How long should i let my wife give me cold shoulder?

Question

My wife got mad at me yesterday because for the 1st time ever I told her to go visit her Mom without me .. I always go but wanted a day here at home alone ..to myself...we have been married less then a yr and not once have we been apart other then work..since I told her to go without me she said she wouldn't go and hasn't spoke to me won't even stay in same room ..except last night when she got out of bed to sleep away from me she told me what she thought about me ..and how i let her down by not going ...Honest I am getting upset more and more by the minute and starting to think if I want out of this marriage ... so can someone tell me how long should I let her treat me this way

also I have tried to talk to her about it and she simply told me that when she left her 1st husband of 17yrs that she left him because he wouldn't go to her moms the day she walked out

Answer 1

It seems that both of you have some real problems if you are willing to give up on a marriage over such a small matter. You both need to communicate to each other as to why its so important for each of you. And then perhaps compromise and agree to go every second time, so you both have some of your own way, but neither has to totally do without. That is after all what marriage is supposed to be, a lot of give and take.

Answer 2

I can understand where your coming from. I go visit my father without my husband. I believe her feeling got hurt, because she feel you don't want to be with her. But I believe if you give her 24hr. Apologize for hurting her feeling, and that's it. You are entitled to some time to your self. It's early in your marriage, this is a time of getting to know each other and each others ways. I should know I've been married for 22 years. My husband use to get up set with me for the same thing. It will work out, give it time. Let her know every now and then that you need some time to your self and You Love Her.

Answer 3

your wife is being unreasonable, but so are you if you want out of the marriage for such a small thing! im still in my first year of marriage so i know how hard it can be, let her calm down and talk about it and be honest, you need to set bounderies me and my hubby we wont go to bed on a argument no matter how long it takes, make a rule that you give each other time to cool down the talk untill its sorted even if nothings acheved the air will be cleared.
just say i love you and i really like your mum, but she needs time withyou on your own and i honestly i would love an hour or two on my own just doing man stuff. just read the additional bit if your wife just got divorced before because of that then she is immature and selfish, marriage is about comprise not i say you do! i think its time for a prober chat, no wonder your doubting your marriage if she did it before

Answer 4

Whoa! Cool down and remember you are in your first year of marriage and these fights are bound to happen. Sit your wife down and explain it is perfectly reasonable to want some time to yourself. Ask her if she can respect that. She will probably say "yeah, I guess". Then ask her if there is anything that she needs, since sometimes you need time alone. That way you are addressing your issue and asking if she has any issues to bring up that maybe you haven't thought of. Communication is important. If she can't understand that sometimes you need a little space or time alone, or she won't admit that she can understand, then you will have a tough time. Believe me, I have been with my husband for 13 years and that is not an unreasonable request.

Answer 5

This sounds like more her problem than yours. I think it's reasonable to expect that you don't have to go everywhere, every waking moment with your spouse. So you wanted a day at home alone, what's the big deal. Let her give you the cold shoulder until she comes to her senses and realizes that she's being a big baby about the whole thing. Her saying she left her husband of 17 years for the same thing.....that's psycho.....

Stick to your guns or she'll have your nads in her purse....

Answer 6

i do that sometimes when im mad too.just give her some room and let her cool off,you could also say something along the lines of " when youre ready we can talk about it"..and when you are both ready,just let her know that you love her and her family very much,but you just needed some alone time.dont let something like this get in the way of the marriage,trust me ive been married a long time,and if you both love each other you will work it out,the first couple of years are a bit hard but well worth it.

Answer 7

She needs to grow up and quit pouting like a child! How old is she? When you have disagreements you set down together and work it out where you both feel good about the outcome. You are on the same team and want what is best for each other. Come to an agreement that works for both of you!

Answer 8

Try ignoring her. I know it seems petty and childish but as soon as she sees that her silent treatment isn't affecting you, she'll stop. Then, after you both calm down you can speak rationally about the situation. (Although, with no disrespect meant towards your wife, I don't know how rational you can be with a woman who left her husband of 17 years for not going to mommy's, but you need to try.)

I would certainly try and seek some marriage counseling. She needs to know that the silent treatment is never the best way to deal with your issues and that marriage is about giving and taking, not one person always getting their own way.

Good Luck

Answer 9

You dont want to get out of marriage over such small issues.
Try talking to her and tell her how you feel. Let her know that as much as you want to go with her, you want to be by yourself for a day. She will understand. Take some flowers and say a really sweet "Sorry". Tell her that you feel miserable when the two of you dont communicate. She will understand.

Answer 10

it relatively is through fact she is waiting for the 2nd until you hit the set off into the small yet petty combat and then the subject comes out, it ought to be so undemanding as socks on the floor, that would be the set off. females, unlike adult men, can't communicate promptly , so as that they supply the impact of being for a around approximately thank you to do it, and triggers are it, you be attentive to it while a combat brews that doubtless comes out of no the place in my opinion i pass away such relationships, as i'm no longer able to tolerate the stupid concepts video games ( no i'm no longer able to nor can i ever examine you concepts ) and here set off turn fights i recommend you do the comparable and locate somebody greater greater advantageous at communique