2007-10-14 15:41:02 · 14 answers · asked by Joeyboy 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Let me preface this with the fact that I am generally loathe to read self help books or listen to the psycho babble spewed forth on daytime television and talk radio.
Go get a copy of the book "How do I get through to You" by Terrance Real. It'll teach you to communicate with your wife instead of trying to change her by force.
I had very similar feelings in my marriage that you are going through and spent much energy trying to rectify the situation. It got so bad that I spent a couple months either traveling on business or sleeping in the guest room and avoiding her when I was home.
Out of desperation, I read this book, learned a new way to talk to her, and things got better. It basically teaches you how to see things from her perspective and bring your concerns to light accordingly.
2007-10-14 17:07:32 · answer #1 · answered by towknie1 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Okay you either A. Cut her *** loose( just a lil scare of course lol) or B fight fire with fire and act just as "inconsiderate" as she does I mean it will only be fair. Then you can always go with the one to one "talk" and see where that goes...but ultimately YOU can't change a person. You can only pave the way and allow them to take the walk.
2007-10-14 16:05:16 · answer #2 · answered by actress18 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well,you can't change her. But there is a thing called compromise. You and her have to come to some agreement on whatever you and her are fighting about. You and her are human and both of you are not always right about everything. So at this point both of you have to come to a compromise.
2007-10-14 16:13:49 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Are you God? U can't make a person change himself/herself unless u offer him/her a million bucks. Change is a freewill. It is he/she u has this pust button option to change. U can be an instrument or an influence but that doesn't mean u are responsible for all of that. geeee........
2007-10-14 15:58:38 · answer #4 · answered by hormels_gun 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you argue a lot, maybe it's time for marriage help if both of you want to learn how to communicate in a saner, more calm manner.
Arguing doesn't help... people have disagreements, yes... but a lot? That's not normal.
Maybe think therapy.
2007-10-14 15:48:40 · answer #5 · answered by letterstoheather 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You can never change anyone. You two should learn to communicate better and be heard. Try and make her understand how you feel and vice versa.
2007-10-14 15:48:51 · answer #6 · answered by Romi 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
One of the unwritten rules, is that you cannot change people.
You can only change yourself, & your reaction to others.
What you can do, is catch her doing something you like;
then make a big fuss, telling her how you appreciated that.
Pointing out what you consider a fault will not change it.
Model the kind of considerate behaviour you expect.
2007-10-14 15:47:42 · answer #7 · answered by Robert S 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Just be nice and dont fight back, fight evil with good.
2007-10-14 15:51:21 · answer #8 · answered by tommy 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You sound so sensitive. I am sure you are not in anyway part of this problem and she is fully to blame.
2007-10-14 15:54:55 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Start acting like her and see how she likes it!
2007-10-14 15:57:03 · answer #10 · answered by gloria b 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋