my hubby and i have problems really bad ones too. well since he doesnt like me starting conversations with him i seem to leave and look for others to talk to. i have blurted out many times that i wanted a divorce. theres so many things that he has done to me since we've gotten married. he takes me for granted and thinks i wouldnt do that to him,but he always does it to me. lately, i have been conversating with my old boss from work. i dont know if its just infactuation or what? but i always feel better when i talk to other men.i was just wondering over time wouldnt he notice me and realize what he has done? he always does bad things and then tries to turn it around on me. will he ever see what he once truly had? i've tried marital counsuling and that didnt work. he claims we dont have problems. he gets mad when i talk to others about our issues then he gets mad??? why? i dont know. what i am doing is it wrong? is he ever gonna see what its like to alone and lonely?
2007-10-09 18:31:46 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
This is your version , must get the other side's story and its reasoning. You should find out , what's bugging him and perhaps come to a compromise.
Looking at another side is a sign of looking for security and companionship. Watch your step.
2007-10-09 18:40:59 · answer #1 · answered by jjshri ram 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
sounds like my ex. I put up with that stuff for 29 yrs and finally told him to get out and from the looks of it now he is gonna be an old lonely man. He hasn't learned a thing since the divorce and I don't think he ever will. Good Luck and by the way I am as happy as I was before I got married.
2007-10-10 01:38:12 · answer #2 · answered by snakefinder41360 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
as far as getting mad about you talking with others about your issues, I can see his point. Those are private and you should always ask that person if its ok if you get outside advice. Also, it sounds like your communication between each other is really bad. Do you talk about everything with each other? He does sound insecure too, as well you have to make sure that your not looking for self worth in a man. When you said you always feel better when talking to a man, or getting attention from a man, a red flag went up. Both of you need to go to counseling that will deal with whats going on inside you, not just your love life together. Hope this helps. feel free to emal kathorismos at yahu
2007-10-10 07:10:00 · answer #3 · answered by kaiors23 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
since marriage counseling did not work, the next step is or should be divorce. he is a control freak and it sounds like he has you under his control. you feel better when you talk to other men because they pay attention to you but when you get a divorce don't get into another relationship until you have some time to yourself. You will find guys that you get along with but you need to build up a new confidence, or find again the confidence you had before marrying this guy and then you will find someone special who will share life with you and not tell you how to live it.
2007-10-10 01:50:42 · answer #4 · answered by Al B 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your marriage seems like heading for a divorce, He is pulling away and you are pulling away. The greatest problem you both have is one, lack of better communication. This is how it works if you want your marriage to work. Learn what to say, and how to say and when to say whatever you have in mind to him. Alway change your altitude, anger, hatred, or bitterness towards your man. Keep of outsiders and stop flirting with men. if you are flirting with men, your husband would consider you as a prostituted even if he don't say it because he see that he does deserve to be with you. If you love you man and want to work things out quit. Reevaluate yourself for the wrong doing, not him because for him it would come later if he see you changing. Even if it me, knowing what you are doing, I won't accept to be in such a relationship. Let it begins with you tonight to make these changes or otherwise if you all don't close the gap you are both creating, divorce might be on the way
2007-10-10 02:02:02 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all you should be selective as to who you talk to about your problems. You should be careful who you get advice from. You don't know what kind of agenda someone might have. If you love your husband then try to talk to him..You also have to remember men talk 1/2 as much as most women...If you talk to much eventually he is going to tune you out. I would work on only talking to him about important things...and try the "Cliff Notes" version of whatever the topic is....But don't start another chapter of your life...with another man until you close the last chapter, or your only going to make things more complicated for yourself.
2007-10-10 01:48:57 · answer #6 · answered by goody2shoes47677 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
think its a guy thing...that an he knows he is screwing up an might be losing what he had with you...jealous
2007-10-10 01:40:13 · answer #7 · answered by Annouyed 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋