over the summer i went to visit my best friend (who is also my ex bf) and all of our mutual friends talked alot of sh*t about it behind my back but were nothing but smiles to my face. i went down to visit him in july (he moved 300 miles away in may) and i just found out about the gossiping recently. he is coming up this weekend and even though i would give anything to see him i do not want to be around our "friends" who talked so much trash..they obv arent my friends (or his) if they would say stuff behind both our backs so im stuck. if i hang out with them they will talk crap cuz the only reason id be there is to see him and they all know it (i havent spoken to them since i found out everything) but i do want to see him cuz hes my best friend...if i dont hang out he is going to ask why...should i tell him what people were saying or should i take the heat and pretend its my fault im not hanging out?
2007-10-16 03:39:28 · 24 answers · asked by jennybean7985 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
75% of the crap that was talked was about him which is what i would have told him cuz i feel like he should know what his "friends" are saying when hes not around but i also dont want to be accused of starting drama cuz thats not my goal..i would want someone to tell me what was being said about me so id hope he would want the same...grrr i HATE drama!! :(
2007-10-16 03:50:37 · update #1
don't lie to your friend, but tell him the truth.
you are right, these people talking behind your backs are not friends.
take care of YOU. i'm sure there are others out there who are friends, and who accept you for the person you are.
2007-10-16 03:43:14 · answer #1 · answered by letterstoheather 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'd say neither. People are going to talk. It's never going to change. So let them. Why should it upset you? It can't change anything in your life that's worth having, believe me on that. So let them have their gossip and fun, and if anything or anyone is lost over it, consider it a good thing that it was lost in this way and you didn't actually have to put any effort into getting rid of them. A very wise woman once told me that "Rumors and gossip cannot cost you anything that's worth having. The people that really know you, know you better than to believe it, the ones who don't and do believe this aren't worth your time to start with. Their loss. Not mine." I believe this with my whole heart, and wouldn't you know, I've never had a problem like this.
2007-10-16 10:54:03 · answer #2 · answered by bonnieboobabe 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no u should tell him teh truth about what they were saying then u can get the stress off ur shoulders. then let him know that ur willing to still hang out wit him n those people... but ur not ganan feel too comfortable and they arent his real friends if they would tlak **** behind both of ur backs. but then c what he has to say and if he is truly ur best friend he will say that u 2 can hang out by urselves and find suttin else to do..if he doesnt say that and he insists on hanging out with them still then thats when u kno that he either doesnt beleive u or he just doesnt care and in that case i would talk to him about that too...
2007-10-16 10:46:50 · answer #3 · answered by shortii47 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First if he is truely your best friend then you should be able to discuss everything. Who are these people that talk about him so much? Are they really your friends? Friends don't bad mouth your friends. As you get older you realize that the people you think are your friends really aren't. So determine who is more important your best friend or these other people.
2007-10-16 10:46:49 · answer #4 · answered by Lady 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him, if he is your friend then he will help you get through it. Anyway, ignore the rest of them, if you want to hang out with your friend, then fine, do so. Don't be controlled by what other people think,
2007-10-16 10:42:35 · answer #5 · answered by Lola 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you sure a hell don't need that kind of friends, they're not even friends if they can't respect you don't waste your time.
just tell your best friend the situation ,be honest and he's such a great friend and respects you he'll underestand he needs to know ,don't leave him out let him what kind of "friends" he has too.
he'll appreciate you even more for your honesty.
call him up give him heads up tell him what's going on and how it makes you feel ,best friends stick together remember that
2007-10-16 10:55:25 · answer #6 · answered by Paul 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Tell him. He's your best friend right? Best friends tell each other everything. If its about him, he deserves to know because he doesn't need to be hanging out with people who aren't his friends and neither do you. So tell him.
2007-10-16 11:36:44 · answer #7 · answered by ♥Brunette Babe♥ 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hang out with ur best frind. obiously these people are not your friends if they are speaking behind your back... dont think what will they say cause people have a mouth so that they can speak n not because they have something good to say........ can u aford to lose a good friend for some many for ur backstabbing friends???????
2007-10-16 10:45:31 · answer #8 · answered by Pridi 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would hang out with him still,if u2 are best friends who cares what ANYONE thinks.And if you didnt say or do anything wrong...Why not tell him?
2007-10-16 10:43:08 · answer #9 · answered by Gemini 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him. If they are talkin trash about the both of you, he should probably know, that way he can decide if he wants to associate himself with those people, also he can confront them if he wants to.
2007-10-16 10:42:54 · answer #10 · answered by Kamunyak 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋