How do I stop hating myself?

Question

I'm a 24 years old man. Basically, my problem is a walking cliché - I hate myself in a way I can't stop it. It's like an addiction to being miserable. I'm always concerned about weight and looks, always craving other peoples' atention and always searching for recognition. I work 10 hours a day just to prove I can do better than anyone else, I workout 2 hours a day because if I don't I can barely eat dinner from guilt and I do a lot of stuff from work when I come home. I barely pay atention to my friends or family. I have a huge problem with being made fun of (probably because I have really HUGE gay tendencies, but never got involved with a man) - if I get the least impression that I'm being made fun of, I go into a depression that's really hard to deal with.
The worst part is I recognize all of this - I know that most of what I'm doing is wrong. But I just can't help it. I can be happy now and miserable because someone made a comment that I assumed that was directed to me.

Answer 1

Until you resolve your past, and go through it and remove all the false beliefs you have stored about reality, you are not going to move.

I suggest doing some investigation to find out where some behaviors you exhibit were initially learned.

You overreact because you have not come to terms with a similar situation in the past. You have not allowed yourself to feel whatever way about them, so whenever something remotely similar to the original situation occurs, all the crap from the past is brought up again, you feel afraid and insecure and you overreact.

You want others to pay attention to you so you do not have to take care of yourself. Your self worth is low, I agree with the self-esteem work and a therapist suggestion.

It is a huge problem; do not dismiss it, its preventing you from being a happy and well-adjusted person. Fix it!

Answer 2

I have had the same problem...or close to it.
First of all, always remember that our perception of ourselves is always distorted. We are also our own worst critic.
Also, and just as important, other people's perception of who we are is also distorted....so much so that you can't rely on what other people think of you for what you should think of yourself.
A good example: I gave up a good paying job because the stress was killing me. Now I work as a delivery driver for a pharmacy that serves nursing homes. Many of the nurses I come in contact with think I'm some kind of under achiever.
They have no idea that I have an I.Q. of 130, attended college for 2 years, and that I learned how to play the guitar, the drums, and the harmonica without lessons.
In other words, people don't know dick about you, so try not to worry what they think.

Answer 3

Anyone who says anything about who u are and what u do and judges ANYONE in ANYWAY will meet ones self if not in this life, then the next one. Not for punishment but for soul development. U are who you are because your soul needs to understand this aspect of life and conquer theese ppl selfish and judgmental ways. As long as you dont get bitter and hate and start judging ppl then your soul will grow stronger wich might be why u are here write now.

Answer 4

Maybe you should stop taking the time out to think about the bad parts of life and start thinking about the good stuff in life. One day you want fill the pressure anymore because you will fill soo free and you would just want to let loose. God has something planned for you and you should take advantage of it. I promise if there is no one out there who cares I do. I will keep you in my prayers if you are on my mind. I hope the best for you. God Bless.

Answer 5

maybe you should see a counselor. you actually may have a problem that 'trying to be happy' can't fix. seeing a counselor will help.(i'm seeing one also) even talking to someone,like a friend, could help. also, keep faith in God. look towards him a things will get better!

Answer 6

It sounds like you've got MAJOR self-esteem issues. Perhaps you would benefit from seeing a good therapist.