has anyone had to deal with their wives about them having a child that wasn't theirs? that is you married your wife two years later a baby comes along you raise it until its about 8 years old and you find out the child isnt actually yours. has anyone went through this? if so what did you do? how you react?
2007-10-12 15:20:43 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
That sounds like a Jerry Springer show
2007-10-12 15:24:12 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
You react with a broken heart. What you thought was, you find out was a lie. Very hurtful. The child has already bonded with you as dad and with all your family and you have bonded with the child. Now you have to make the decision, if you will stay in the marriage or if you will get a divorce. The child of course you will always love.
2007-10-12 22:30:16 · answer #2 · answered by Sweet Suzy 777! 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Putting aside her deception , putting aside the fact that a child you have raised financially , emotionally for 8 years and I assume love as 1 of your own who is innocent in all this mess his mother caused.
Could you picture not being this child's father even with the hurt your feeling? do you feel that it is fair on the child to suffer punishment of knowing your not the dad biologically by abandoning it now? This kind of situation can really screw a kid up , they could become addicted to alcahol at a very young age and then drugs because of the pain of believing they are 1 thing but then finding out they are another , can you live with that?.
Punish her all you want she deserves it for this major betrayel but please please do NOT punish that child.
2007-10-12 23:01:32 · answer #3 · answered by JadeyOz 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i am sincerely sorry to learn of an extremely difficult plight.
that has to be very painful
but at this point you must love the child.
the child is innocent and you should not make the child responsible for the sin of the mother. nor should the child be placed in a difficult condition.
i can't imagine how that might feel.
nor have i had such an experience.
how did you determine the child is not yours? please advise.
2007-10-12 22:28:10 · answer #4 · answered by ramni222 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like my situation.
Get a lawyer then get a paternity test to prove legally
the child is not yours.
After the test is done and your not the father the lawyer can recind the child support order.
Best of luck to you! M
2007-10-12 22:55:12 · answer #5 · answered by M 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
you continue to raise that child as you have, all children are a gift, you must not keep this information from the child, if they find out later they will hate you for not telling, they should always be able ask anything anytime about this, my two oldest girls are not my biological children, it was never kept from them, and i have lived it as a child myself, i had to work it out myself and my last name was not my birth name, so think of the child, AND EXPOSE HER FOR WHAT SHE IS
2007-10-12 22:56:16 · answer #6 · answered by maxasmax 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
if she knew that child was not yours and intentionally lied to you, then i would say do not believe her anymore and you should leave her. but if she had no idea...then maybe you guys can work through this. whatever happens, remember the child had nothing to do with all this...he/she is innocent. dont take your anger out on him/her. that child deserves to have a father....
2007-10-12 22:29:33 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
you leave
such layers of deception deserve divorce
the screwed part is that YOU may be held for child support for a child that is not yours
so get a good lawyer
you need it in a divorce
2007-10-12 22:24:41 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Damn. *Shakes head*... DAMN.
2007-10-12 22:30:01 · answer #9 · answered by TwyztedChyck 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋