! He needs to be reported to CPS or he should get some help.

Answer 10

Before or after someone bonded me out? You must not make the mistake of thinking anything you threaten will change behavior that violent against a helpless child. Your father needs professional help, and it is up to you to keep the child protected. If you were abused as well, then please get help. It is a cycle.