ive decided to bring my 4 year old daughter up on my own... and not meet another man till she has grown up.. think im scared that we will be treated bad again..... am i doing the right thing?.....
2007-10-13 02:39:34 · 22 answers · asked by kaz 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
yes, great decision, your daughter deserves that
2007-10-13 02:43:43 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
You did the right thing by leaving a man who was a control freak and violent not just for you but for the sake of your daughter.
I can fully understand why you feel no more men until daughter is older and that is normal feelings and thoughts bearing in mind what has just happened. Do not rule out completly anyone else not all men are like that there are some good men out there.
For now enjoy your freedom, the relationship with your daughter and just put the thought of anyone else at back of your mind love will come when you least expect it too.
Good luck and you did the right thing give daughter lots of love and hugs as she will need to be made safe and secure emotionally.
2007-10-13 03:00:56 · answer #2 · answered by momof3 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's premature to make a decision on whether you will meet another man until your daughter has grown up. The decision to leave a violent man was best for you. However, think about yourself also. You will want male company after a period of time has elapsed and your thinking on this matter will change. Compare having someone who gets to know your daughter as she grows and matures versus having someone walk into both of your lives after she's already grown. Personally, if I were in your situation, I'd rather meet someone who is there as my daughter grows, matures and develops a personality. It's possible a new man in your life would make a significant difference in both your lives.
2007-10-13 02:56:52 · answer #3 · answered by Frosses 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I applaud you. Maybe on down the road, you will meet a great man. I am sure you know some warning signs that a guy will be an abuser. If not, get educated, get your life back and live this life like you and your daughter deserve. I am so glad you left. I love the idea that you aren't running out looking for a man and are focusing your time and attention on your daughter and yourself instead. Maybe later, but right now, there is some healing and confidence and happiness you will be working on. Good luck to you both and sincere best wishes.
2007-10-13 02:48:28 · answer #4 · answered by whereRyou? 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You certainly are for leaving your violent and controlling ex, sounds like its the best thing for your daughter too. As for other men give yourself some breathing space to get over your last relationship and in time you might meet somebody who you can trust and who will be loving and treat you and your daughter as you should be. You will probably feel wary of people but just take things slowly and dont push people away on the basis that you think everyone is like your ex...good luck and well done for being strong and leaving.
2007-10-13 02:46:24 · answer #5 · answered by caz111175 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you did the right thing by getting out of the relationship but you do not want to necessarily rule out another relationship with someone else if the right person comes along because it is better to have a solid, good male figure in your daughters life as well. Just take it slow and don't rush into a relationship too quickly
2007-10-13 03:00:35 · answer #6 · answered by Al B 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Till she has grown up is a long time...
Go easy on yourself. I can completely understand your fear of being hurt again. I have felt like that. It eases. You will meet the right one , one day. In the meantime, enjoy bringing up your daughter the best you can, and be proud of your achievements.
2007-10-13 06:23:42 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
So far...yes. I believe that was the right thing to do. But, don't count yourself out. Mr. Right may come along before you know it. So, don't shoot down every guy till your daughter is grown. That's about 12 long years from now. Just be as cautious as possible, but don't let your husband's behavior cause you to be alone......
2007-10-13 02:45:52 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Like the others, i congratulate you.
Although i think its vital that you try and meet new men.
Not everyone will be violent, but i understand it will be hard to trust new people.
Good luck, and i hope you and your daughter are happy together.
:)
2007-10-13 03:17:34 · answer #9 · answered by Ali_ xx 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i will in basic terms inform you of what i might do if this became me, 1st ,i might permit him know how this makes me sense if that didnt do any sturdy then 2nd i might provide a guiding principle of a few form of compromise like :ok if that disillusioned you expensive then in line with threat you will possibly decide to help our worker to get to our worksite.then if he nonetheless retains doin this style of element provide an ultimatum in case you stay this way i will could evaluate not being right here for you any further. then as a final hotel if he nonetheless doesnt respond in a favorable way it may desire to be time to evaluate a divorce. or in line with threat even some counseling in case you will truly shop your marriage.
2016-10-22 06:13:19 · answer #10 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Go 'head girl! Congrats on your decision. It's takes a strong woman to realize that she can do and deserves better!! I think you're doing the right thing..you don't want her to see that it's ok for mommy to be abused, she may follow the pattern because she thinks it's 'normal'. I wouldn't shy completely away from guys. I would go to counseling to understand why you made the mistake in marrying someone who was abusive, and take dating slow. When you meet a guy, get to know him on your own..when things progress and he's willing to take it slow, introduce him to your daughter. If he can wait until you're ready then he just might be worth it.
2007-10-13 02:46:50 · answer #11 · answered by Lisa D 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋