all she do is stays in the house, she is 20 years old and never had a boyfriend she is very pretty she is a little over weight she is a size 20 and i am a size 14 i have tired everything she has lost 40 pounds and still she wont go anywhere. i have taking hers shopping, manicure and pedicure, and gotten her hair done what else can i do????
2007-10-12 05:30:47 · 15 answers · asked by msangiez 2 in Beauty & Style ➔ Other - Beauty & Style
Boost her self esteem! That is the core of the problem. With self esteem everything else will follow! If she had some she would certainly be more apt to do normal stuff. Maybe even lose weight. You have to be happy inside to survive these days! That means make her feel good about herself. No sarcasm, insults or put downs from anyone, only POSITIVE POSITIVE POSITIVE! It will be hard since she has gone like this all her life. It will take something big to motivate her!
2007-10-12 05:33:23 · answer #1 · answered by char__c is a good cooker 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
There is nothing else you can do. That's good what you have done so far. Be there for her remind her that she is a beautiful person weigh has nothing to do with it. Beauty is only skin deep. And besides I know alot of men that love women of all sizes. One time I was turned down from a man that was about 260 lbs. he said I was to small that hurt but I got over it. lol
I also back in my early 20's dated a man about 300 lbs. and love it.. a very nice pillow after we came from the clubs. Love yourself girl!! you are beautiful!!
2007-10-12 06:22:37 · answer #2 · answered by hershey 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
firstly, i think you are so good and thoughtful!!
right! i think sometimes people who are low (even though they might not realise) are in a bit of a self destruct mode - like they don't want to go out and help themselves, they kinda enjoy the attention, the pity etc...is easier to sit in a room alone than to activate yourslef to go to a party when you feel low. so is a vicious cirlce that may be hard to crack if she realises you are doing all this for her or it may be that she doesn't like the pity - can be a little patronising, embarassing, etc
so i would suggest that you make it like SHE is doing a favour for YOU - like say that you have this invite to a party you really really want to go to but that will know no one there and would appreciate it so much if she went to keep you company. you want her opinion about an outfit at the shopping centre that you are unsure about...or that you want to take up tennis but need a partner....things like that. she'll feel useful, appreciated and wanted, not pitied or like a burden. a great self esteem boost! and also, glossing over the fact she is in her room being low may help her to pull her out of the problem...pity can sometimes only work to encourage the problem
just give it a week or so between doing this approach and the approach you are taking now or she might realise that you don't *really* need that tennis partner.
remember to be grateful!
2007-10-12 05:44:48 · answer #3 · answered by Julia 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Thats sad to hear. No one should feel that way. Start small, see if she'd like to go on a walk on a nature trail, chances are not a lot of people will be out and she can have fun, but still not be around people, then continue doing things like that and ease her back into social situations. Let her know she's beautiful!
2007-10-12 05:34:43 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You need to see if you can find some kind of support group with people around her age in it. this way she can get out and talk to people with similar problems and feelings. She would get a chance to make new friends and maybe this would would help her self esteem. (maybe she could even meet a guy)
2007-10-12 05:45:59 · answer #5 · answered by suzy 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Tell her beauty come from the heart and mind not the body.
Dont have such a low selfesteem...
Go out and have fun..she is 20, she is young....
Look at all the overweight or big people out there.. they go to beach, movies, malls and have a fun of their life... and they are enjoying every moments of it....
People will not look at you and say OMG she is huge and big..... those who say that are jealous because they can't be big like her........
Just get out the house and enjoy........
there are people out there that they wish they have sister like you to go out and support their family.....
Your sister is lucky to have you.
2007-10-12 05:35:59 · answer #6 · answered by kennilope 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Dang she must be bored. Take her to some party and tell her its just a walk or something but take her to a party and have her meet some new poeple. It might work.
2007-10-12 05:33:19 · answer #7 · answered by Vanka 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Unfortunately until she's comfortable in her own skin, she's not going to want to do anything. That's just how some women are. Just be supportive of her choices!
2007-10-12 05:35:04 · answer #8 · answered by kiwi606 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well if shes a size 20...shes not that small(no offense)just convince her that shes pretty and get a guy to help out.
2007-10-12 05:34:51 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
cheer her up i no it may seem imature but do a fashion show in the sitting room and get her gigglin at all the strange 1's lol
2007-10-12 05:34:20 · answer #10 · answered by rebecca a 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋