Have any of you experienced this?
2007-10-08 17:39:11 · 20 answers · asked by Melissa R 4 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Senior Citizens
Beaten path? Do you mean down the wrong track? My kid has been down the wrong track with needles and crack pipes but I dont think it reflects on me, I refuse to let it.
2007-10-08 17:50:19 · answer #1 · answered by cats mother 3 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Sorry don't understand the term "beaten path".
If you're talking about grown children who have a different lifestyle, maybe make poor choices, etc., well, first off give them a chance to grow up. Just because we're adults doesn't mean we have enough life experience until we're about 40 to actually pull our heads out of our navels and get on track. It takes a long time to make good decisions and you have to make a lot of bad ones along the way and get into a lot of holes.
We as parents, watched over them and protected them and saw them to adult survival. After that, they're big people making their own way. They will reap what they sow like everybody else. If they choose poorly, they'll have poor resutls. If they choose well, they'll be fine.
Pray and Pray and Pray. Love them the best you can where they're at, and leave the rest in God's Hands and hope they grow up all the way someday and get a grip!
Isn't being a parent just so glamorous!!!
(we never did this to our own parents did we????)
2007-10-11 16:08:10 · answer #2 · answered by autumlovr 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Im not a parent but i think even though some people might blame the environment they live in, the friends, school, tv, the internet etc. i think that the parents should always be the first ones to know whether their children are moving towards a certain path, be it good or bad. I guess there's no such kid that doesnt shout for help to their parents when their lives are slowly falling apart, whether its showing signals on how they talk, or how they act... but ofcourse as a son, ill never blame my parents for not always being there for me... and it always makes me feel secure to even just know that they really do love me.
2007-10-09 06:45:11 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think most parents do the best they can raising their children and want them to be happy, productive people. Children can be raised in the same home and take very different paths in life. We just have to keep loving them and hope they will remember the values they were taught. I know there were times I disappointed my parents. My daughter had her moments as a teen, but she's got a home, works, goes to college, and we're very close now.
We may wish we'd done things differently, but did the best we knew how at the time. One thing is certain, whatever we do as parents, someone will be around in 20 years telling us we did it the wrong way. Just do the best you can now and things may get better in the future. Best wishes.
2007-10-09 02:07:47 · answer #4 · answered by luvspbr2 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Not sure what you mean by 'beaten path' but two of my children lead lives that I wish were different.
But to answer your Q. NO as long as you can say in your heart that you did the best possible for them given the circumstances you were in.
As parents we do/did what we thought was right at the time with what we had. children dont realise the struggle we had to raise them.
Its not easy being a parent and a partner and a individual with our own life.
At least mine once they had their own children realised this. My son did have a time when he blamed me for his mistakes but now he is a parent he understands.
I told him that if in the later years with hindsight we think we could have done better some times then sorry for your hurt but move on.
Don't worry be content with yourself and move on. check out my Q where I pasted on the Desiderata poem. Its beautiful.
Go placidly!!!
2007-10-09 01:06:51 · answer #5 · answered by ? 4 · 4⤊ 0⤋
No,it does not reflect on the parent, we raise them to the best to our ability,and when they choose the wrong path from what as a parent have teached them,My son has chosen the wrong path,when that happened,I told him I love him but he put himself there,no matter how many times I have talked to him,well he put himself there so he has to get himself out of it,proudly to say,he is going on the right track now and I am a very happy and proud parent,Good luck
2007-10-12 08:58:40 · answer #6 · answered by dork 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I sometimes feel like my children's behavior reflects on me; not that I'm the sole influence, but that I played (and continue to play) an important part in their lives. I can acknowledge mistakes I made, say I'm sorry to them, and then forgive myself. I can also tell them when I think they are being unjust about things I did or didn't do. They are running their own show, I play a supporting role. Other parents have done things differently, but I don't think that necessarily means better.
2007-10-09 09:43:57 · answer #7 · answered by ? 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
We do the best we can with what we have at hand. When we know better we do better. Having made a multitude of mistakes as a too young Mom w/o any good parenting skills learned from my own parents I was honest with my oldest kids and aske for forgiveness for where I went wrong and try to keep an open dialog with them to discuss better ways of coping that were self taught by them.
Almost everyone gets to an age of accountability and then it is them reaping what they sow. So unless you molested your children you did the best you could.
2007-10-11 14:40:12 · answer #8 · answered by Southern Comfort 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It is no reflection on the parents. We begin to lose control of our kids somewhere along the age of 13. Their peers have greater influence. In the child's mind you don't know what you are talking about so they consult the experts of the world. The genius's of the world. That is, other 13 and 14 year olds. And they carry that mentality that their parents know nothing, right deep into adulthood. Very few come around to admit they screwed up.
2007-10-09 06:29:57 · answer #9 · answered by Tinman12 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I believe any guilt you feel as a parent when your child does something you consider wrong or inappropriate is natural BUT if you have raised your children the best you could, then there is no guilt. In my experience with my 3 sons, they have all made mistakes, nothing extremely serious like breaking the law and going to jail, but behavior I did not approve of but the older they became, they came back to most of the values I tried so hard to instill in them. We are best friends now that they are out on their own and I have tremendous respect for them as productive people!
2007-10-09 00:52:43 · answer #10 · answered by chestnutlocs1 4 · 4⤊ 0⤋
I think, that if we have done our jobs well, it is for our children to decide what they will do in life. It seems that in today's age, fewer are willing to take risks, preferring the tried and true...sadly, they miss the excitement of going where no man has gone before...that seems to have died when our generation became too old to have the energy required for daring risks and taking the consequences. I have beaten my own path my entire life, am no further along in it than those who followed tried and true venues...but I will admit, I have had one hell of a good time in my life...sadly, I do not see this in today's youth, or even in my kid's life. Perhaps we really were children of the age of Aquarius? Who knows. Goldwing
2007-10-09 11:27:55 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋