Love after 50?

Question

Hi. I have this class assignment which I'm suppose to interview adults or couples who are over 50 years old about their views on intimate relationship (you don't have to be in a relationship to answer this. you can be around 50 years old--that's fine).

It's just a few questions. Please state your sex and age too.

Thank you so much in advance!!


1. How do you feel that love has changed as you have grown older?
2. Does love change as the relationship ages? If so, how?
3. Looking back what would you change knowing what you know about how you negotiated love and intimacy?
4. What is the best advice you could give a young person about how to negotiate love and intimacy in the first decade of the 21st century?

Answer 1

M, 50, married.

1. For me, no, but my partner has grown more secure.
2. Usually. Security and faith grow if respect remains, and fewer games are played to test each other.
3. I never negotiated love and intimacy. It is or it isn't.
4. Love can carry a price, but never your own self respect. If you give up that, you can't get the love you desire. You may get an illusionary substitute, but not love for yourself, because giving up your self respect means becoming someone other than who you are.

Answer 2

1) Personality means more than looks.
2) Constantly. Early 20's--dreams 30-4--stability
40-5--fear of being alone Over 50--dreams.
3) Looks change-personality evolves.
4)Marriage is mainly a business-you have a house to run, decisions about children, income vs expenditures. Love and intimacy are the beginning, but the lifetime is maintaining love and intimacy with a business partner.

I'm a tad over 50.

Answer 3

You are probably a nosy 20-something or a younger guy considering a mature woman, but OK, here goes~

1. Love changes over time as one becomes aware of the various types of love, phases of love and how it is affected by outside forces. This is a good thing. One then masters the art of dealing with these so-called problems and your love life actually improves!

2. Yes, love matures. It matures in sync with our bodies and the phases of life. I am speaking from the perspective of one who is married to someone that is fairly close to my own age.

3. Nothing. I believe we all learn by trial and error. However, one may say that I'm a woman ahead of my time, in that iniation has never been an issue with me. That does not mean I have no morality problems. I would go so far to say that a secure woman probably has high moral standards and is therefore, somewhat fearless about what she expects from life.

4. My best advice to a young person at this time is the same thats' been given for centuries. "To thine own self be true". Your instincts will seldom lead you astray. Yet, in this day of AIDS/HIV, and the myriad of sexual diseases that are beginning to threaten the human specie, it is imperative that one adopt safe practices. The ideal would be a return to the monogamy of marriage and to remain faithful within those confines. Abstinence and/or celebecy (sp) should not be treated as a form of social dysfunction, as they are currently being considered. It is a choice, generally made by educated minds. After navigating these waters, one may then find themselves in love and an intimate relationship. How to negotiate it is face-to-face. Not by using contrivances (such as computers), but a genuine face to face encounter. Some things never change. And others should never have changed.

Age: 50
Gender: F

Answer 4

Look for healthy relationships, stop making excuses for other people, "He's just the silent type" when really he has problems expressing himself or communicating.

Hold off, wait, get to know someone, be lonely once in a while, it won't kill ya. Have a strong, strong women support team of friends and relatives so you don't "need" a guy.
Have a career before you start a family. Promise not to play power games if you do get divorced- focus on the kids.
Have similar child rearing methods.Take time to "date" within a marriage

Answer 5

Female. age 60. Yes. It takes time to really no your partner,To be honest with each other,care about each others needs. I would not change a thing. I would tell young people not to get in a hurry, and take there time to chose the right person.

Answer 6

1, not believing everything your told
2, yes..not it is not all about the moment but the future
3,if you can not talk openly.. then leave it alone
4,get to know the person and not rush into it.. give love time to grow.... fla.. and not 50 i am 43.. but made a lot of mistakes

Answer 7

,I've learned that it's grown with me.
Yes, it matures, it gets deeper.
Don't ever change yourself.
,Love and Cherish and Respect yourself.If you don't how do you expect anyone else to?
Female 49 Married 32 years