i am not married it is happening to someone i care about very much (family member)
her husband cheated on her this whole summer and she seperating and it gets worst she has three kids under 12. his girlfriend is actual therpist and been married three times (great therapist auh)
but that is not the bad stuff it is been going for years for money issues and having them gone for 15 yrs in another state and finally move back with his backing in the area about two yrs ago. (THEIR WAS NO ABUSE INVOVLED) the had money issues too. and i never like his attitude myself.
first of all as a sister what should i do and why?
and what should she do she still love him obviously for not divorcing what up front and why?
2007-10-16 05:07:44 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
WHAT THE HELL YOU JUDGE ME AND MY SISTER WHY CAN'T YOU READ WE ARE CLOSE. ALSO I AM NOT A CHILD I AM YOUNGER BUT IN MY 30S
2007-10-17 02:10:15 · update #1
For one thing, if this therapist that he has been having an affair with was one he was seeing then this is cause to be reported as their is a law against therapists having any type of sexual relationship with their clients. As for your friend, it is a sad situation she is in and I can sympathise, but if she is not willing to obtain a divorce then there is nothing you as a friend can do other than offer your love and support. You say she still loves him, I feel she feels this way because of her needing him as it must be very difficult for her to raise three children on her own, so for this her feelings seem misplaced. Too bad she has not seeked the help of a divorce attorney as she is cheating herself out of collecting child support payments as well as alimony, money she could very well use. Otherwise her husband is getting off easy, while he plays with his new honey, she is at home struggling to raise the children. Unless she is willing to stand up for herself and better her situation financially at least, there is nothing more you can do but to advise her and be there for her.
2007-10-16 07:14:17 · answer #1 · answered by pictureshygirl 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
As a sister, be there for her. Help her when she needs it, and give some helpful advice to her. She's going through a lot right now. But..the guy has been cheating on her for quite some time. I know it might hurt her, but I think it's time for a divorce. Or she can stay separated and just move on with her life, perhaps tell her guy to leave the other woman alone (get counseling) if they want to work things out.
2007-10-16 12:15:09 · answer #2 · answered by **Mystica** 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Tell your sister to leave him. Evidently he doesn't love her or care about the kids enough to quit having the affair, especially since he had it all summer. There is no room for a girlfriend in a marriage when you have three kids. Tell her to get out on her on, she can do it and leave him behind. She needs to find someone that will return her love and care for her kids at the same time. Don't stick with a loser.
2007-10-16 13:56:53 · answer #3 · answered by God Bless America 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
All you can do is listen if she turns to you for support. Under no circumstances are you to offer an opinion on this guy or their marriage. She may resent you later for putting her hubby down if she stays with him. Some folks don't think they can get or deserve better treatment than what you've described. You need to let her know she has to stand up for herself and demand a better life for herself. If this doesn't include the man, so be it. She may be staying for the kids, but it will cause them more problems growing up in that kind of negative environment. Take care.
2007-10-16 12:49:16 · answer #4 · answered by Really now 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Try speaking english. Toss in a few articles and some subject/verb agreement. Your friend is a boot head. Do you think she would love him if he were faithful? What kind of an answer did you expect?
2007-10-16 12:29:55 · answer #5 · answered by diamond_kursed 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Tho difficult, there is nothing you could/should be doing.
SHE is the adult, and should make her own choices. Dont try to sway her to do anything. Perhaps suggest, she speak with a professional to sort it all out properly....thus enabling her to make her own best decision.
2007-10-16 12:58:32 · answer #6 · answered by iyamacog 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Just support her in her decisions. It isn't your place to get involved even if you don't like the louse. If she asks for help, help her. That's all you can do.
2007-10-16 12:19:24 · answer #7 · answered by nbuck11 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
"i never like his attitude myself." It has nothing to do with YOU. What you liked or don't like about him is not pertinent to THEIR relationship. All you can do is be supportive and stop trying to analyze HER reasons for doing what she CHOOSES to do. Also YOUR opinion of the other woman has nothing to do with any of this...keep it to yourself.
2007-10-16 17:23:45 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Just offer your support. Stay out of it though, this is hard enough. Only offer opinions when she asks.
2007-10-16 12:14:11 · answer #9 · answered by Roland'sMommy 6 · 1⤊ 2⤋