Wives/fiancées only....would you be mad?

Question

If you were out with your man, and he went out of his way to be polite and charming to other women, but ignored you?
I went to have a drink with my guy last night, and he started a conversation with the woman sitting next to us....I stood up and said "Excuse me....which one of us are you here with???!?!? Am I invisible or something???", and I stormed out. Did I blow this out of proportion, or was I right to feel slighted? I was out with him, his attention should have been focused on ME only.

She's lucky I didn't throw my drink in her face!

I AM his wife, and I AM NOT a "drama brat"....maybe you should walk a mile in my shoes before you pass judgement, hmmmmm?

naughty.....the only obnoxious thing around here is YOUR response to my question!

Answer 1

Eeeesh, I would ask HIM why he did that.

You don't need to ask if you should be mad, you already are, very.

I have a saying "it's your reality". If something caused you to feel this way, then you do. Is it rational or jealousy? Are you screwed on straight or is your husband rude to you? Are you a drama queen or tired of being a doormat? Was it just a wrong moment or are you threatened by other women? Were you drunk or does this make you sick? Do you own your man outright or is he allowed to have a brain of his own? Do you want to be with someone that makes you feel bad or was this just a bad night?

Usually we know the answers to our questions and if it's not the ones we like it makes us mad. If your guy did this to you DELIBERATELY, get a new guy that doesn't infuriate you.

Life is short, get a short hairy man - they usually give full attention.

Answer 2

If this is the case, by all means you had very good reason to be irritated. He was supposed to be ( even more than ) charming and polite to you, not a complete stranger. But you can't blame her for his rude behavior. The theatrics and drama with your departure are something you have to live with. I think we learn from our less-than-shining moments. Live and learn, right? I would have just graciously excused myself and left. I would not have told him I was leaving. Actually, I probably would not talk to him until the anger had subsided. If I didn't drive, I would have called a cab or a friend. I would expect him to apologize, beg for forgiveness, buy me something pretty and promise to never, ever do something that disrespectful as long as we were together. Now if you're just an insecure, controlling girlfriend and blew up when he was just being his polite, charming self , then the problem is not him. The context that I took it in is that he completely ignored you and was blatantly flirting with some stranger.

Answer 3

Why should you have thrown your drink in her face?
Did the women next to you know this wasn't a friend or your relative?
That women might have waxed your obnoxious behind!
You are really paranoid and although you may have had a point, you were so out of control he may never admit it or even want to be seen with you in public again.
I'm a wife and if this isn't the first time he's done it you, then you shouldn't have been suprised but instead carried yourself like a lady.
If it was the first time, then you reacted irrationally and he should doubt your sanity. You are obviously insecure and think that going to a public social place means he can only talk to you. Men don't like needy women who are drama brats.
We wives can't let you girls who want to be us pretend that you are.

Answer 4

It sounds like there might be some other issues here that you aren't dealing with such as trust and maybe the question of, is he really into you?
Does he do this every time? To what level does he take it? When you say polite and charming does he buy them drinks? Invite them to sit with you all, things like that?
When I married my husband I had trust issues but he sat me down one day and told me that we needed to work this out that he had not ever cheated on me and he didn't want to be treated that way, does this guy acknowledge your feelings in any way except to tell you that you were overreacting or something like that, have you tried to talk to him about your feelings so you guys can work on them together?
I had a friend who once told me that any feeling that you have whether it be sad, happy or otherwise is a valid feeling and should be brought up so bring it up! And see what he says, but then if he continues to do it? Well just tell him you are going to the bathroom and don't come back. Then maybe he can just continue talking to his next victim.

Answer 5

It is very true that you were being ignored to some extent, and i don't think you were blowing it out of proportion. I think it is important that if you man does try to opologise you make an attempt to understand before you make a final judgement.

Men will often get nervous in the presence of a woman they find attractive. If he was frightened enough, he may have been trying to focus his attention on something that calmed him down. He may also have been trying to be nice to other women to show you that he wasn't poor mannered or unkind.

Answer 6

I can understand where you would be upset, but you have to look at the context of the conversation. Did he introduce you? Did he try to conceal the fact that you were together? Were they talking about what was on TV? How long did he go without talking to you at all? Were you included in the conversation at all? Would you have been welcome in the conversation if you had tried, or did you slink back to seathe in anger? Not trying to say you're wrong, but I've been in that situation before, and it sucks. Then, I figured it out. If I tried to get in the conversation instead of sulking and jumping to conclusions, and he still ignored me, then there was a problem. If I tried to join the conversation, and was welcomed into it, it was my problem, not his. Try it out and see what happens. Good luck.

Answer 7

I think maybe you were a little extreme with the storming out stint. If it were me I would have just given "the look" and if that didn't work I would just tap on the shoulder and refocus the attention.

Answer 8

No, I would not have been mad. It seems to me there is more to the story than this one situation. Are you having trust issues? Are you doubting his devotion to you?

Maybe you need to seek guidance from a counselor that could help you work through your feelings.

Answer 9

I would not like it if he did it all of the time. I would not make a scene though. Don't be mad at her. She has no control over your boyfriend. He has control over how he acts and nobody else. If he acts like this before marriage I would really think about this.

Answer 10

Why did you walk out?? I mean I would be upset also, but it was little over the top. You got no reason to be upset with her.