Im a girl who is 13 years old. B4 3 months a boy in my school (who is a leader 4 a gang called (Black Fire) asked me to join his gang. Of course i refused not 4 a personal thing but bcoz his gang and he are trouble makers and they wer about to be fired frm the school 2 times. he tried hard to induce me to join his gang but i refused too.
aftr 4 days he started to tell my friends wrong bad things about me and they believed him.and they started to leave me one aftr another till i found my self alone.
The last Monday I went to Jhon(The leader of the gang) and asked him y he is doing this with me? He answerd me by 2 chices either to join his gang or i will be unlikely girl soon. i went to my friends and told them all the story but no one listend or believed me wat shall I do? Do i join his disgusting gang and get my friends back or just do nothing and be the most unlikable girl in school. im losing my life plz help me in any way.
2007-10-12 23:32:44 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
Ask yourself, "Are these people truly my friends?" if they are so mindless as to take in considerations and thoughts from another person and not their own thoughts and experiences of you, then they're not thinking for themselves and that is not how a friend should be. What this guy is doing is abusing you emotionally. Don't give in.
Be yourself, and since you believe that all his 'gang' does is cause trouble, then you definitely have a good reason not to give in into his stupidity. Honestly - you would rather be left alone then be expelled or so from school.
Peer pressure is this whole thing where they will try to pull you into traps when you are confident about yourself and when you're different. Don't be a sheep - just try to talk to your friends and still be their friends, but don't let them tell you what to do. You are you and nobody else, and they should not be so ignorant as to put you in this spot. I support your decisions all the way hunny, and you shouldn't feel like you did something wrong because this is exactly what this guy wants you to feel. Act confident around him, even when you aren't on the inside, and this will push off his rule over you. He wants to conquer and control you, show him the opposite and until he no longer has influence on you. Bullies try to make people miserable. It's not all physical either.
Take a walk and or a shower to freshen your mind, try not to think too much about these sort of things although it may be hard. Listen to the music you like, watch a show on tv that you love, do what makes you happy. Negativity is natural in life, but thinking negative is not - so just be optimistic and enjoy life while you're at it. ;) Know that because you have resisted his invitation, you may seem like a target and a victim to his gang, but in fact, you're a hero to wisdom and knowledge. ;) Just continue with what you are doing (ignoring his influences) and be strong, because times like these are understandably complicated in life. Especially when you're entering your teenage years with all the almost uncontrollable harmones. Be strong, you can do it. =)
2007-10-12 23:59:30 · answer #1 · answered by Nightwolf 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
At your age it is difficult to believe that something like this is not a major crisis in your life, but when you look back on it when you are older you have to wonder why you agonized so much.
You need to ignore this guy - don't let him pressure you into anything. Get a journal to write your feelings in. Continue to be pleasant to your friends at school, and pour your energies into something else like a hobby, your studdies, or a sport.
If you join the gang, he wins, and will continue to intimidate others in the same manner. If you resist, eventually he will get tired of hassling you and move on to an easier target.
It may seem like an eternity to you, but it will all blow over. Don't waste your time trying to get people to believe your story. Just go on with your life the best you can, and maybe you need to make some new friends.
2007-10-12 23:44:23 · answer #2 · answered by Theresa 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
relax! don't be confused. Being alone doesn't mean you are lonely. You can be happy if you want too....even when you are alone.
Don't join the gang....that gang will 100% ruin/destroy your life.
You know what's your really problem is...its not loosing your friends or joining the gang...it is on how do you see yourself.
Begin to like/love yourself first. Being likable or unlikable in school is not your main goal, isn't? Your so called friends who believe others than you is NOT your TRUE friends.
Your still young and you will encounter many problems....so be strong! It will help you to mold your character.
2007-10-13 00:01:16 · answer #3 · answered by Gabriel 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Eeek. Sounds complicated. Tbh your friends shouldve believed you over the gang people if they were good friends.
You shouldn't do anything you don't want to. So if you don't want to be in the gang, don't. If anything you should be proud that you didn't get sucked into it cos it makes you all the more different from the other people who gave in and said yes.
If they do carry on to bug you, you could always just tell them to bugger off.. or just let someone know they're bothering you.
Whatever you do just make sure you do what YOU want to do and not what the gang or your friends want you to do.
Good Luck.
2007-10-12 23:42:37 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your friends aren't really friends at all if they believe this guy and not you. Just ignore all of them, don't even think about joining that stupid gang! Move on and you will find some new friends who will treat you better. Give it time
2007-10-12 23:43:06 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
try to save his answers on a tape and make everyone hear what he is asking u to do and never join his gang even if u will stay alone
2007-10-16 23:42:01 · answer #6 · answered by Tetyana M 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do you really have true friends???
Don't worry, be yourself. People will come to you again, once they know the truth. No need to beg them, please them or convince them.
Those who committed mistake only do all these in order to gain confidence.
2007-10-12 23:48:34 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋