When you seperate for a short time, it is ok to explore?

Question

I'm just wondering what everyone's take is when a couple decides to separate to 'figure things out'. Everyone has their arguments & sometimes ends up in time away from eachother.

During this time away from eachother, do you think it's okay for one to meet other people & if the 'friendship' heats up & leads to sex, do you think this is acceptable?

I guess the real question is: when you separate & you sleep with someone, is this considered cheating or not, since you were not emotionally/physically together?

FYI: I'm not the one giving all these thumbs down to all these comments... Some jerk out there seems to think differently...

Answer 1

Wait til divorce papers are signed,sealed,and delivered...

Answer 2

Well, you may not be together physically, but it doesn't mean that you are not emotionally.
It totally depends on the reason(s) why you took a break in the first place.
If it were to rethink your relationship, then obviously, you'd definitely be cheating by sleeping or dating someone else.
Now, if you took a break, but it meant that you were in fact just going your separate ways for good, then, you'd have no account to give to anybody and it wouldn't be called cheating.
As long as both partner were clear that, a break meant, a permanent break.
You sound more like a player to me. If I were seeing someone and took a break for some reason, but knew or hoped we had a chance to go back together, I wouldn't want to explore. Otherwise, it'd meant that i'd have no respect, conscience or real feelings for that person. I'd be just a user!

Answer 3

If you separate to "figure things out" the relationship is in limbo, a grey area, and any action that could cause further complications in the relationship should be avoided.
Certain understandings should be reached when a split is happenning. While you may not be physically together "figuring things out" implies that the relationship isn't over, there's just a breather. Looking for answers in another woman's underwear is hardly appropriate if you're planning to fix your relationship.
The best way to decide what to do is to put the shoe on the other foot. Imagine you're keen on reconciling and while talking to your g/f she mentions that she "explored" with a couple of guys while you were separated. For me, that would be a deal-breaker.

Answer 4

A great way to get your ex back is https://tr.im/9Qvip

They might realize they need you and come crawling back!

If you do get back together, don't let the same issues that destroyed your relationship crop up again. Have a good, long talk about how you're both going to make it right this time.

Answer 5

If you separate and *fully intend* to get a divorce, then that’s one thing, because the marriage is definitely over in all aspects but the legal aspect (but even then I personally wouldn’t be sleeping with others). However, when the separation is for the purpose of 'figuring things out' that’s an entirely different matter. In that case, you need to be focusing on figuring things out/deciding what to do in regard to the marriage, not on meeting other people/exploring. Of course, that’s just my opinion.

Answer 6

I think it IS considered cheating, because you arent broken up and getting a divorce or in the process of one. You are figuring stuff out. If I was in the situation and then we knew we didnt want to break it off then wouldnt u feel like an ***?! Plus if I knew my seperation lead to infidelity I would leave his *** right then and there since he cant keep it in his pants.

Answer 7

It is considered cheating, you're married... not dating. You are legally married until you have that divorce filed. So if you're on a break, thats all it is, not a chance to have a fling and attempt to fee guilt free about it... Besides, think about it this way. You both need a break, you take one, you both have sex with other people, the wife becomes pregnant, the husband gets the other woman pregnant, y'all get some STD's, then try to work things out?? I doubt it! You should look at all angles here, the worse case possible... Then if you BOTH are willing and have an open policy, then that is up to you and your spouse. BUT, if you open up to other partners, you're opening a lot of other issues too.

Answer 8

Are you still married? YES!

Now you know the answer.

Separation is not to test the sexual waters. It is to find if your situation improves without your spouse. A separation is meant to be a trial period where the intent is to go back if you come to the realization that being apart is not the right idea.
It is incumbent on a separated person to become single first before moving to another.
Anything else is still cheating.

Answer 9

In my opinion when you separate it is to try to figure out what you want in life.
Trying to decide if you still want that marriage or not.
Well sometimes it takes seeing other people in order to figure that out.
So no, I do not feel that if you are seeing someone while you are separated, that it is cheating.
Seeing other people (while you are separated) sometimes is what makes you see what you want.
It will make you realize the person you are married too, IS really the best person for you.
Sometimes we don't see that until it's gone.
If you can really be with someone else, while you are separated, and be happy with someone else, then I think that is telling you that you should not be married.

Answer 10

I'd imagine that if monogamy is a part of your marriage, then cheating on a "break" to figure things out....means that you have. You figured you'd rather be single or at least in an open relationship.

Answer 11

You might not be physically together but I think your still emotionally connected otherwise it wouldn't concern you. If your planning on getting back together then sleeping with someone else is going to make that harder to do. I think if your plan is to do that then you should see her or ring her and tell her that you are going to see other women and that it's not about figuring things out, it's about wanting to be single again.