Im 20 (will be 21 in a few days) and my husband is 23. We have been together for a few years and we love eachother so very much! Heres the thing... we are ALL eachother has. Neither of us have any family at all, none what so ever. No parents, aunts, uncles, cousins.. nothing. Its just us. Well my problem is that I think i am too over protective of my husband. I dont like him driving anywhere because im afraid of him possibly getting hurt. So i drive everywhere. He has not driven his car in probably 3 months. When he is at work im afraid he is going to fall off of a roof or a ladder. He has NEVER mentioned anything about me being over protective I just feel like I am. Is this normal? Do i need to relax? If I lose him or if he got hurt i would be destroyed. I just need some advice if Im being a nut or what. Thanks so much
2007-10-14 02:35:48 · 18 answers · asked by afireinsidexxx77 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Sounds like the issue is not really between you and your husband but the problem is with you and whatever unresolved issues you have. we all have issues that affect our relationships. Get help before you drive your husband away and most importantly get help for yourself.
2007-10-18 02:41:13 · answer #1 · answered by lhallums82 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is perfectly understandable why you are so over-protective. You have him and no one else in this life! I cannot imagine what is going to happen when you have a baby :) It is not healthy to be as anxious and overly concerned as you are. Granted, it's understandable, but it's going to end up making you a very miserable and maybe lonely girl in the long run. Can you afford any counseling? It probably wouldn't take much, but I think you're experiencing some serious separation anxiety and it HAS to be worked on right now. Do not wait till you're 40 and still feeling this way, please!! We cannot control our entire lives. Good and bad fall on all of us, and you need a support group of close friends to love you and be there for you so that you're not a crushing weight of anxiety on your husband and children. You all need friends, close ones, who feel like family. I understand your feelings and want you to get help so that you can feel good again. Take care, sweetheart.
2007-10-14 02:42:26 · answer #2 · answered by Aiden 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Well I'm surprised he lets you drive all the time, he must love you. as for being over protective, that is understandable, no one wants to lose a loved one. But in the bigger picture, if and when something does happen, there will be nothing you or anyone else will be able to do about it. Relax you are both young and hopefully happy, you two will live a long time together, unless you smother him and drive him away.
2007-10-14 02:46:25 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't worry, I'm pretty much the same with my fiance. We have family, but we had difficult childhoods and now are not close with them. I am terrorfied that he will hurt himself badly at work, and I watch the local news every night to check for news of car crashes with his car in it. I have absolutly no idea what I would do without him, he is the only friend I have and he is my only real family. He is the other half of me. So I understand where your terror is coming from. If he is anything like my man yours will love that you care so much for him and that you worry. That's what love is all about. You have a beautiful love, and of course you need to protect it. But you need to be more at peace for your own sake, being so stressed and scared is not healthy... plus it must be hard for him to see you so worried all the time. I always try to remember that this life would not bring two halves of one soul together only to take one away.
2007-10-14 03:06:18 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well..taking your situation into account--I'd say it's perfectly normal..well maybe the driving part is going a bit overboard because it doesn't matter who's driving accidents can happen anytime(that's why they're called accidents). The rest I think is all good, but however you should talk to your husband about your feeling--let'em know how you feel, I'm sure it'll jus make'em love you even more knowing how much he means to you....that's something that any man would like to hear his wife say that her world would be destroyed without him
2007-10-14 02:43:16 · answer #5 · answered by I'mAnIdiot! 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hun I'm also over protected with my husband but me i have my reasons in why i should be he has cheated on me but in your situation he is a grown man be there for him but not all of the time let him drive his car you just go with him and enjoy the ride just relax its normal to be afraid of every movement he does trust me i know the feeling i hope my answer helps you a Lil.
2007-10-14 04:25:39 · answer #6 · answered by BLOSSOM 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you are afraid of losing the one solid piece of family you have so you are over protective but that can in time possibly drive him away if it gets to be too much for him.You need to talk to a counselor and learn to not worry about him so much and perhaps he should go as well because he should be reassuring you rather than allowing you to drive him everywhere and so on. You are not being a nut but rather insecure and counseling can help you both with that and make your lives better rather than you worrying all the time.
2007-10-14 02:46:34 · answer #7 · answered by Al B 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Very over protective of my... husband?
2014-12-14 17:46:03 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I really believe you love him and you have him in your best interest, but this could cause you to lose you marriage. You need to loosen up the strings a bit and let him breath. Both of yall are still really young and at times are going to have those moments when you just wanna feel young and free and if he feel like you are not going to let him do anything then he could possibly want to leave you. go out meet new people sometimes friends could be more like family then you actual family....let him enjoy life a little.
2007-10-14 03:08:46 · answer #9 · answered by alh 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are becoming Fixated / obsessive and truly need to relax. There are no guarantees that an accident will or won't happen, but your fixation will surely lead to problems. He may enjoy your concern right now, but it will soon start to smother him. You need to find out why this has become a problem, many of us have no family, yet we let our spouse have the freedom they need to drive a car etc. You are missing out on life and the joys of your relationship, relax and be happy.
2007-10-14 02:44:19 · answer #10 · answered by canuck1950 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋