it has been a few wks since he officially broke up with me after 4 years b/c he was unhappy... should i send a book da vinci code (ordered on amazon for dirt cheap), and a plain card that just says happy bday... i won't wrap the present up, just send it in plain manila envelope. i have no intentions of getting back together, just as a nice way for me to end this chapter in my life and move on.
2007-10-13 11:22:18 · 15 answers · asked by GirlinTrouble 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
This isn't closure. It's hanging on by your finger nails.
2007-10-13 11:36:59 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
I don't think so. Obviously there is still pain in this breakup and this is a subconscious action on your part to remain attached in some way. If you do it once, you will do it again.
I know how it feels, an ex broke up with me and I gave him a gift anyway, and realize now that I only did it hoping he would at least call me to say thank you or something. It was a psychological game that of course doesn't work.
Can you just get your money back?
2007-10-13 11:29:25 · answer #2 · answered by godzillagirl 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you are lying to yourself if you are thinking that this is JUST a bday gift. you are trying to get this man to react in a way that you and him will renew the relationship and you get back with him. LEAVE HIM ALONE. respect his wishes and decision and more importantly yourself. he was unhappy with you and the relationship and ended so let it go. dont send him nothing. you need to send yourself to get some help professional so that you can move on. in the law eyes this would be called SHOCKING so just cut your loses and move on sweetie. i know its hard but you can do it. he was not the one and you will find another who will be all that you want and need and you two will be happy but you must be emotionally and mentally prepared to receive the new man thats coming. GodBless
2007-10-13 11:37:34 · answer #3 · answered by Crystal G 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
everyone who keeps saying no, it's over, are obviously bitter and will never have a working relationship. if you're not willing to risk denial by sending him the book and not hearing back, then you don't care enough about him. maybe he's unhappy because you aren't showing him you care enough....like not sending him a present on his birthday even though you are not together. as mentioned, if you want to be friends or have a chance at getting back together, send it. if you just don't want to be alone, don't send it.
2007-10-13 11:55:10 · answer #4 · answered by shawn j 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am impressed and I see no harm in it. Why not write on the inside of the birthday card, "No hard feelings. Best wishes always." Then sign it. What a nice mature way to handle yourself. Well done.
2007-10-13 11:45:12 · answer #5 · answered by bonnieboobabe 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Did you buy it before the break up? I say donate it to a library. Why give someone who broke up with you a book and card... Seems pretty silly to me.
2007-10-13 11:27:40 · answer #6 · answered by Go Bears! 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Wrap it first then send, that way you will be happy and the closure will make you feel a better person.
2007-10-13 11:28:12 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
If you want to remain friends then sure but if you want to completely move on then i wouldn't send him the book...maybe the card though
2007-10-13 11:26:34 · answer #8 · answered by EchosOfAngels 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If it's something you need to do in order to move on, I say go for it.
2007-10-13 11:43:55 · answer #9 · answered by elizabeth_ashley44 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That would be nice of you. If you have no other motives other than to give a gift, go ahead, altough don't be surprised if he takes it as you trying to get back with him.
2007-10-13 11:28:04 · answer #10 · answered by shellj_foxy 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋