Do you really think you are not vulnerable to temptation?

Question

Please don't take this wrong, but I keep reading from women who say how wonderful their marriage is and they or their spouse would never cheat or lie or deceive. Don't you think most people felt that way at one time? Many of the people tell you, after 23 or 25 years of marriage their spouse is having an affair? Do you really think you are the 'chosen ones' and this could never happen to you or by you? Isn't there vulnerablility to this for everyone? Can you really say 'he will never' or 'I will never'? (Thanks for your answers - just wondering)

Answer 1

You never know what life has in store for any marriage or what its future could be up against. We all start out with hopes and dreams and belief in each other...only to wake up one day when the love of your life chooses to change your world. People are ever changing through the years and often take each other for granted. We get caught up with the children, finances, work, going through the same old routines day after day untill we almost feel like strangers to one another. This is where marriages are left wide open and vulnerable for even the most trust worthy spouse to fall to the way side. I believe the longer you are married and not paying attention and taking time for one another you are vulnerable to temptation especially if someone pays attention to you and you feel that you are not getting it at home.Women go through hormonal changes at menopause and just when that seems to settle down men may go through a midlife crisis .....this is the most dangerous time for any marriage. The young couples that are just starting out fresh and new are unaware of what their marriage may have instore for them because they are not there yet ....So my feeling is you can only hope that you are the choosen one because if you are not you can't know untill you get there. I have learned in my life that you can't say never to anything in life because just when you do what you least expect can happen.

Answer 2

Let me say first that it has nothing to do with being the "chosen one." Being in a secure marriage does not make me feel superior to anyone. Also, I am not one of those people who believes that it could never happen to me - it has. I was married. We were highly incompatible. He cheated. We divorced. I am remarried. We are friends. He is faithful.

I do believe that it is entirely possible for 2 people to remain faithful to each other. For this to happen there has to be real love ivolved, but there also has to be respect. Often, people who find themselve cheating or cheated on, find that their marriage was lacking in one of those things.

Another thing is, marriage is hard so if you don't keep working on it, that love and respect will eventually die. I can say that I will never, ever cheat. If I someday find that I am no longer happy in my marriage, I will end it. I don't think that's going to be a problem, but just for the sake of argument. My husband has the same philosophy. If you want to leave, you leave, but you NEVER cheat. That's just the way we feel about it. So I believe he will never cheat either, and I hope that he never leaves.

The main difference between our marriage and that of many people I know, is that we are friends (and were for a long time before marrying) not just spouses. I know people are rolling their eyes, but not everyone cheats. That just is NOT true, and a good marriage has little to do with money or physical appearance. (And, no, neither myself nor my husband are rich or drop dead gorgeous. Well, I think he's pretty good looking, but that's my opinion.)

I say all of this because too many people are giving up on the idea of marriage. Too many people are willing to settle for less than they deserve. As a spouse, you have the right to expect your husband/wife to be faithful. You are entitled to this. Don't settle.

Answer 3

Can I say for sure... no. I suppose not. But, I feel like we have a good marriage, and we talk about everything. He comes right home from work, and I'm right here when he does.

I guess all we can do is hope for the best. I know for sure, right now that neither of us is out looking for someone else. We are still totally in love, so I don't worry at all.

I can definitely say though, I NEVER WILL. Cheating runs rampant in my family, and it makes me ill. I'd leave my husband before I'd ever be in a situation where I'd cheat on him. And, I'm definitely not the "get drunk and accidentally have sex type." I think my husband feels secure knowing that every day I'm here is a day I choose to be.

Answer 4

Sure there is vulnerability in everyone but if a person has morals and tries to follow God's plan to the best of their ability, they will fight the temptations when they come along.

I had several married men approach me but I firmly told them "NO" up front and reminded them they were married and off limits. I never let myself get caught up in situations where something might happen with someone.

I completely trust my husband and he trusts me. We are more concerned about losing our souls for eternity and won't get caught up in situations like this that will lead us astray.

I "never say never" when it comes to other things in life but on this one, I can say I will NEVER cheat on my husband or open doors of opportunity that could cause me to be unfaithful and I know my husband is a firm believer that way, too. We all need to keep ourselves in check but unfortunately, so many let that door open and they run right through without thinking of the consequences.

Answer 5

I may or may not ever get married, but while I cannot control the other person's actions, I do have complete control over my own, and I would rather get a divorce instead of sneaking around behind someone's back. If I cheated on someone, I would feel horribly guilty for the rest of my life, plus I have been hurt by other people and can't imagine myself hurting others.

Answer 6

awww.....how sweet. Love the I won't, he won't scenarios. Did you happen to hear the interview with Kate Hudson (blonde actress, Goldie Hahn's daughter) she said during her interview that "men are going to cheat. she realizes it, and accepts it, as that's just the way they are". Now I can understand why she would feel that way. She brings no money to the table (being an actress and all), she has a huge behind (size 2?), no personality and is dreadful to look at (she's ADORABLE) ....who wouldn't cheat on her?. The rest of us must be completely safe! Don't worry about a thing!

Answer 7

Right now I feel as if I wouldn't cheat and I feel that my husband wouldn't either. I am not naive enough to say that it couldn't ever happen, never. Although I don't think that I would... I have learned from experience that EVERYONE can be tempted. Some people are just to smart or 'good' to admit to being tempted. I hope and pray that if either one, me or my husband, are ever tempted we are strong enough not to give in to it. Only time will tell........

Answer 8

Over the course of our relationship, jobs took my husband and me to different states for a total of about 2.5 years. Even though we weren't even engaged yet, at no time did I have any interest in any other guys, in spite of the fact that at least one guy made it very clear that he was interested in me.

My heart goes before my body goes, and I don't share my heart easily. I already tried the "in love with two guys at once" thing while I was in college. Both guys knew about it and didn't have a problem with it, but it drove me crazy and I ended up breaking up with one of them. So I have no qualms about saying that no, I don't ever see myself in a situation where I would be tempted by another man.

Answer 9

Nope, I do NOT believe that it's impossible for me OR my spouse to stray. There's always a possibility. I'll do my best to keep our marraige happy, and hopefully that will lessen the chances, but you're right - it's naive of anyone to assume that there's a 0% chance.

Answer 10

anyone is at risk for tempation no mater who that person is . but it depends on will power on this matter my opion?