One of my closest friends is having marital problems & out of respect, I've asked that she consult a professional. I just don't want to give bad advice or interfere in any way. On the other hand, her husband has been calling a lot. He keeps tabs on me thru her. So he'll call and want rant to me about their problems. I've tried explaining that I don't want to be put in the middle, but he'll go on and give me personal details. For the most part I ignore him, and have made it known to my friend that I'm uneasy with his behavior.
Lately, he's been behaving inappropriately, telling me he loves me. Or he'll give me tight hugs and make some kind of creepy comment about how I'm wonderful. Really, I've tried to ignore it, but my friend seems to be sticking with him because of guilt but it's just he's downright repulsive. today he even sent me a msg about how I'm ungrateful, because I ignore the people that love & adore me most, and then he asked me to send photos. No way. How do i handle this?
2007-10-12 23:31:22 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
You need to get both you AND your friend away from this man. He has emotional issues of his own and (I can tell from how he manipulates your friend with guilt, and is trying it on you) that he is emotionally abusive! The longer she stays with him the harder it will be for her to leave! Trust me! RUN!
2007-10-12 23:38:17 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I understand this is a close friend but you should get as far away from this situation as possible. It, as you put it, is VERY creepy that he acts the way he does with you and you are right to feel disgusted by him. He is not only not making your good friend unhappy but now he's crossing lines he shouldn't be with you! His behavior is absolutely & totally inappropriate and you don't want to let it continue.
So, does your friend KNOW all this? If she does, she has serious issues of her own, staying with a man who is acting like this. If not, you should tell her all the things he's done to make you feel so repulsed. It may hurt her but we all deserve to know the truth, however painful it may be. She'll have to face the fact that she's married to a man who is has crossed too many boundaries with you.
She needs to know and if she can't handle the WHOLE truth, she'll lose a really great friend. Most people I know would not have put up with so much for another. You have done SO much for them both: stayed neutral, tried to be there for both of them, tried to respect their privacy, put up with his calls...you have gone above and beyond. There is not a thing you could have done better. I don't think ignoring him is working. Any time you spend talking, texting, or being around him is just putting you in an increasingly awkward position that you shouldn't have to be in. You really have done all you can do. Put MORE space between you and their very troubled lives. Hopefully she will join you and get away from him too! Good luck!
2007-10-13 00:32:34 · answer #2 · answered by mickeymel9 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you want to enable your husband understand that his ego is at stake the following. perchance he's playing the very undeniable reality that you're seen perfect by using human beings on the point of him and is getting somewhat strengthen on the understanding that you're his. notwithstanding, those moves by using the wonderful chum are extremely irrelevant. i must ask, why do you've this guy's wide form? Why are you txting him? Delete his wide form and do not play into it, i understand that this may look presumptuous and that i'm not implying you've thoughts in route of this guy yet undergo in techniques that all of us is at risk of tolerating something undesirable because it makes them experience wanted / particular. Delete the wide form, tell the husband immediately up - This guy is attempting to thieve your spouse from you. This guy isn't a blood relative for your husband and his loyalties could lie with you. supply him the strict note that this guy could care a lot less about your marriage. Worst case situation and that i'm sorry to be declaring it, perchance your husband is tolerating it because he needs to commence up some form of love triangle? sturdy success
2016-10-09 03:36:50 · answer #3 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think this guy needs a blunt message from you that says you’re not interested in him, and would never be interested in him regardless of his relationship with your friend. As a previous answerer said, this guy is trying to play head games with you. He’s trying to give you a guilt trip about how ungrateful you are. I would loved to have had the opportunity to be the one to reply to that message. Who says all love and adoration needs to be reciprocated with appreciation? In fact, by insinuating how ungrateful one must be to not appreciate their love and adoration, shows nothing more than selfishness and manipulation; two things that are wholly different from love and adoration. Perhaps John Lennon and Selena would be better off if they had been able to avoid the people who "loved and adored" THEM.
2007-10-13 05:10:47 · answer #4 · answered by Mickey Mouse Spears 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm so sorry that you're in such sticky situation. It's easy advise than to do. I think, the best is be a bad person for once. Tell your friend everything n kick the butt of this repulsive man. Tell him you mean business n get away from you. Dont be the nice, courteous lady. Be fierce.
2007-10-13 00:04:44 · answer #5 · answered by candie 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Copy this question and send it to him with an explaination that you've posted it on Yahoo Answers and as soon as you've had a suitable response you'll let him know how you're going to get rid of him ..... if he doesn't take the hint from that ... you'll have to take a contract out on him
2007-10-12 23:36:28 · answer #6 · answered by deadkelly_1 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Slam the phone down when he calls. If he tries to touch you, give him a swift kick in the balls.
2007-10-13 00:32:00 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Get you boyfriend/husband/brother/guy friend/daddy to go tell him off. Or tell your friend he's been hitting on you & he might be doing this to other people.
2007-10-13 00:01:35 · answer #8 · answered by Keke 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Get your bf (or brother or father or a good guy friend) to kick his ***. I would.
2007-10-12 23:38:51 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
send him photos.
Edit: The more I thought about this, the more I am thinking that he would not be acting this way if you didn't some how provoke it. I bet you flirt with him and just how does he have youe email to be asking you to send photos anyway???????
2007-10-12 23:36:35 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 3⤋