Why are the women mean to me?

Question

I'm new to this church and some women were nice to me at first. I talked to everyone when the service is over or when there are church activities. Some of the husbands and other women would come up to me to talk and to welcome me to the church. But lately....Some of the wives give me mean looks when their husband do. Lately some men that use to say hi just ignore me now. I'm a really nice person. I mean...I don't go up to them...they came up to me and talk. Was I suppose to me rude and not talk?? Did I do anything wrong? I mean I know my boundries and know they are married men and I don't even flirt or anything! Now I don't feel like attending church but I do anyway...for me. I like friends :(

Answer 1

Miss, try not to take it personally. Often I have been alienated by other women simply due to their inability to get over themselves. You seem to pose a threat to them. Whether it be because you are attactive, or single, or without children, have a great job, etc. I have had this happen in the workplace as well as social situations. They try to bring you down because you represent what they are not...or what they wish to be. Try joining a women's group at the church. If this behavior continues after they get to know you better, I think you would be better off finding a new place to worship. Church is supposed to be a place of renewal and peace, not a source of irritation. Best wishes to you!

Answer 2

It sounds as if the men and women that have turned against you have had a little "discussion" about you at home. If you are an attractive young woman, wives will see you as a threat. Married men will be afraid to talk to you, as their wives are watching their every move around you. Your best bet is to tone down any dress or make-up that might accentuate your looks (yeah, it's unfair, but it will do the job), and to try to cozy up to the women in the church by attending female-only bible studies and social organizations. These women are threatened by you. You need to let them know that stealing their husbands is not your angle. Once that is established, you can join other groups that are not gender-specific. Being attractive can actually have its detriments, and you have illustrated one of them quite well. Just play along until you gain everyone's trust, and you should be okay (even though it may be inconvenient for you. In the long run, playing to other's insecurities will serve you well. It isn't fair, but it's the only way to get beyond the social expectations of both sexes).

Answer 3

Speak to the pastor of your church and see what he has to say other then that find a new church to go to , I know from growing up in 12 religions , women dont just start disliking someone unless they have done something to deserve it , maybe your halo is around your ankle's not above your head as you would wish us to believe?

The whole point of Question's and Answer's is having a place we can come and vent our problems , ask for help and take on board the advice given and be able to process the BS from the real people wanting to help the situation , while not all Question'ers actually heed the advice after processing it and use it to make their live's less stressful and more comfortable / manageable a lot of people do actually move on after the advice is given.

For this question I am afraid even though it may get me many thumbs down , I feel that this question is not real.

Answer 4

Church is full of unaccepting people for some reason....??

It doesn't makes sense does it??

If you want to keep going, make sure you are a modest dresser and don't talk with the men that are married at all, directly or if they are with a group.

I don't feel that anyone ought to change himself to be accepted and loved by good hearted people tho.. ya know?

Very contradictory stuff religion can be.

Good luck to you.

xxoxooxoxo

Answer 5

You don't mention your maritual status. If you are single they obviously feel threatened by you. Ridiculous considering Church is supposed to be a place of worship and friendship.

It must be isolating and hurtful for you. Ride through the hipocracy and you will see, your perseverence and natural ability in making friends will win them over.

Good luck. It is not a nice feeling being the "odd one out" i wish for you all the best.

Answer 6

That sounds weird. If you haven't flirted or anything, then I don't know. My church isn't like that, we are all friendly, but we are small as well, about 100. I always talk to everyone, men and women, single and married. No one minds, because they know me. Maybe they just don't know you well enough and are mistaking your outgoing nature for something else? Or maybe your skirt was too short for them? I dunno. You should probably just go to at least one who is the least unfriendly to you and ask tactfully if anything is wrong.

Answer 7

they are prob jealous of you that is why most women act like that and you are coming into there church and they have already formed there little group of friends you know how most women are gossiping about the new person owell dont let them get to you you arent going there just because they are there it will turn out ok you dont want ppl like that for friends anyways atleast i know i wouldnt

Answer 8

Ask the women why they are mean to you. However, perhaps you don't want to be friends with these people if they are mean to you for no reason or without getting to know you first. Be friends with civilized people.

Answer 9

Find a new church or new friends..God doesnt care if you go to church he just want you to be happy

Answer 10

According to Jerry Lawler, all women secretly hate each other.

In churches, you can multiply that hate x 2 and add a pint of jealousy.