how to stop people shortening names?

Question

have any of you had problems with people shortening your childs name when you dont want them to? did you confront them or do you accept it? I like the names Tomas and Alexander but don't like them shortened to Tom and Alex. How can you stop people shortening them, or cant you?

I really like the names but if its inevitable that they will be shortened then i dont want to use them, except as maybe a middlename

Answer 1

You may be able to get your family and friends to call them by the original version, but as your child gets older his friends are going to start shorting his name, unless he objects. I know how you feel though, because I love the name Jacob, but don't care for Jake. I will never use the name because of the shorting reason.

I agree middle names are different. We are going to use Alexander for our next son.

Answer 2

It's actually very common for today's classically-named children to use the full version, rather than a nickname. Much more the norm than it would have been a generation or two ago (remember all the Mikes, Matts, Beckys and Nikkis? LOL). So as far as friends, school and other parents are concerned, you're fairly safe. Generally, whatever you refer to your child as or however he introduces himself will determine what others call him, and if you use the formal version, most will easily follow suit.

I've noticed that the older generations are more apt to try and shorten a name without hearing the child or parents do so first. My own grandparents find it odd if a Margaret or Patrick (for example) are not called Maggie and Patty or some other pet form. LOL But really, it's not that big a deal if you only have to remind the grandparents or occasional elderly woman in the store, know what I mean? ;) In general, it won't be an issue.

Really, the only potential problem with wanting to use the full name is the possibility that your son may one day grow to like one of the nicknames. LOL If you're fine with it as long as it's his choice -- rather than simply being assumed by every person he meets (it really shouldn't be) -- then you're good. If, on the other hand, you dislike them to the point that his wanting to be called Alex 17 years from now will still irk you, perhaps it's best to avoid them. ;)

Answer 3

A good way to show people that you want your children to be Thomas and Alexander is simply by using those names around them. If others hear you use them, they are likely to follow by example. You can simply tell them that you want them called by their full name - no nicknames. This can be done. I know Victorias and Elizabeths and so on that go by their full name only.

But, there is always a chance that they will be shortened. Your children might even decide that they want a nickname. You cannot stop them from doing so, but you have the right to call them by the name you gave them.

I am not a huge fan of nicknames, that is why I tend to steer clear of them in the first name spot. I like your idea of using them as middle names. I have a lot of names that I would only use as a middle name because of this reason.

Answer 4

I have this problem with my name - a lot of people do it and I dont like my name shortened - some sound good - mine doesnt - a lot of close friends or people I have known for a long time do it and I dont mind TOO much but when I have just met someone and they do it, it really annoys me - it is too familiar. I have taken to saying when I meet someone new (in response to them introducing themselves) 'Hi nice to meet you, im *****, you can call me ***** " they usually look confused and say somthing like "as opposed to what" and I will say "as opposed to **** - I dont like my name shortened" but I alwways do it with a big friendly smile and a laugh in my voice so they know I am not being rude or anything, its just personal prefernace - everyone I have done this with always calls me my full name and has never had a problem with it! Maybe you could say "This is little Alexander/I am going to call my baby boy, I love the full name Alexander but its always the risk it will get shortened to Alex dont you think" and they will hopefully pick it up and take the hint!

Answer 5

Choose a first name with one syllable Cole, Stan, Lance (i.e) and use Tomas or Alezander as the middle name. As hard as you try someone is bound to shorten the name some time or another and your child might even like a nickname. So one syllable would be the way to go--can't do much to shorten Cole!!!!

Answer 6

My real name can not be shortened. It has five letters in it. The best thing to do is give your child a short name in the first place which can't be shorten.

Answer 7

Well, I know a girl named Katherine and nobody calls her Kate or Katie. When your child is being introduced be sure to say this is "Katherine" and always call her that. If YOU use nicknames around the house when the friends are around, they will pick up on it and begin using it. If she always writes her name as Katherine, teachers will call her that and that will be enforced upon other classmates. The same goes with the name William. :) I'm not a fan of most nicknames either! Good luck <3

Answer 8

Yeah, nicknames happen, at least Alex and Tom don't lend themselves to bullies that easily. I'm Kathryn and I get Kath, Kat, Kathy, Kit-kat, Katarina (Spanish teacher), Katrine (French teacher), Katrina, Kate, Kay, everything you can think of, and also Tipper I don't know anyone who doesn't have at least one nickname whether it's shortening, lengthening or anything else so I think you pretty much just have to deal and let the child pick what they like. Just make sure their intials don't spell anything awful and you should be ok.

Answer 9

You can't stop people shortening names. Even picking short names doesn't stop them being messed with - if you called your son Tom you can guarantee most of his friends will call him Tommy. One of my sons has a short name everyone says -y at the end of, the other has a longer name everyone shortens. You can't fight it....

Answer 10

You can't it's been happening since time began. I always use my children's full names, but one shortened it himself, and some of his friends have - so you can't win. Better to find a shortend name you like. Even so I call one son, named John - Johnny or Jonathon so it works the other way too they could get lenthened !! Silly isn't it ?

Nice to see you like normal sort of names, not something weird.