I'm a 14year old straight guy but I hate being a guy and being treat like a guy and just love being treat like a girl. I hate wearing baggy clothing and trousers and would rather wear skirts and tight clothing. I'd love to join a cheerleading squad or netball team and I hate football or any rough sports, okay I like basketball abit. I have aload of friends who are girls and one is even my exgirlfriend, who's really kind and understanding but me and her more or less flirt with each other alot but I've opened up to them about me wanting to be treat like a girl and they've been really understanding and they just treat me like I'm another girl. I love clothe shopping although I stick to buying boy's clothes as I'm really self conscious and doing other girly stuff rather then playing video games and that. I like having girly chats with my mates rather then talking about sex with the guys and I just love acting like a girl but alot of things I feel I can't do because I'm a guy and I'm...
2007-10-16 08:00:34 · 39 answers · asked by Lily R 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
...just beginning to feel like I'm a lesbian stuck in a guys body.
From what I've said do you think that I'd feel happier as a girl?
2007-10-16 08:00:49 · update #1
Just to say I know there's downsides to being a girl and there are to both genders but I hate everything about being a guy apart from it's easier to get a girlfriend, there are actually things I'd like about being a girl even though there are downsides but being a guy I hate it completely.
2007-10-16 09:36:06 · update #2
I think you're a little young to be thinking about sex changes
but if you are happier in girls clothes wear them, and if you like acting like a girl do it.
Live life to the fullest and be happy
2007-10-16 08:05:21 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 5⤊ 3⤋
First off, I want to say that there are unrealistic masculine stereotypes here:
Sport, for example.
I know, I am not sporty at all, being artistic. I learnt only this weekend that the rugby teams march their country's flag in front of them onto the sport's field. My housemates were hosing themselves with laughter at how absolutely NOTHING I know about sports.
That is okay. Being a man does not mean that you are into rough sports.
I think it means you have a penis and testosterone.
So I would say first that your idea of what is masculine is warped.
If you do not like the rough tumble and brauny conversation of men, and prefer the conversation of women, it probably means you are of higher intelligence, more sophisticated and not a brute.
(If a person reading this answer is rough and tough and sporty, that is great; what you are is awesome, I do not mean that insultingly)
Now, it is possible that you want to act like a girl because you feel un-jockish, and don't want to be associated with this masculine image.
Before you haul out the fishnet stockings, I would suggest finding yourself some SOPHISTICATED male friends, so that you can have a broader perspective on what it is to be a man.
You are fourteen years old, which means you are old enough to be defining your sexual identity, but a little bit too young to understand the variety that exists in life.
Are you involved in theatre?
I love theatre. I love being on stage, and I get to play dressup, and be exuberant and even have a sophisticated gay-sounding performer's accent.
Art?
Creative writing? Is there a school newspaper you can write for?
Before forsaking a masculine identity, first explore the aspects of masculinity.
If, after surrounding yourself with many forms of masculinity, you still feel you will be happier as a transvestite, go for it. Just don't make any life altering decision RIGHT NOW.
I hope that helps.
Be sophisticated.
2007-10-16 10:29:18 · answer #2 · answered by 1Up 7 · 2⤊ 1⤋
No, because you're not a girl. You're a guy.
If you don't like the stereotypical "manly" type things, then don't partake.
I don't like watching sports at all...bores me to tears most times, I like designing, painting, sculpting, I love to enjoy nature and I can stare at the sky for hours, and most of my friends are women because I enjoy their company and talking with them more often. Though women, from what I have observed, do worry immensely more about "speculation," the "do you think they think I'm being....etc etc" than men do. (It's only a generalization! But it is what I have experienced...and no it doesn't mean men are any better than women! - Just to be perfectly clear... ;)
I like being a man because I am a man, and I am certainly not worried about what the "manlier men" of the world think about it. If I choose to play with a bunny rabbit, or run around picking flowers, or climb a tree, or splash in a puddle, or pick out art supplies or go grocery shopping for an hour, looking through all the isles..then that's what I'll do. I'd rather read a book than go to someone's house to watch wrestling. I'd rather go to a family reunion than go to a club. If I want to build something with power tools, then I will do that too. We are who we are and we do what is more comfortable for us...but this does not mean we will always be comfortable...or even that we should be comfortable in every situation. Some of the most amazing things can happen when we're not comfortable...like working up the nerve to tell a woman you think she's beautiful, even if she's never even looked at you, and may never look at you again...but maybe she will after that.
That takes courage and strength of a different kind. Also, just because people like different things, doesn't mean they are weak or less manly. Doing what is right instead of what is easy takes courage and moral strength that far outweighs any appearance of "manliness." A man who wants other men to like him or think he's as tough as they are is actually a simple follower...but what is it exactly that he is following? Guys who see other guys treat women badly and do the same to fit in...they are more cowardly than anything.
So be who you are...an young man that doesn't fit a stereotype.
Dressing like a woman is trying to be what you are not...that's not beneficial to you, but no one says you can't wear a kilt...Scots get away with it. You are attracted to women as any man should be, so why are you worried about not liking the same things as every other male when it comes to fashion and activity?
We all like different things. Trying to change "what" you are, because others may not accept "who" you are is a waste of your time, energy and sanity, and is very "short" sighted.
Take Care and God Bless.
2007-10-16 08:39:10 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 1⤋
Well maybe, think sbout it from both sides though. Yes you enjoy the perks of being a woman IE shopping chatting, chillin at the mall, whatever, but there are down sides. IF you were a girl you would be under constant watch from everyone around you, this group thinking your a ****, that group thinking your a *****. guys hitting on you left and right, and not even cute guys! honestlly its insulting to me when a guy walks up and thinks he's gonnaget anything out of me let alone thinnking he's good enough to speak to me. Then there are the sterotypes..women are bad drivers, women need to cook, and clean and are on earth to have babies... not to mention women in the work place are STILL paid 75 cents on the dollar compared to a man doing the exact same job with the exact same qualififcations....
My advice, enjoy having the exterior of a man and enjoy having awesome freinds who know you and know how to talk to you and love you for who you are.
2007-10-16 08:08:10 · answer #4 · answered by sundevildancer 2 · 3⤊ 1⤋
It's your life and it's a short one so you have to do your best to be happy. If dressing as a girl and being treated as one will make you happy go for it. I think you will have to wait until you are older before you do it properly but you can start planning. Look for a career that you can do equally well which ever sex you choose. You may be a transsexual or a transvestite but the full feelings may do develop until you are more mature so this is another reason to be patient and wait for a while before fully deciding. In the mean time have fun and if you get the opportunity to "dress" take it and enjoy
2007-10-16 10:54:48 · answer #5 · answered by Maid Angela 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
You like wearing girls clothes? Okay, but do you want female genitalia? I know this must be a tough time for you but at your age alot of things are confusing and alot of people are questioning their sexuality. Hormones, I know. Just wait things out, see if your opinions change and when you are older decide if you are just a crossdresser or transgender. Good Luck and best wishes to you.
2007-10-16 13:02:19 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
where are you going with this? from what I just read seems like your happy enough being a guy who acts like a girl. I'm guessing you want a sex transplant or something along the lines of that, and you can very well get one, but changing that part isn't going to make you more of a woman. and i wouldn't trust that stuff anyway, seems real messy to me, i mean can you ever really know if this is how having a girl's part will feel?
2007-10-16 08:07:47 · answer #7 · answered by metalmonkey71 1 · 3⤊ 2⤋
I think you sound like you will be happier as a girl. It is a big change though, you really need to look into it before you start making the physical changes. I feel the same way myself... It helps to research it but also to think for yourself. What do you see yourself more as, effemenant or female? Please look into it but do not rush to conclusions, if you ignore it, or jump to the wrong conclusion you could end up hurting yourself.
I included some resources that helped me sort out these feelings personally. Just ignore the biggots, but be open to all possibilities. If you're really a girl inside you'll know.
2007-10-16 08:37:09 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 2⤋
You know there are lots of clothes that you can wear that are tight and stuff that aren't skirts or "girls clothes" I think what I would say you are is more of a metrosexual. You're attracted to girls sexually yet you enjoy doing things that most guys don't. Getting pedicure and manicures, talking "girl talk" doing "girl" sports. The problem here is that our society tells you that as a guy you can't do those things. That's wrong, honey if you want to cheer then go do it! If you want to talk with girls like you're one of the girls then go do it! Society doesn't look at a girl weird when she wants to be "one of the guys" or a tomboy...so why shouldn't you be "one of the girls" be happy with who you are honey and do what you want to do. Dress how you want to dress and play the sports you want to play. Hope this helps.
2007-10-16 08:07:23 · answer #9 · answered by Amy 2 · 2⤊ 3⤋
There is a state or mind or being yourself called "androgeny" that means feeling more sensitive or more at home with things usually associated with the opposite sex.
In other words, you may be genuinely androgenous or could be something else. Although it may not feel good to hear it, it is possible that you won't really know for sure for a while. If your mates appreciate and accept you, that is the main thing. Try to be yourself and in time you will have a better idea of your overall sexual identity.
2007-10-16 08:07:04 · answer #10 · answered by Charles-CeeJay_UK_ USA/CheekyLad 7 · 3⤊ 3⤋
sweetie it does not matter if you are a boy or a girl unless you learn to love yourself it won't matter what sex you are because you will never be happy, find the peace within yourself before you decide whether to live your life as a boy or a girl, best of luck with your life i hope you find the peace you are looking for,
2007-10-18 07:59:32 · answer #11 · answered by fruitcake 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋