let him? Do you like it. My husband and I had a conversation about this. He thinks about 60% of wives do it and like it. I think probably less. Got an opinion? Let's try not to get deleted here.
2007-10-14 13:48:26 · 32 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I was really trying not to spell it out. But I meant anal.
2007-10-14 13:51:15 · update #1
I enjoy non traditional sex and traditional sex. We have a very active sex life and enjoy being with each other even after 4 kids and 18 years of marriage. It's important to spice things up, try new things and explore with each other as long as both of you are comfortable. We don't do anal all the time, but more like once in awhile.
Anal sex when done right can be great. You need special lube and you need to relax. Don't use regular KY jelly it doesn't work as well for anal. Adam and Eve sells a great lube just for anal. And there needs to be boundaries... Such as he has to follow your directions, if you say stop he stops,if you say slow down he does, if you change your mind he stops. First have him start with a condom on his finger, playing around then add two fingers etc. Before getting right down to it. There should always be a LOT of foreplay. One trick to it is when he is starting to enter you slightly push down like having a bowel movement and it will be easier for more comfortable for him to enter. Have him go slowly. You also should only do it when you don't have poop in your rectum. You can insert a finger into your vagina and feel the post anterior wall of your vagina. The wall between your rectum and your vagina is very thin, you can feel through the vaginal wall if you have feces in your rectum. Obviously this needs to be clear BEFORE you have anal sex. Otherwise it is not going to be pleasant for anyone. :)
It's also important to know that men who like anal with women isn't a sign they are gay. Otherwise they would want to have anal with a guy NOT a girl. Anal sex has been enjoyed by heterosexual couples for hundreds of years, it's nothing 'new'. It's just talked about more these days.
There are some great articles on it at the website www.talksexwithsue.com she has a great show on the oxygen channel as well. She's a nurse and is not afraid to discuss any subject. The website is really informative about sex of all kinds.
Most of the women I know feel the same way about sex. But you can't compare your relationship to others because you have your own boundaries, everyone is different. You should never do anything you don't feel comfortable doing. A loving partner will respect that.
2007-10-14 13:52:58 · answer #1 · answered by Wicked Good 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I think that there are many ways to spice up a marriage. Letting a marriage become boring is dangerous to the marriage itself.
I love to be adventurous both in and out of the bedroom. I may go to an Opera just to see what it is all about.... even if I walk out half way through it, at least I went.
I think that researching things about alternative sex practices is fun and if you both get into it.... you may surprise yourselves about what does/does not interest you.
Maybe you like to feel the feather duster gliding over your skin while you are blindfolded. Some couples use ice. There is no 'wrong' or guilt when both are open to new experiences.
I think of these things as trust builders. There is a lot of trust when you allow these things to happen between one another.
2007-10-14 14:44:55 · answer #2 · answered by pink 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Most wives will try it BUT most husbands will not take the proper time to work for it. Anal sex takes some work and while it feels great for the man, for MOST women it takes some getting used to. Of those that try anal, most usually find it to be a pleasuable experience AFTER they get used to it. It is a completely different sensation and orgasm. But he has to be patient and give your mind a chance to over come the hesitancy. Once you have anal sex a few times, then you will probably be okay with it but he has to go real slow in the beginning. If you find it painful and not fun, you will not want to do it anymore.
2007-10-14 14:00:47 · answer #3 · answered by baseballdad69 5 · 2⤊ 2⤋
You said in your additional details that you mean anal and I can understand. This is really painful for some women in the beginning and men don't understand that. Its something that I still can't get use to so I don't try too anymore. Some women enjoy it but I can't. So, when my fiancee ask, I just say sure as long as I can do you too with my dildo and that will always stop the conversation ! LOL
2007-10-14 14:14:46 · answer #4 · answered by concernone 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I will admit I was not up for the idea the first time it was mentioned to me but i trusted him and knew that if i siad no he would stop.
Have something to drink before the first time so you are relaxed and definatly need lube.
Even though i hate to admit it to him it is very presurable once you get used to it and it gives you a totally differnt orgasm.
I know he discusses with his best mates about it and i know that they do it aswell.
As for 60% I think it will be slightly less but there again no one knows what goes on behind closed doors!!!
2007-10-14 14:13:20 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
I would think it is less then 60% if you consider all ages of women having sex from teenagers to older ladies. I think many women enjoy it once they try it and get use to it. Oh you said wives but I still think it is more like 30%. Most women wouldn't admit to doing it though.
2007-10-14 13:55:31 · answer #6 · answered by justme 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
what do you mean by nontraditional? If you're talking about in terms of positions or anal, you have to do what you're both comfortable with. If you really do not like the things he wants to do, you need to tell him that, and he needs to accept it. he cant force the kind of sex he wants on you if you aren't comfortable. all its going to do is make sex less enjoyable for you until it becomes a chore and theres no pleasure at all in it for you. You need to set boundaries and talk openly about what you are and arent comfortable with.
2007-10-14 13:51:42 · answer #7 · answered by colostomy_punch 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I've tried it...I'd do it again if I could find a way to get past the pain. I'm not sure I'd say 60% of married women like it. That seems high to me. I'll try just about anything once, I've been married for 7 years.
2007-10-14 13:53:01 · answer #8 · answered by Katie H 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
well believe it or not but my wife asked me to do anal with her, it all started after i stuck a finger in her backside as i was giving her oral and she had an orgasm real fast and hard. so when she asked me i did it like she wanted me too i listened to her and she loved it and its a regular part of sex for us, i'd say once a month at least. she always has an orgasm like that too, crazy how quick it happens when we do that. now i just ask her if she likes kiebassi in the can. give her two in the pink and one in the stink. have fun
2007-10-14 14:39:47 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I agree with wicked good. I was totally naive to this kind of sex but we tried it and after a few tries we have both enjoy it. It is not for everyone but for those that do and it is done slowly it can be enjoyable.
2007-10-14 14:41:29 · answer #10 · answered by Patty 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋