What are the dangers of lighting a fart?

Question

Humorous answers acceptable. (This is not something I practice or intend to practice.)

Sorry Ashley... I didn't see your question.

Answer 1

That you might not be able to stop farting, and the resulting, continual combustion would thrust you into the stratosphere where you'd lose consciousness. Then your smouldering, pantsless form would fall back upon Earth like a giant chunk of Skylab, potentially nailing some unsuspecting Macy's Day Float on live national TV, traumatizing millions. So do consider that horrid scenario before swallowing those kidney beans and striking that match, amigo.

Answer 2

After some deep thought and watching a special episode of South Park, I have come up with a list of reasons why not to light a fart:

1) Major butt burn
2) The possibility of lighting your favorite chair one fire
3) Internal burning, especially if you ate bean burritos or a full meal of paint chips from your window sill last night
4) Possible death - it killed Kenny!
5) Emotional and physical 3rd degree burns.
6) If the fire danger in your area is high, you could start a forest fire
7) The explosion and destruction of your home, depending on if you're a cow and you've let methane gas leak out of your behind for the whole weekend
8) If you light your fart, this could be a catalyst for spontaneous human combustion some time in your life

Like Grandmaster Flash and Duran Duran said about cocaine, "Don't Do It!" On behalf of the Yahoo! Answers community, we would suffer a great deal because of your loss if any harm should come to you due to fart-lighting. While we support you in your endeavours, we feel that more harm could come to you than fame. Good luck!

Answer 3

Everytime I try this it does not pass very a tactics. The methane burns so immediately that it is not that super. in case you relatively could desire to make a sturdy, long flame, take a breath mint spray, a lighter and then purpose it far off from you and you would be wanting an incredible long flame.

Answer 4

Bald butt, fried rump roast are just a couple of the dangers. Then we have the problem of what this can do to smoke detectors and trying to explain to the doctor why you now have a charbroiled rumpus and just what effect will this have on global warming?

Answer 5

Igniting your butt instead.

Burning your entire house down and therefore the entire neighborhood!

how about a random 50 year old guy turning up at your burned down doorstep saying he came up with the idea for the Flaming Fart? And he moons you to prove just how much he worked to make sure it became a well known stunt?

Answer 6

Hopefully melt Ashley's computer so she can't give anymore rude answers.

Answer 7

Your girlfriend walking in just as you release your gas, only to be disappointed that you didn't even manage to impress her with your flame throwing expertise, as the match simply extinguishes in a pathetic puff.

Answer 8

you may burn all the hair off the back of your hand
you'll miss all the hair on your butt
it may melt the Bic
it may blow out the match
you may catch your family jewels on fire

try that and chewing a wintergreen lifesaver at the same time

Answer 9

well....in the attempt to light it you might sneeze, thus moving the lighter too close to the fabric.....and THEN...people would think your a liar...BECAUSE...liar liar pants on fire......or..if for some reason your naked in your attempt.your gonna ge some nice looks at the emergency room while explaining how you managed to light your butt hair and possible your furrberries.....on fire.....

Answer 10

Under normal circumstances you would only lose a few pubic hairs. If you had lunch at Taco Bell you could lose an arm.