2 and a half years sober and everyone still treats me like I just used yesterday OR they expect me to get high tommorow .
This is effecting my life. I have kids I would like to see. I feel like Im constnatly being judged on my past . Everyone always see me for what Ive done.
Not what I am now.
I m sober
I work
I go to college
I got custody for one of my kids
but whenever I ask for advice on how I get visitation rights with my other kids, they treat me like Ive been sentenced to eternal hell.
It hurts and I do cry .
Im crying NOW .
What more do you people want from me ?
WHAT ELSE CAN I DO ????
why is it so hard for people to stop looking at my past and judging me .Its like THEY WANT ME TO FAIL again . Why ?
Im not going to fail , but let me tell you its not easy to live this way with everyone against me.
sometimes I get depressed and Im always hurting on the inside. Im hurting because of how people treat me . Dont you see its not right ?
2007-10-09 05:31:17 · 26 answers · asked by Anonymous in Entertainment & Music ➔ Polls & Surveys
Hun all you can do is keep doing your best and people will come around eventually and realize that you are a different person now.
2007-10-09 05:35:09 · answer #1 · answered by DL 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
If those people think that way of you then it would be best forr you to stay away from them. My husband has the same problem. He has lived here his whole life, and everyone still thinks he uses. But he has been clean for 3 years. After a while, he says you just have to ignore them, there is nothing you can say to change their minds. Just keep pushing on, and doing what you know is right. And maybe one day they will wake up and see that they were wrong. If you ever need a friend to chat with I am here darling. Much love.
2007-10-09 06:18:04 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
WAY TO GO.... you are doing everything you can... look at all the positive responses and well wishes you have here....
recovery is a long process, and it does include the recovery of your family and friends.
just keep up the pace, be positive and strong. it is hard, but look at how far you have come, it is worth the fight.
if people are being too negative, try to remove yourself gently from the situation. try to write a note to your parents/friends and state what you have accomplished, and that their negativity is really affecting you. perhaps, slowly you can regain what you once had. maybe you can join a group activity and get out with people, to try to make new friends. join an exercise class, or painting... something you would enjoy.
i am praying for good things for you!!!! please post again and let us know how you are... the good thing about here, is that you can post everyday if you want!!!! also, think of the lives here that you can help with all your successes. i am sure you will be an inspiration to many people.
2007-10-09 06:08:17 · answer #3 · answered by suisse shoggi 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
5 and 1/2 years ago (5...you know... a whole 5 years, not 5 minutes) I attempted suicide. I'm still trying to get equal custody of my youngest son (psych evals next month). Every time the judge and the lawyers look at me, it's like they expect me to do it again as soon as I leave their sight. I haven't given any reason for them to believe that I'd do it again, I went on with my life, rebuilt my life, and am an awesome mom. My son's father has played it up something awful that I AM what I did, instead of what I did being a stupid decision that I had to learn from the hard way. I have him a lot more than what I used to, I've at least managed to make it difficult for his dad to keep him from me completely, but it still feels empty when he's gone, and I have to squelch the nausea in my gut often.
The only advice I have to give is don't give up. Keep getting up in the morning and taking on the fight again. LOOK for the next hoop they are going to throw at you, so you can jump through it as soon as they throw it. You WILL start gaining ground.
2007-10-09 05:49:45 · answer #4 · answered by Lady M 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
*Hugs* That must be frustrating.
Do you have friends and family that you feel comfortable confiding in that will let you vent when you're feeling this way? I hope you're not going through these feelings alone. Sounds like you're doing well and doing everything you can. Try to concentrate on the positives, congratulate yourself & pat yourself on the back for coming as far as you have. Block out all of those who try to hold on to the past, and if you feel like confronting them and saying 'Hey, look at me! I'm making changes for the better! Encourage me instead making it tougher.", then do it!
Keep going and don't give up hope, I'm sure so many people are proud of you, some times they just don't know how to express it and it comes out the wrong way. Good luck.
2007-10-09 05:40:38 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Thats so sad dear. =( Dont worry about what the ignorant A**wipes here say. Most of them dont know what its like to be a recovering addict. I was an addict so I understand what your going through. It is very difficult to get people to stop judging you for what you did and look at you for who you are today. =( If they had at all gone through it themselves they would know what its like and would not judge you for it. Forget about them. Keep your chin up. you know your doing good now. Your in school, working, you have one of your kids (you could go to a judge and probably get at least visitation rights for your other[s]), And the biggest part is your sober. That is something that you fought through and struggled against and you did it!! Forget about what all the self righteous A** hats think or say when they are up on their high horse. Be proud of yourself. You are the only person whos opinion about yourself matters. If you need someone to talk to I'm always here. email me any time. =) good luck
2007-10-09 05:57:46 · answer #6 · answered by Lorena 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you dont need to convince anybody. live one day at a time and make the next right choice. that is all you can do my friend. i struggle everyday with some of the same issues, however, if i allowed anything to get in the way of my sobriety i would lose. people dont want you to fail - they expect you to fail. that is the hard part of sobriety and recovery. you have to put it all out of your head and do what you know you need to do. it might take 20 years before somebody believes in you, but ultimately it does not matter. YOU determine your future now, not the drugs, not the people, not your family, not ANYTHING. its up to YOU. and i think you are doing a wonderful job. congrats on your recovery. keep hope in yourself and remember - easy does it.
2007-10-09 05:37:28 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
Please talk to a counselor. Perhaps you were on drugs for a long time and you hurt a lot of people. It is hard for them to trust you again. It will take time. I know that alot of time has passed but some people are afraid to trust you again. Sadly, some of them won't give you another chance.
Just be proud of what you have accomplished. You saved yourself despite the odds. Keep living a clean life and eventually, everyone will see that you have really changed.
2007-10-09 05:38:40 · answer #8 · answered by notyou311 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Listen to Grundle Goat. People don't want you to fail, they Expect you to fail. They have no idea of the pain we have survived or the person who evolved out of that pain. At two-and-a-half yr. I was going through the same stuff.
What you do is to BE that evolved person and keep walking that wonderful road of sobriety, one day at a time. You will prove them wrong. You are standing so tall and so beautiful RIGHT NOW. Just keep walking. Just keep walking Babe and remember you are loved.
Oh--watch out for the Pity Potty. It can get you too!
2007-10-09 06:50:05 · answer #9 · answered by Just Tink 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Give it time, you're pushing to hard, and to fast.
You've made good progress, but from what I've read, you still have a long way to go.
The world is not against you, you just view it that way.
And until you change that way of thinking you will continue to work against yourself.
You need to realize you've hurt a lot of people, and allow them time to heal.
The people who you think are against you are concerned for the ones around you, and have to err on the side of caution.
Good luck.
2007-10-09 06:14:25 · answer #10 · answered by ? 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
EDITED:
so sorry for your pain. I am so glad to see you are sober. drug addiction is a hard habit to beat. we see (mainly in the media..spears, lohan, sheen, etc) people all the time that go to rehab and then fall off the wagon. keep doing what you are doing. it will eventually fade, time is the only thing that will make this go away. you keep being sober. keep being a good mother. keep going to meetings. keep going to school. they will soon beleive that the 'new' you is hear to stay.
I am so proud of you!!!
2007-10-09 05:36:24 · answer #11 · answered by yvicks 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋