15 years old and 8 weeks pregnant?

Question

Well...I am 15 years old and 8 weeks pregnant. i really dont no what to do because im like really confussed. Yes i have told my mum and dad and they did say they would support me and so did my boyfriend (but they all say that). I Dont really like the idea of an abortion as i think i would regret it alot, and i also dont like the idea of adoption as i think i would think when im older how are they and all them type of questions. I do plan on carrying on at school as my mum said she would look after the baby, but im not sure if im ready to be a mum.
And please no sarcastic comments. Thanks x

Answer 1

You are very lucky to have understanding and supportive parents. It must be a very stressful time for you. I do not want to advise in favour of or against abortion because only you will know what is best for you but make sure you talk everything through with those who love you and want the best for you.

Good luck.

Answer 2

Ok, look at it as it is. You're pregnant and soon to give birth, you want to carry on in education but no to adoption and no to abortion. (By the 8 week stage, you can't have an abortion anyway) I don't think it's fair for you to land the baby on your mum - you're the mother, it's your child. If it were me, (I'm 16), I would have the baby and do part time work to get as much money as possible. When I had enough and had asked the family to dip in and buy things for the baby, you should get your boyfriend to also get a part time job. I think it's a bit late to think about not being ready to be a mum - you're in this together with your boyfriend and you can do this. I would muddle my way through my gcse's and think from there on. You could try saving and getting money from wherever I could to get the baby into childcare and continue on at school. If you want to continue into education, why not go to college and do some courses after you've settled with the baby. I wish you all the best of luck and I know you'll make the right decision - I bet you'll be a better mum than you think imagine that feeling you get when you look at your baby for the first time. Ok, so things haven't gone the way you'd hoped but life's like that and you'll get through it in the end.

Answer 3

It's a bit late to feel ready or not. You have to make yourself ready to be a mom. Maybe your just confused because you don't know what to expect and that makes you feel unsure. You need to start taking care of the baby now while you are carrying it. Eat a lot of vegetables and fruit and all the good things it takes to make a healthy baby. Your child will look to you for wisdom so definitely keep up your education. I'm so glad you have your parents there to help you out. Thank God every day for them. When you have this baby, so many things will come to you naturally but the things you don't know, make sure you ask your parents or call a nurse. You'll figure it out. I don't know which part you don't feel ready for. If it is because you still want to live your life as before you got pregnant, that's over now. You will be a parent responsible for everything about your child. I think you will see that after you have this baby, you will be ready for it and it could very well be the best thing that has ever happened to you. I was 16 when I had my first daughter and 18 with my second daughter. They are now 24 and 22 years old and definitely the best thing that has ever happened to me. Allow your mother to watch the baby while you go back to school, you'll have a hard time getting ahead if you don't finish. Take care of yourself and your baby. I wish you the best.

Answer 4

So much to go through at 15 its so not fair. Only you can make the decision of what to do but you need to get proper information so you can make an informed decision. I do not judge any girl for adoption,termination etc as your not in their shoes. I will say though you are only 15 and though you have support its a huge life change ahead if you decide to keep the baby. its not just the going out with friends, and having boyfriends that you miss out on it can be your whole self discovery of finding out who "you" are. My sister terminated a pregnancy after the boy left her,it was hard but ended up being the responsible and most sensible thing in the end. She is now happily engaged with a 2 year old and doesn't regret the hard decision she had to make when she was younger. No one any age is ever "ready" to be a mum but at 15 you have every right to feel that. If you can't give the best life you can to your child you have to think what is best in this case. If you continue and have the baby your family will be ther to support you and thats a good thing but it won't be easy let me tell you. I hope you can make the decision that will be best for you in the end what ever the reason.You are important too.

Answer 5

You're in a very difficult situation! As a mum myself, I know how hard bringing up children is but there are good points too! What makes it worse is that you're only 15 and have the best time of your life ahead of you which could be jeopardised with the responsibility of a small child. You are quite right what you say about abortion and adoption which is why this is so hard. But you've also got to consider your freedom that you'll be giving up as babies need round-the-clock care 7 days a week - no breaks, no holidays, no sick days! Your parents say they'll support you but will they get up for it 2 or 3 times in the night, every night? Look after it all day while you're at school as well as afterwards when you're doing homework or socialising down the town with your mates? Will they look after it at weekends and a Friday and Saturday night so you can go down the pub or go to parties? No, because it's too much! (35 hours a week just covering school time). They'll maybe look after it so you can continue at school and do homework (which is a lot) but your free time will have to be spent on your responsibilities.

I'm not going to tell you what decision to make because you need to make it yourself. I've only told you the above so you can make an informed decision as whatever you decide will affect the rest of your life.

Ask your parents as to just how much help they're thinking of giving as this could affect your decision, then weigh up the pros & cons and only then must you decide what you're going to do. Make sure it's your decision! Good luck!

P.S. Everyone here has their opinions on what you should do but with all due respect, they arn't the ones that will have to live with the outcome - you are.

Answer 6

before you make this life changing decision you need to think about a few things....
Once the baby is born you will no longer be a "15" yr old. All of your teenage years are gone. You will find that you don't have much in common with other girls your age. Having a baby consists of more than sleepless nights. That baby has to become your number one. Instead of thinking about what movie you're going to see or what your friends are doing next weekend you will be worried about changing diapers and what time your baby has to eat next. you have to put all of your wants and needs aside for your child because he or she will be your responsibility for the next 18 years. Your boyfriend has no obligation to you or the baby so he could up and leave at any moment. I'm not trying to give you the typical speech.. i'm just trying to make you think.. I had my son when I was 17 years old. I wanted to do the right thing so i decided to keep him.. It was and is very hard. There were many times i wondered.. how can i take care of a child when i can't even take care of myself????...and i felt guilty because i couldn't give him all of the things that maybe adoptive parents could have. I am now 20 and my son is 3. Even though it has been hard I wouldn't trade my son for the world. I have grown to be so much stronger through the past few years, and I am now in my 2nd year of college. Don't let anyone's ignorant comments get you down. You can get through this. Good luck with whatever you choose to do!

Answer 7

First off congratulations!!

Having a baby is a life-changing event, no matter the age.

Please don't listen to those who tell you that you're stupid, your life is over, etc. That's really not true. Especially if you have a great support system (which it sounds like you have).

I'm 27 years old with 3 children. I had my first child at age 15. I'm still with the father and we've been married for 6 years. I will be entering Law School next year and we live a very comfortable life.

Was the beginning hard, yes? But it can be done. Having a baby doesn't mean the end of your life. Yes, it delays it, but by no means will your life be over. Continue to go to school; that's the most important thing. Please don't sacrifice your education.

Are there programs in your area for teen Moms? They can be great resources for learning how to cope with things.

Good luck in whatever you decide. And never let anyone sway you from what you feel in your heart.

Answer 8

I congratulate you for speaking with your parents about it.

My own opinion is, at 15 years old your body itself is still developing, and you have not even experienced life. But what is life about? Lessons, experiences, each is as individual as the person.

You are asking good questions about how would "I feel" if I had an abortion, put the baby up for adoption. You have to also include how does your boyfriend feel. Although you are the one one carrying the baby he also is becoming a father. I hope he supports that role.

This is not an easy thing to experience, especially at such a young age. Finish school, yes, I have to agree with you there. Let your mother help you, she has already said she would. You will have to grow up fast, as your child is dependent on "you" 24/7. It's not a game, and it's not something cute (a fashion statement). It sounds like you realize that.

Take a deep breath. Get the prenatal medical attention you need. Don't be afraid to ask for help (this is key). Whether that is emotionally or otherwise. A school counselor perhaps? Someone that is neutral and not in the family.

Whatever you decide you have to be able to live with that decision for the remainder of your life. Good Luck to you. You will be okay, believe it, feel it, and it will come to pass in time.

Answer 9

Hi there honey, I dont blame you for feeling that you r not ready to be a mum, you r probably thinking that your life has ended. Well it is just beginning and you sound sensible too. Your mum and dad will help you a lot and they do mean it. You are only 8wks pregnant and im glad you have tld your mum and dad. My best friend fell pregnant at 14 and told her mum at 6mths as she couldt hide it no more. she is 24 and has 3 kids now and is a fantastic mum and a qualified nurse now. I have an 8mth old wee girl and its the best thing thats happened to me and my family. The thing is you are not ready to be a mum because it was not planned and no matter what age you are honey you would not be ready no one would be if it was un expected. You will be fine i promise. and you will be a good mummy too i believe in you. xx take care xx

Answer 10

Hi Ya
Life's one tough cookie, regarding adoption I was adopted and I wouldn,t change a thing . I have found my real mum and she,s like a sister now.
The reason I was put up for adoption was she was only 15 back in the late 60s it wasn't the done thing.
I,am not going to tell you what to do, but I hope this helps
Good luck x x x

Answer 11

only u can say whether u are ready to become a mum, its really good that your parents are supportive, both my daughters got pregnant at 15 and have proved to be great mothers and also they are still with their partners who stood by them , and on another note one of them recently had an abortion due to circumstances and she really regrets it now, so take the time to look at what u want to do for the best , remember its your life. hope u make the right decision good luck,