So my parents have decided to get back together after the third time they seperated and im not happy about ...

Question

They actually got all the papers and stuff this time. My mom just told me she is going back to my dad. I cant tke this anymore! This has happended three times what makes her think this times going to be any different. I keep getting my life flipped up side down! When they were together my mom acted so depressed and my dad always yelled and told her to leave, they didnt even sleep in the same bed together.Me and my siblings were sad when she told us they were going to get a divorce and she said shes never going back and its over for real this time, i took it hard and sucked it up, i got used to our life now she throws this crap in my face! I cant take this much longer..im really hating my life right now. And all my aunts and uncles knew she was going to go back noone belived that this was real, i guess they were right.

oh sorry. that wasnt really a question. Advice?

Its gotten to the point where i dont believe this is actually happening. I though they were done for real this time.

Answer 1

If I were you I'd ask my mother to think twice before getting back together with your dad. I feel for you because I'm a dad who had to suffer watching his child and step children go through a number of split-ups and I've decided it would be a continuation of a sick cycle to get back together again with my Ex. It's really weird how people like my Ex and I and (it seems) your parents can easily forget the really bad events that led up to all of the splits.
I can tell you that my Ex has started her insane sweet treatment of me now that we've been separated and had our divorce papers signed by the judge. There's no way I'm putting my kids through that hell again. I'm never going back.
I would suggest you and your mom go to therapy together and put all the cards on the table. Let your mom know exactly how you feel and do it in front of a therapist so you have a sane third party listening.
Adults are a strange breed who can get themselves into some really terrible abuse patterns. They can't see how they hurt other family members who they love. They can't even see how they allow themselves to stay in abusive relationships. They just get caught in a useless hope for an otherwise hopeless situation. You are right to feel the way you do and you should help your mom sort through a tough reality. You may be getting some help at the same time. I'm sure you have some pent up issues that you need to heal from.
I feel bad for you but if you stay strong you and your mom can get through it.
Hang in there.

Answer 2

When will you be 18? When you turn 18 move out - I'm serious, too. Get a job and make a go of it on your own, before your nerves crash and burn. Learn from your mom's mistakes and don't repeat them. This is like a sickness for your momand is not healthy for you or your siblings. You guys need to try to take care of each other as much as you can (the siblings, I mean). You and your siblings need to get some counselling - at your parents' expense - because they are screwing you guys up. They need it more than you guys but they won't help themselves because they are too busy being a mess! I could elaborate on this topic, but won't - suffice it to say that I moved out as soon as I turned 18. Good luck.

Answer 3

You and your siblings need to sit down with your mother and tell her how it is affecting your entire family. Even her siblings and sibling-in-laws agree. If she says that it is for real this time, try to compromise something with her. Tell her that if once again it does not work, you will all be very upset and won't be able to trust her anymore. If she takes your advice and stays without your father, then try to help her find new love which will make everyone's lives a whole lot better. Don't make her do anything just try to guide her way threw leading a happy life.

Good Luck to you and your family [= <3

Answer 4

On again off again relationships are a hard cycle to break. I know because I have been in them with all my ex's it seems. It's an emotional high when you get back together, similar to a new relationship high. You feel a renewed sense of optimisim even though you know it's more than likely not going to work the "high" you are experiencing makes it all worth it. Trust me she knows the odds are not good I only hope that it is not an abusive relationship.

Answer 5

Your parents are going through a tough time right now, though they are being very inconsiderate of your feelings. You need to let them know how you feel about this. Also, it might help if you talk to your school counselor about your feelings. Divorce and other problems in a family don't just affect the parents, it affects the children to...let them know that. Maybe one day they will grow up.

Answer 6

Your parents certainly have issues Summer, but you don't need to have them. Arrange to speak with your school Counselor, who may refer you to another person so you can learn that this is not your problem, and help you discover ways to deal with the chaos. You might want to include your siblings too. Maybe Mom and Dad might see the wisdom in therapy for everybody. Best of luck!!

Answer 7

First of all, you should probably be happy that your parents are back together. Right now is probably just a phase of shock you are going through. Have a heart to heart with your mother or father and tell them how you feel, and that you want them to stay together. Explain that they take each argument too far if it always leads to divorce.

Answer 8

I would diffently explain to the both of your parents how disfunctional that their actions have made your life. Go through scenero's of how this will be the 3rd time they have gotten back together and ask them "if you have gotten back together the number of times you have what makes you think that this time its going to work". I would also incoorperate the support from your family members that know the situation. Good luck honey and most importantly just pray that God will see you through all.

Answer 9

Each person has his own good and bad quality. We human being has come to live together so as to protect us from wild animals, to gather food and shelter. In this way families are made. One family help the other. Helping neighbours is always good rather than quarreling. In the time of need we help each other. After third divorce your parents want again to stay together.

This shows their love and want for eachother.

It is better if parents unite. You can act a motivator for both of them. Try help to your father and mom both. Try to prevent them from arguing and quarrels by showing them your concern. Love your parents in so many ways that they will be proud of you. Also try to show your anger when they fights.
I think it is much better when you have both. Every person has his quality. It will be better if you show them their good qualities and prove them that they will be much better living together without giving divorce and try to adjust with eachother. Societies are made with the help of families. People live together to help eachother otherwise they would have lived in forest.

Answer 10

You and your siblings need to get together and either sit both of your parents down (together) or write them a letter. You need to explain to them how selfish and irresponsible they are being. It is not just their lives that they are confusing, but yours! And that is not right. Tell them that any decision they make would be much easier and less stressful for you kids. But they HAVE to make a decision. Dragging your emotions around is a terrible and selfish thing for them to do.