I have noticed that my 5-year-old son likes girly things!
He likes those damn Judy Garland slippers at Target.
He wants floral prints on his shirt.
He rolls his eyes in the Gay way!
He even runs like a sissy!
Our older son, who is 6, is all man!
He likes sports and refuses to wear floral prints and unless it’s blue or red he won’t put it on.
He is aggressive and competitive and fights with anyone who gets in his way.
He loves the movies Cars and Everyone’s Hero and Robin Hood.
The 5-year-old would rather watch Pocahontas or Little Mermaid!
What do you think?
Can I change his habits?
I am worried that our newborn will emulate this behavior, as he grows older!
How do I make him understand that his choices affect the whole family and reflect on my parenting in general?
Should I beat him?
How did this happen?
It is unnatural right?
Please help…I don’t understand where I went wrong.
How can we make our 6-year-old more like our 5-year-old?
2007-10-09 04:18:12 · 40 answers · asked by Glenn P 4 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
LMAO! I love it! If only the world could be so perfect. This is an art!
2007-10-09 07:40:37 · answer #1 · answered by urawhat21 2 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Being gay means you are sexually attracted to people of the same sex. Your five year old isn't sexually attracted to anyone yet.
Being gay does not mean you are masculine or feminine. There are masculine gay men and feminine straight men.
There is nothing wrong with a little boy wanting the things your son wants - and it doesn't mean he is gay. It just means he has decided that his father's warped sense of what it means to be a man is not what he wants for himself.
You need to learn to accept your son for the person he is. If you don't you will have a child who will either do things to make you even more angry or will stop being his true self and become depressed and sad. Do you want an angry or sad child?
Your son could be gay. But it is not something he has any control over or any awareness of yet. There is nothing you can do to change him. You can love him and accept him. If your son is gay what will help him more than anything else is to have a family that sticks by him and supports him. It is a tough world out there for gay people.
NO ONE chooses to be gay or becomes gay from a particular style of parenting. If your child is gay it is no reflection on you. It is not about you- it is about him. Some little boys like things little girls like and grow up to be masculine guys - I know I raised one of those little boys who loved Little Mermaid/ Sleeping Beauty/ Beauty & the Beast/ Cinderella and begged for barrettes, nail polish, Barbie dolls, and pom poms. He is now 24 and into women. And he still likes Hawaiian shirts!.
2007-10-09 04:39:57 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Please accept your 5 year old as he is.....for his sake and your own..this has nothing to do with your parenting...I do not believe this is a "choice" rather he was born this way. This only becomes a reflection on you if do not love him for who he is...unconditionally. Does it really matter that much? What is in his heart is what matters.....you need to contemplate this....the problem lies with YOU not him. Please keep an open heart and an open mind. This is your CHILD.... LOVE HIM WITH ALL YOUR HEART NO MATTER WHAT AND SUPPORT HIM WHETHER HE IS STRAIGHT GAY OR BISEXUAL. I never understood why so many people freak out about sexual orientation. That isn't who they are, it's who they prefer.
And this is coming from a "straight" lady with 2 kids, both boy and girl. If my son ever told me he was gay.....so what> who cares? He's my son. Daddy would probably have a problem with it, but again that would be HIS problem not my son's. And don't you dare beat him...that is absolutely ridiculous. You think can beat the feminine out of him? You really need to think on this one....maybe he came here to teach you to be more loving & open-minded, because it is a lesson YOU need to learn.
PS - and you're proud of the 6 year who is aggressive and fights with everyone.....guy you have it way backwards!
(((HUG)))
**Edit: I had a son who passed away as an infant - you should be thanking God every single day of your life you have a Healthy Child.
** Edit: Okay got the joke thought it was a typo...I am a little slow today. But my answer still remains, because sexual orientation doesn't matter to me one iota. We are who we are. Period.
2007-10-09 04:38:48 · answer #3 · answered by Freedspirit 5 · 4⤊ 0⤋
I hope to God that you are kidding with this question but just in case you aren't. Just because your kid likes certain things or doesn't like certain things doesn't make him a "real man" or "real gay" or real anything. A man is a lot more than solid colored shirts and action movies, if you son is gay, which he may or may not be I feel sorry for him living in your house. If he isn't gay then maybe he just likes different things, there are pleny of straight men who don't like action movies and beating people up to get what they want. As for your third child, let them be who they want, the harder you try to change them the more they will resist you, and honestly I hope they do resist you, the main problem with your parenting is that you won't let your children be different from one another, no two kids are the same, stop trying to control and just be there to guide them in life.
2007-10-09 04:25:52 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
You need to seek help, or you're going to destroy this child.
He is who he is. You are the one with issues that make you so critical of him.
As for a 5-year-old being "gay," well, he may turn out to be gay. But for you to be labeling him at such a young age is very wrong indeed.
Don't try to change him. Look inside yourself, and try to understand what's making you freak out.
*edit* OK, I get it. I actually just thought it was a typo, but apparently this is a trick question.
2007-10-09 04:57:23 · answer #5 · answered by Patrick C 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
5 is way to young to tell such things. At five he has no sexual impulses, and it is perfectly normal for kids to experiment and try out other things like playing dress up in clothing...Kids don't have any clear defined ideas of gender or sexuality if its fun they will do it and keep doing so till it gets old and they find somehtign else to do. And dancing is not a sign of being homosexual and neither is liking hannah montanna.
2016-03-19 08:36:32 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Every child is different. Just because the younger one enjoys The Little Mermaid over Cars does not mean he is gay. First, stop pressuring either one to be more like the other. They are both individuals, with their own unique likes and interests. You should try and find ways to encourage each child to develop his own talents, wherever they may lie. Why force a child into sports when he may be an artist?? Or are you the type of parent who will reject the artist for the jock?? Who knows, it may be your 6y/o "manly" son that ends up being gay. Does it really matter if either one turns out gay? They are both your sons, and they are both unique... and YOU, as the parent, should strive treat each individually.
2007-10-09 04:34:07 · answer #7 · answered by Tim A 6 · 1⤊ 2⤋
So, apparently your 6 year old is just like his dad,ready to use his fists to solve problems raather than his head. Wow, I am SO impressed with that. What a terrible disappointment that a 5 year old can make his Dad feel like he "failed as a man" because he happens to like girly things. What sort of pathetic lump are you?! Fighting doesn't make you more of a man, any more than the choice of colors he wears, the toys he chooses or happening to like flashy prints!
They are kids and they will develop differently because they are 2 different combinations of the genetic material you and your wife provided. The 5 year old may grow out of it or he may not. The 6 year old could find out that he'd rather fool around with the guys on his football team than instead of roughhouse with them. And as regards your "suggestion" about beating the 5 year old into changing, you are sick in the head for even thinking that would work!
Finally, I suggest you look up better information online as to whether or not homosexuality is unnatural or not. There is scientific proof that over 500 species of animals engage in homosexual activity. This includes penguins, swans, wolves and other species that mate for life, as well as herd animals and those species which use it as a means to show dominance (like in prison). My personal belief is that Gays and Lesbians were put on this Earth as a means of population control, since Homo Sapiens seems to have a problem controlling it's reproductive urges, but it's an opinion to which I am allowed by the Constitution. This is the 21st century, learn to educate yourself before resorting to outdated opinions and quack theories that have been disproved by real science. I wish your kids luck in their lives as they try to deal with growing up under you.
2007-10-09 04:56:56 · answer #8 · answered by prnigel 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
is it such a bad thing that your son might be gay??? let him be who he is. if you try change him he may hate you for it in later years. we live in a world where gay ppl are a lot more accepted. i have a nephew who loved barbies and sindy we let him carry on and despite being embarrassed to the high heaven about his youth he is now all man, infact too much sometimes as he has a dif girl every day. let your son make his own choices and good goddont beat him. he cant help who or what he likes.
2007-10-09 04:25:24 · answer #9 · answered by gemsi27 2 · 2⤊ 1⤋
I HAVE to assume you're just trying to rile up the feathers here on yahoo... because you can't possibly be serious...
for those that think there IS any credibility to this line of thinking however...
I think that parents who try to manipulate and force their children to be someone they're not are doing a HUGE injustice to society... you can't MAKE someone like football who likes violin... and nor should you try... there are little girls who will NEVER want to wear a frilly pink dress... there are little boys who will NEVER want to touch a football... and there's NOTHING you can do about it... and nothing you SHOULD do about it... Humans are much more complex than the shallow stereotypes we keep trying to stuff everyone into... so just STOP IT!!...
2007-10-09 05:00:15 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
It is what it is.
It sounds like you are upset and disgusted that he might be gay.
You are his father and no one else, if he did turn out to be gay, you of all people should not be the first to condemn him for who he is.
As you can see for yourself it isn't a choice that is made in life.
You should maybe do a little research about how to deal with it as a parent and maybe you should be a little more understanding. And let me say, making references such as:
-Sissy
-Gay way
is not cool.
Please do not make your child hate you or even himself just for who he happens to be.
There is nothing wrong with you child...love him and talk to him and dig deep to find out how he is feeling inside.
he may be young but he still has feelings...that he can express if you even care to know.
Don't be negative and derogatory towards him.
Be inviting to him and let him feel comfortable to talk to you.
It might just be a little phase...if not be ready to know how you should handle it(situation)/him.
**You can not beat the "gay" out...that would be abuse**
**Since when did whom your child decided to love reflect your parenting skills~that would be an insecurity that you would have to deal with**
Im pretty sure that you are a wonderful parent....Family is where someone should feel loved and accepted...then they would be able to deal with society's put downs....if they can't get that at home then it's down hill from there.
**Read about it....suicidal gay & lesbian adolescents, homeless gay and lesbian youths....**
Join a group for Parents of Gay & Lesbian youths...go to counseling...Do something positive!!
Do not PUNISH your son for something that he has no control over...YOU will regret it in the long run. He might end up hating you!!
Think about it! Talk to him!! Research!!
2007-10-09 04:41:07 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋