If people's sexual preference is not a big deal, why do some call people that come out "brave", or "heroic?
And why is there the need to specualte about a person's sexuality? This person is gay, this person "may" be gay? If NOBODY cares, then why is this even an issue?
2007-10-09 06:51:28 · 15 answers · asked by Supercell 5 in Politics & Government ➔ Politics
Goldenrae: IF people can't accept you for who you ARE, they do you want them as friends?
2007-10-09 07:00:21 · update #1
I have to stick up for Goldenrae, here.
I think that you're trying to find a paradox that would either require that being gay IS a big deal, or that coming out is not brave.
Unfortunately, your paradox (although well constructed) doesn't necessarily consider the more complicated nuances of admitting to one's self to being gay, admitting to others, and finally attempting to develop some level of a normal life in the face of social adversity.
Remember that gays grow up in the same society as you. We hear and experience the same comments and social morays as you, and develop the same perspectives, often times being convinced (depending upon how important it is to fit in to a society) that there simply MUST be something wrong with us. (A very common condition called "internal homophobia." I, for one, fought for years to be straight. I prayed to God every night for quite a while when I was 12 or so that I would wake up straight.
When I finally did come out, my family was extremely supportive of me, as were my friends. Still, we all knew at that very moment that there were a significant number of people coloring the cultural norms that being gay was somehow seen as a weakness, a problem, or worse, a condition to be cured.
Thus, you see, people DO care. Even though they shouldn't. That's where the paradox breaks down. Yes, people shouldn't have to be brave to come out, but unfortunately, they do have to be brave.
I do, however, like to hear arguments like these because it forces me to think more thoroughly about my own views, and you have certainly done that.
2007-10-09 07:33:55 · answer #1 · answered by evanbartlett 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I understand how you feel exactly. I'm struggling with the same thing...why should I make a production about it. Almost everyone I know (except my family who lives thousands of miles away) already know, not because I walked into a room and said, "Hey! I'm gay!" but because they took the time to get to know me and learn about me, and being gay is a part of me. I think some people feel like making a big deal about it because it really is very liberating to be able to finally admit to everyone who you truly are, especially if you've been in denial about it for a long time. People are always going to tell you what to do. Just do what you are comfortable doing. The other people don't have to live your life.
2016-05-19 23:32:09 · answer #2 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It SHOULDN'T be a big deal, but unfortunately it is, especially in the workplace. If they know someone is gay before they get to know how good of a worker that person is, they automatically judge that person and can't get PAST the fact that they are gay. They immediately start picking apart every action and every word they say.
If someone comes out in the workplace, it shouldn't be done within a year of working there. Even THEN there's a possibility of losing their job. Someone should let their employers know how valuable they are at WORK, before they open up their personal lives to their coworkers. Unfortunately, this is a world of judgemental people who look for an excuse to hate.
2007-10-09 07:00:29 · answer #3 · answered by Listen_n 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
In a perfect world that might be true, but this is NOT a perfect world. Because of hate crimes against homosexuals. They happen all the time. The homosexual's family may not be supportive, that can be really hard. Or how about societal mores in the rural areas of this country? Whoever said that it wasn't a big deal lied. It is. And for that reason alone, I believe that no-one would CHOOSE that lifestyle.
2007-10-09 07:00:30 · answer #4 · answered by slykitty62 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
It is a big deal because many people care about someone being gay. It is the fear that they will no longer be accepted by the people closest to them, I can imagine it is a terrible feeling. It is brave becasue there are so many people out there ready to damn you to hell because of your sexual preference. I also think it is because they are saying, this is who I am and if you don't like it, it doesn't matter because I am not going to change.
2007-10-09 06:58:29 · answer #5 · answered by littleone 4 · 4⤊ 2⤋
Well, no one should care, but care they do. So in a place where it is OK for the president and congress to deny rights to people simply because they are gay, being publicly out is important.
2007-10-09 07:07:53 · answer #6 · answered by jehen 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Because unfortunately there are people in this society who constantly judge you if you are not like them. If you are not heterosexual there is something wrong with you.
I don't care either way who they choose to spend their time with. But there are people who will discriminate just because you aren't heterosexual.
2007-10-09 07:00:44 · answer #7 · answered by Spirish_1 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Because unfortunately, a whole bunch of people DO care! See Mathew Sheppard for instance.
2007-10-09 06:54:50 · answer #8 · answered by mommanuke 7 · 4⤊ 2⤋
People are nosy and love to gossip.
However, it is a big deal. I have been pursued by gays for a sexual relationship and to me, their attentions have been akin to acts of terrorism.
2007-10-09 06:59:23 · answer #9 · answered by wider scope 7 · 2⤊ 3⤋
People can lose their families and friends as this is a society wherein people of an LGBT identify are thought of as 'sexual deviants'.
Look at your own language to see why it might be difficult for someone.
2007-10-09 06:56:22 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 5⤊ 4⤋