my husband has the right to get money or advances on his paycheck. well when i got his pay stub today is has advances for 1160.00 taken out leaving me 288.73 left to pay bills with. this is not the first time he has done this it has been going on a couple months but he is starting to take more and more the phone bill is through the rough (cell) electric is due water house phone hardly any food. and alot of other bills are late and getting cut off in the next week or two. why could or would my husband be doing this. I just started back to work as I have been raising his kids my step kids for the last three years. I'm fixing to lose eveything and I cant get him to say anything about his advances he keeps telling me that payroll is behind and that he is geting chrgeed for thing and fuel he has bought to put in the company truck he's a truck driver. but it has been to many times in a row and the amount is getting hire each week. he clames he is eating canned food and going without.
2007-10-13 15:56:37 · 10 answers · asked by sunshine 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I know by rights it's his money because he was the one working but when I cant work because of the kids and at his request to stay at home and be there for them. I have to have money to pay the bills and get food for the kids. so with him yelling and screaming I got a job. because I can hardly pay the morgage payment much less the other bills. our cars are payed off so its just your normal bills that we have. pluse he is hardly ever home maybe four day's a month. not sure if he is cheeting know he is drinking after work since his job is simi local but it's based in another state. when I asked him about this paystub he never even answered or said anything just hung up and sent a text that said lost phone single call you back later that was hours ago. why is he doing this to his kids and me. they are his kids my step kids. but i have cared for them for three years whats up is it a mid life or what?
2007-10-13 16:02:44 · update #1
oh ya the 1160.00 in advances is for one weeks pay. after his advacne and taxes we got only 288.00 for the week. what could he do with 11600.00 in one week lives in truck does not have to pay for fuel since he works for the company not an owner. and since he goes back to the yard every night maybe a girl or bar hoping with the guy's and buying there drinks and food i don't know.
2007-10-13 16:12:21 · update #2
You need to find out what he is doing. This is a necessity. If he is not willing to share, then tell him that you can only assume the worst.
Also what you two might need to do is set aside a bank account that is just for the bills. Tell him how much you need in there, and if he doesn't respond then something is definitely wrong, and something needs to be done.
He also should not be charged for the fuel, I'm sure it's against a rule somewhere unless it's in the contract. I'm not too sure about that, however.
2007-10-13 16:05:35 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honey, do yourself a favor and have your paychecks deposited into another account that he does not have access to. He's lying to you and there is no sense in having him drag you down with him. I wouldn't necessarily say he's cheating, but if he's drinking, there may be a strip club involved. Especially with that kind of money disappearing. I'd also call his place of employment and check on the payroll story, or if you don't have the courage to, then simply tell him you called and see what he says. He's up to no good. You know this, don't be foolish enough to believe him honey.
There is also another thing. Just because you were staying at home taking care of the kids, does not mean you were not contributing to the family. You were doing the hardest job of all that saved your family a ton of money. Consider the child care expenses alone and if you had worked, all your money would have been going to child care. You were doing a noble thing and it was a huge sacrifice. Don't you dare be hard on yourself about that. You should be commended for caring enough to put your family first.
As for the bills that are over-due and in jeopardy of being shut off, call around to your social services organizations and churches. Take the money you normally use for rent to pay off those bills and then get money from them to pay your rent. The Salvation army will usually write out a check right to your landlord. They only do it once a year per family, so make sure it's enough to pay the important things. They will also help with light and phone bills. You should also call your phone company and ask about the lifeline link-up program. If you qualify, they offer huge discounts on your phone bill, and may even provide basic phone service for as little as $15 per month.
I hope this helps and keep your chin up honey. Once you change the money situation, things should be back to the way they use to be.
Take care,
2007-10-13 16:16:18 · answer #2 · answered by Hollynfaith 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Can his place of employment put his checks in a direct deposit? I am sorry but I don't trust most truck drivers. They are on the road and gone to long and could be up to things you would never know about. Maybe he should find a local job that brings him home to his family every night? He is keeping information from you and thats the same as lying to you! I would do some investegating here and find out what he is up to? You cannot live like this.
2007-10-13 16:46:57 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
some sailors may have a girl in every port but some truck drivers have a girl in every town. He is using you to baby sit while he is out doing his thing. If it is a company truck, they probably pay for the gas so he is just blowing money.
Take your pay check and get your own apartment and leave him with the bills and the kids, get an attorney and perhaps there is a chance that if you want to you can take the kids with you and sue for child support. The marriage is not worth saving if he is doing that to you
2007-10-13 16:09:58 · answer #4 · answered by Al B 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is obviously spending the money on things other than what it's supposed to be used for and he doesn't want you to know about it.
I'd consider talking with him and if he thinks it isn't a problem and refuses to see that bills need to be paid, then I'd consider finding myself a better husband.
2007-10-13 16:19:22 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to have a real heart to heart talk with him. This sounds like common behaviour in people with gambling debts, or taking drugs. You have to find out and try to work it out together before it's too late. Hopefully, it ends up to be nothing major like that.
2007-10-13 16:01:36 · answer #6 · answered by Linni 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hes doing something that he dont want you to know about.. he needs to find a way to cut back a little more..like taking a cooler and keeping lunch meat in it and snacks and drinks. but you do need to ask him about it and can he show you where it all went.you might have to get a better paying job yourself. good luck
2007-10-13 16:04:15 · answer #7 · answered by Kat 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
something is definitely wrong here. You need to get to the bottom of it because he's up to no good.
2007-10-13 17:21:00 · answer #8 · answered by coolmommy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
why is he stealing his own money, can he at least talk to you before getting cash advances.
your husband is hiding something from you.
2007-10-13 16:02:12 · answer #9 · answered by Binibini 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
something is up..you need to find out and get him help..or cut ties before he drags you down..
2007-10-13 16:05:45 · answer #10 · answered by Digs59 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋