Why do we spend so much time obsessing over how women dress?

Question

This was inspired by the "why do women show their cleavage" question. To which I would like to respond "why is this a big deal? Personally, I barely notice a little cleavage, provided it stops short of a nipple popping out. And yet, I see so many questions asking why do women wear this?? Why do women wear that?? Undoubtedly followed by "she must not respect herself! "That must be all she has going!" Really...seems like a lot to read into a shirt.

Do we need to psychoanalyze any woman who's not completely covered from neck to toe?

Answer 1

i think the judgment of women based on their appearance is indicative of a larger problem. it seems like all of society, feminist and non-feminist, feels the need to critique and judge a woman based on how "respectable" or "sexy" her clothing is. this basically makes a woman nothing more than an object. what people need to realize is this: even if a woman looks like pamela anderson, she can still respect herself. look at dolly parton! there is a strong, influential woman who is amazingly talented and interesting. certainly, by any standard, she has too much surgery etc, but so what! what's on the outside shouldn't matter so much. allowing women to look how they want to look-no matter if that look is "slutty"-was part of the idea behind feminism in the first place! women should be themselves, and clothes shouldn't matter!

it seems most in society buy into the sexist idea that a woman is an object completely defined by her looks.

Answer 2

In my professional field we have a term for behavior like compulsive shopping...it's called a process addiction. It's possible for some folks to get addicted to things that make us feel good..and shopping can make people feel good, at least initially. You know it's a problem if you spend money you really can't afford to spend and you do it more than just once in a great while. If you find yourself setting limits and then exceeding them, attempting to avoid going into certain kinds of stores, or hiding/destroying receipts and purchases (evidence of your spending), or lying about your spending, and it's impacting your life (and possibly the lives of the ones you love) in an adverse way- you've got a shopping addiction. Interestingly, spending money (getting things you desire) can release chemicals in the pleasure center of the brain (the limbic system) just like psychoactive drugs do. That's where addiction comes in. Internet addiction is also a process addiction...as is addictions to eating, working, exercise, gambling, and sex.

Answer 3

I have a friend who takes it upon himself to completely psycho-speculate about any person he sees, as if he is any kind of yardstick.

This is the passive-aggressive version of public bullying, because the person doing the idle speculation is always compensating for their own raging, denied insecurity, and do so in a fashion where they will never actually have to face the person they are using as an emotional stepping stone. And that is a good thing, because said individual, were they personally faced with said criticism could all too easily tear the commentor apart.

Answer 4

I typed out a long winded response, but everyone who would get it already does get it.

So I'll just say, neither the way I dress or the value of my self-worth is dependent on the opinions of others. If men want to delude themselves into believing that my outfit is for them, then let them be deluded. They don't want to know the truth, so let them live in the fantasy that women think the way they do and want what they want.

The problem is with them. We should change because they don't like the way it makes them feel? Not hardly. We should be hurt that they don't want make us their wives? AS IF.

Candice: Sure if someone looks like a police officer then you assume they're a police officer, but I wasn't aware that prostitutes had uniforms. Slutty is pretty subjective. When a woman sees a model wearing an outfit and thinks it looks fashionable she has a right to wear it without other people crossing the line by harassing her. You don't assume she's a prostitute unless she asks to trade sex for money, because that's the only real indication that she is in fact a prostitute. It doesn't matter if you assume she's promiscuous, because unless she's offering herself to you, it's just none of your business.

Answer 5

Smile. Because it is so much easier to attack women ( all women ), than deal with their own insignificant and lonely existence. Because of misery and constant year after year rejection from every female he ever met ( including his mother ). Because of never ending envy for something he could never have... A pretty pathetic business... don't you agree?

Answer 6

If you dress like a police officer, people are going to assume you´re a police officer. And if you dress like a wh0re, people are going to treat you as such.

Don´t get me wrong. I agree with you. I think that everyone (men and women included) should be able to dress however they like. If it´s hot, why not be able to wear a tube top and a mini skirt? Despite that, I have to except that how I dress myself affects what people think of me, and I want to project myself accurately. Image is important. It´s just something you´re going to have to accept.

Answer 7

Because the female body is considered public property. Everybody feels entitled to express to you what you should do with it, from the way you dress, to the way you walk or who you decide to give it to. Anything that has to do with you getting pleasure or your personal enjoyment involving your body is fair game for our "owners." You don't follow their rules, you're a worthless s.lut with no self-respect or worth. And interestingly enough, fear of harassment, judgement and prejudice has made women prisoners of their own bodies---we simply allow them to control us.

Did you want me to get into details? Or is that enough?

Answer 8

It's a way to place blame onto the person being objectified.

"Well if she doesn't want to get honked and hollared at, she shouldn't dress like that"

(Yeah y'know OR you could just learn to control youself)

Answer 9

No, I don't think women should dress like they did during the Victorian era. However, something women should understand (and it seems that many don't) is that the way they dress projects volumes about the type of person they are.

Now to fend off the feminist outcry, this does go for men too, however since men's fashions are considerably more limited, it is not such an issue.

Basically it is the question of how a women wants society (and usually men) to view her. It kinda goes along w/ the saying - "if it looks like a duck, and walks like a duck.........". So when a women dresses trampy, she is projecting an image of sexual availability/easy access, whether she wants to or not. I mean, you can't think that J Lo just thought she was wearing an ordinary ol' dress those many years ago when she showed up in that glued on barely-a-gown she wore.

A women can't expect respect if she dresses like a ho. I look at some of the very young girls today that are barely wearing enough fabric to cover the essentials and find myself thinking "how can their parents allow them out of the house dressed like that". They are just asking for trouble.

Yes Devils Advocette, that is the same stupid attitude that gets most women in trouble. They all think they should be able to dress anyway they want but only the George Cloony's and Brad Pitt's are allowed to gawk at them. The rest of us mortals should just ignore them even if they are 75% naked.

BTW Devils Advocette, that's rather CS of you to block everyone who's ideas you don't like or agree with. Don't worry, I don't want to answer your man bashing questions anyway.

I can see by all the thumbs down that a lot of vindictive (and clueless) women are reading this.

Answer 10

You might be right that people shouldn't be making all these comments/judgments, but the fact is that they do. If you don't want people to be thinking/acting this way, then you should dress modestly.

I think women sometimes don't understand what is going through a man's mind. If they did, they wouldn't dress the way they do and expect that men would not treat them like sex objects. If you want to be treated seriously, either as a man or a woman, you have to dress so that people will take you seriously.

Yes, people are superficial and judgmental. That is unfortunately the world we live in. I know you want to change what everyone else is thinking, but I'm not sure if that is realistically going to happen real soon.

Best wishes.