My husband has been wearing my underwear and shoes when im at work?

Question

I know this because they are in different places all the time , should I confront him about it ?

Answer 1

There are some things that you, as a woman living in a modern Western country, can never understand, because nothing is forbidden to you. Your husband, by a social convention over which he has no control, is denied certain things.

Go to a busy shopping centre, and keep your eyes open all the time. Look, really look, at clothes in stores, and look at clothes people are wearing. Look at women's outer clothing and look at men's outer clothing. Look at women's underwear and then look at men's underwear. Look at women's nightwear and look at men's pyjamas. (Is it really any wonder so many men prefer to sleep naked, or in just underwear?) And ask yourself the question, how do you think you would feel if you had to wear nothing but men's clothing, every day for the rest of your life? How long could you handle that for? Because that's EXACTLY what it's like for men!

Don't just try to rationalise it by saying "but men are different": the human DNA strand has 23 chromosome pairs, and only ONE chromosome is different between the sexes. What sort of test would you fail by getting 45 correct answers out of 46? Men and women are more similar than you think.

It's not your husband's fault he's a bloke. He's still full of the same natural instinctive curiosity that made the first humans get down from the trees and walk on two legs; the same natural instinctive curiosity that drove us from staring at the moon, wondering what it was, to standing on its surface. And really, when you look at all the terrible things going on in the world, he hasn't really done anything really wrong ..... but nonetheless, he's almost certainly going to be seriously embarrassed when he finds out that you've found out. Have you got secrets from him? Is there something that you'd die if he knew? Then you already know what you're playing with.

Your husband isn't necessarily a transsexual, not that there's anything wrong with that, but it usually manifests early in life; and he's almost certainly no gayer than you are. He's just experimenting with breaking social norms in a controlled fashion, just to see what happens. Chances are he'll get over it in his own time, once he realises it's not that big a deal.

We live in times where everything is over-analysed and everyone is trying to look deeper and deeper down inside everything for reasons, but not everything has to happen for a reason. So don't necessarily take it as a sign that there is anything wrong with your sex life or anything. His curiosity is getting the better of him, is all. Remember, Society At Large wouldn't bat an eyelid if you went out in men's clothing (and, be brutally honest with yourself, you wouldn't enjoy it; it'd be itchy and uncomfortable, and the best part would be taking it off afterward) but it's created this whole artificial taboo about men wearing women's clothing. And the longer you think about it, the less sense it makes; but it's not going to go away in a hurry, and while it's there it has to be dealt with. Some people manage to spend their whole lives not thinking about it, some people keep their experiments to themselves. A few manage to share it with a supportive partner.

If you do bring the matter up, realise that you're most probably going to sound like his mother talking to him about condoms ..... which is never good, whether it's the "what the hell is this doing in your wallet?!" condom lecture or the "OK, son, now you're old about enough to be having sex you really ought to wear a rubber Johnny when you do it" condom lecture.

The good news is that *if* you manage to deal with this properly, you probably will end up enjoying some fantastic, raw, uninhibited sex.

Answer 2

Yes you should but be nice about it. If I were you I would just start making comments like this is so odd. I have been noticing that stuff in my underwear draw has been moved and my shoes are never in the same place. See what he says. See what happens over the next following days. Does the same thing happen or stop.

Answer 3

Confront? That seems so confrontational...

Why don't you just have a chat. If it's too embarrassing to start the conversation, just put some of your underwear in his drawer with a note: "Can we talk? :) " Don't forget the smiley icon--it's important!

Be nice--he's probably horribly embarrassed by the whole thing.

Answer 4

How badly do you want to know the answer? You might hear something you don't want to hear. I personally would confront him. Could he be a closet transsexual or transgender? And...would it bother you if he was? You better think about this before you ask him so you're not shocked when he answers you or embarrass him any further.

Answer 5

Maybe next time you are out shopping with him have a stroll round the underwear dept with a smile ask him if you could get him some bits in his size

Answer 6

something previous, something new, something borrowed, something blue. you also may have a "sixpence on your shoe". that is a prepare for luck. you may want to obviously opt for your wedding ceremony gown, and any horny undies below it, in conserving consisting of your selection :) A garter is a chilled element besides. also a veil, in case you need! also, any rings that you opt for to placed on. many times the bride wears her engagement ring and the marriage band is slipped onto her finger in the course of the ceremony. shoes are also oftentimes a robust idea, residences are maximum smooth although that is regardless of you want! wish this helps!

Answer 7

What you need to do before confronting him is to get some pic's of him and send them to his work mates, his family and probably the local newspaper that should put an end to it.

Answer 8

Depends on how important your marriage is to you?

Any children? How long married? Didn't you have any inkling at all of his predilection for this, before you were married?

What a quandary. I would suggest, if you can afford it, contact a good marriage counselor, and discuss it with them before YOU DO ANYTHING.

Good luck,

Wotan

Answer 9

yes you should wow im very sorry about this os set up a trap like sel some under wear a serten way or a shoe and see if it's that was when you come home omg that sucks

Answer 10

Take him shopping with you. Take him into an underwear shop and ask him to choose something nice. Then ask him if he wants one in his size. You don't want him stretching all your nice things, if he must wear it get him to get his own.