my future brother and sister in law have a six month old baby and the mother use to smoke pot but the father smokes pot everyday with the baby present. this really bothers me. they are not married yet. i am a licensed social worker, but i jsut got my licensed a couple months ago. well, he is alwyas smoking pot always. and it really bugs me. speciually with the baby. they are my future family, but ethically i am suppose to report this. but i feel i cant sicne they are fmaily. but i am concerned about the baby. i have expressed my concern to them and to my fiance. but nothing has changed. i could jsut not go over there anymore. but i am concerned about the 6 month old.....what do i do? nark on them? but i could lose my job too, if anyone else found out i knew and didnt report.....
2007-10-12 18:35:57 · 17 answers · asked by drock 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Newborn & Baby
if i did report it, our relationship would be over......i am so torn!!!!!!! my fiance has tried to talk to them too..but i am the licensed social worker, and its my fiances brother so he may be less judgmental than me...
2007-10-12 18:37:51 · update #1
Go with your gut. Report them. That baby has no one else on its side. Your fiance will respect you for your moral convictions. If he doesn't, then he doesn't respect you at all. Stick to your guns, that baby needs you.
2007-10-12 18:40:52 · answer #1 · answered by Jes 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You obviously dont need to spell at all to be a social worker lol. Do what your heart tells you, I know that if my brother or anyone in my family smoked pot around any child I would report them and Im not a social worker. Its illegal for a reason and they are harming the baby and the longer you take the longer they are damaging that babies brain, heart, lungs and the babies little body.
You should have kept quiet then narked on them and no one would be the any wiser that it was you.
2007-10-12 19:37:12 · answer #2 · answered by Lucky Mummy to 2!!! 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm not sure if legally you are required to report it, since it's family. I think it could be a "conflict of interest" thing [or kind of like an Attorney/Client privelidge thing, like Attorneys and Clients have]
Legally, I'm not sure. Morally, it's up to you.
But you do need to realize, if you DO report them, you are opening a HUGE can of worms. And starting a marriage off with drama between the in-laws is NOT a good idea.
But on the other hand - I can see that you are worried for the child.
Do you really feel that the childs life is in danger in any way??
[is the baby inhaling the smoke??]
If the answer is yes, then report them immediately, and worry about the consequences later!!
good luck with your decision! God bless!
2007-10-12 18:48:13 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
can U report it without giving your name? The baby is breathing in the smoke too. What is it doing to a developing child? The effects are probably a lot worse for a child. They are so much smaller than adults. Do U really want to be a member of a family that would endanger a child? It is bad enough smoking tobacco around children. Tell someone, now.
2007-10-12 18:44:54 · answer #4 · answered by bhappy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is a general rule of thumb that babies under 15 pounds will drink about 2 - 21/2 ounces of formula per pound of body weight per day. However, 15 pounds and over, the rule of thumb is based on individual feedings. Typically a baby will be drinking about 5 bottles per day with each one containing about an ounce for every 2 pounds of weight. So, at 18 pounds, he may want as much as 9 ounces per feeding. In regards to the smoking, no amount of second hand smoke is good for anyone, especially babies. I think it is not unreasonable to ask your husband's family not to smoke around the baby, but if you are staying at their home that may be more of an imposition than they are willing to go along with. We aren't smokers so we wouldn't even stay in a home with people who were. You and your husband need to work out what is acceptable to you and go with that. Odd dreams while pregnant are actually quite common. No, you aren't the only one. Probably about 1/2 the women I know had really bizarre dreams when they were pregnant. I didn't, but a lot of women do.
2016-05-22 04:43:53 · answer #5 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I see it as you have a moral obligation as a social worker and as an adult and soon to be uncle of a child, to report this. Even more so if you are a licensed social worker! And that baby is WELL worth a good old fashion family feud. Can you turn them in "anonymously"? Give me their names and address and the number to child services and I will call for you more than willingly! Then you can honestly say you didnt turn them in.
You can't just stop going over there! YOU apparently are the only one thinking rationally in this situation, if you just ignore it, thats like turning your back on that innocent little baby. And you never know, you could be saving that childs life AND your future bil's life too... maybe they need a wake up call! Losing their child may be enough to make them wake up and straighten up... and they could thank you in the long run. Please please please, do what's right for this little baby!
2007-10-12 18:48:32 · answer #6 · answered by Mommy to 1+triplets 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No, they didn't!
What does your husband-to-be think about this? If he isn't concerned, that's another issue you need to deal with, because it could mean that he and you won't agree about other moral/ethical choices down the road.
I think you need to try to find a way to anonymously report so that it won't come back on you. You are right, as a social worker you are bound to report abuse and this sure qualifies in my book.
You also need to work on setting some clear boundaries with your future in-laws to keep yourself out of trouble and from compromising your values and ethics--if I were you, I wouldn't be spending time with them or inviting them over. If your future husband is not supportive of you, it is a major red flag for the relationship.
2007-10-12 18:43:55 · answer #7 · answered by arklatexrat 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Go to your boss with a hypothetical question...perhaps your boss will know a way around it...if nothing else tell someone else (I'll do it) and let them do the report. Not only do you have an obligation to your job but this is an ethical question too. One last question, do you care about that child? If the answer is yes then your path is clear
2007-10-12 18:46:39 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Call the baby's pediatrician and inform them. When the baby comes in they can do a drug test on the baby to determine the level of exposure. If they detect anything in the baby's system they will have no choice but to report the parents. Depending on what state/province you are in, the parents will know it was the doctor's office that reported them, they don't need to know you tipped them off!
2007-10-13 01:38:50 · answer #9 · answered by babybugs1980 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You are a mandated reporter by law. I can understand the situation but, this is in the best interest of a child. As a foster parent I would not want you as a worker if this is something you feel the need to think about. Its not about you and this is the same mistake these parents are making.
2007-10-12 18:51:54 · answer #10 · answered by Mom of 5 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋