my husband is away at work every other month, hes at work one month and at home the next month.. its been like that for one year we have been married...he and his brother are best friends and my hubby is older by one year.. brother in law lives in the apartment behind our house. whenever i need help, my hubby said i can just call him and hes always there to help me willingly.. but the problem started recently when i started having dreams about my brother in law and i kissing and making love, it happened many times now and i was disgusted at first.. he was not badlooking, he is more lean than my husband who has gained weight a little bit. now i always look for reason so i could call him in the house like fixing the bulblights, the fone dial tone, the grass cutter, this and that just to see him..i would wear short shorts sometimes and get near him.. i feel horrible doing this to my husband because i know he loves me very much ..what shall i do? i want this stupid fantasy to stop!!!
2007-10-14
12:11:01
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16 answers
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asked by
confused
1
in
Family & Relationships
➔ Marriage & Divorce
You know I think you just miss your husband and you are trying to find comfort elsewhere...and because his brother is the closest you got to your husband right now. Sex dreams most of the time have nothing to do with sex..you are feeling lonley and you want attention from a man right now and since your husbands brother is around i think thats where it is coming from as well..DO NOT act on this and you need to stop before you do something stupid..if you love your husband you will not do anything and you will stop acting like a teenage girl trying to get the boys' attention. Is this worth ruining your marriage over?? But you are gonna do what you want regardless of what we say but if you feel you are gonna cheat you need to divorce your husband because you dont love him as much as you think you do and if you do something b4 you guys seperate then DO NOT do it with his brother..that is family and very wrong..besides most brothers wouldnt do that to their family so you will probably end up looking stupid and he will tell your husband..you need to think nlong and hard about what is important
2007-10-14 12:44:55
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answer #1
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answered by Tiffany R 2
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Do not get involved with your brother n law no matter
what! You never mess up a family in this way. You
will be kicked to the curb because blood is thicker
than water. Not a good idea at all !!! It is normal to
want a man by your side and he is just the one who
happens to be the closest thing to your marriage right
now. Try staying away try to spend more time with
your husband...can you not go with him assuming he
is in another state working since he does not come
home for a month at a time. Talk to your husband
about having issues being apart for that long of a
time. See what you can work out.
2007-10-14 12:46:36
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answer #2
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answered by Plittle 1
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Without playing games, don’t be available 100% of the time or let your life be an open book. A man that comes on too strong or doesn’t have outside interests will scare a woman away just as much as it would if the circumstances were reversed. Read here https://tr.im/FMnsm
Women don’t want to feel as though they are completely responsible for your happiness and that is what it feels like when the other person has no outside interests. Men who are overeager or jump when the woman says jump are the ones who are more likely to end up in the friend zone. This doesn’t mean that you should play the game of not calling for a few days; it means that you should set healthy boundaries until you both naturally find a spot for the other in your lives.
2016-05-17 18:36:52
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answer #3
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answered by ? 2
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By all account you're attracted with your brother in law. Go ahead. Make your 'dreams' come true. You might discover something even more exciting than your present experiences with your husband. Your alibis just to see and be with him always may be good but not enough. Go even further. But the rule is: Don't get caught. Because if you do you're 'stupid fantasy' will send you to jail, if not in hell!!
2007-10-14 13:05:41
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answer #4
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answered by Lei Al 2
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If you are wanting the fantasy to stop you are the one who has to put a stop to it yourself. Stop calling your brother-in-law for the least little thing that happens. If you can do it yourself then do it. Stop depending on the brother-in-law to fix things that are easy to fix. Also stop dressing so sexy. You will end up doing something that you could end up regretting for the rest of your life. Alot of men and women fantasize at some time in their lifes but you should not act on them. I use to fantasize about other men but don't anymore.
2007-10-14 12:42:21
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answer #5
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answered by Nancy M 7
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What is making you think about him all the time? It seems you are developing a crush for him. But for what reason? Are you the kind of person that needs atthention all the time (I don't know)? Be honest with yourself, look into your heart and find out the real reasons as to why you have these feelings whenever your husband is away. Good luck.
2007-10-14 14:13:46
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answer #6
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answered by Anonymous
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When you get these thoughts,
you need to remind yourself of what you have to lose if something were to happen between the 2 of you.
If his brother and him are that close,
I would like to think that his brother won't let anything happen and then you are going to look like the bad one.
Just try putting it out of your mind.
If it's in your dreams,
let it stay there ;)
2007-10-14 12:33:54
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answer #7
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answered by MommaBear 5
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It's normal to develop crushes. It's not normal to try and act on them if you are truly happily married and in love with someone else.
Stop it. You're an adult. You know what you're doing. Quit before you ruin your marriage and/or the relationship between your husband and his brother.
2007-10-14 12:14:39
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answer #8
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answered by Anonymous
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2016-04-24 15:47:34
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answer #9
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answered by Anonymous
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Stop thinking about it. You are being clueless, but you are not powerless. Don't let hormones cloud your vision. Cease inventing excuses to get him over.
You will damage the relationship between him and his brother forever if you don't stop.
2007-10-14 14:02:48
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answer #10
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answered by Anonymous
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