What should I do with this Restraining order?

Question

I am about to receive a restraining order, I don’t want to go to court. I don’t care if this girl gets one on me, I know I was wrong, nothing violent, but just emails and text since we broke up. What will happen if I don’t show up for court? I don’t care what she says about me, the judge is going to order the same RO either way. So why should I go to court I will just have a bad attitude? I don’t care if I ever see her again, and yes I lied to her and will get it either way, so what is the difference? This is not a criminal matter so what difference does it make? We have no kids, and live in the same state. I just want all of this to be over so why should I go to court?

Answer 1

You need to know what the terms of the order are to avoid violating it. There will probably be some places you are not allowed to go. I don't think you should have to appear in court if you are not contesting the order. It can't hurt to ask the court clerk this question. They will know better than we do.

Answer 2

IANAL, but I think if you don't go it will be entered into by default. I expect you will be served notice of the result the same way you were served notice of the hearing inthe first place, but who knows?

Why go? Out of respect to the court, out of the chance that you might do something stupid agian in the future and having this on your record could come back to haunt you.

If all you did was sendsome emails, and you have no prior history, then maybe the judge won't grant the order if you bother to mount a defense, or at least you will get a less restrictive one.

Maybe the girl is just nuts and you want ot be done with her, but if the emails were not threatening, even if (a bit) excessive in tone or number, that in and of itself may not be enough to get her the RO.

Unless you don't even bother.

And if she is full of it and has gone this far, once she has the RO, what is to stop her form claiming you violated it in the future?

When you defend yourself against that, the fact that you didn't even contest the original RO is going to count against you big time. and no judge or cop at that point is going to listen to a word about your complaints then - you made the decision of your own free will, and the decision will not be re-visitable.

I would say if youwant it to be over, then go to court and play ball. Or at least invest in an attorney who will speak on your behalf to her attorney, and they can work out something realistically that doesn't likely include a court action.

Answer 3

You should go to court, to defend yourself and present your side of the story, if it was just texts and emails, she can't get a restraining order unless you threatened violence. If she does get a restraining order, you have a black mark on you. Every time your DL is run or a background check is run, in big letters at the top of your report it will say that you are under a restraining order and out of what jurisdiction. You will be assumed to be violent and unpredictable. You should not blow this off if there is nothing to it.

Answer 4

Text messaging and e-mails is considered harassment just as it is had all of this contact been done on the phone. It is illegal and if you don't care about her, why would you want to spend time in the pokey for her. Go to court or they will put a warrant out for your arrest. Go to court and act like a civil human being. Don't spout off.

Answer 5

You need to go to court or you may get a bench warrant out for your arrest.

Answer 6

Just make sure you follow all the terms set forth in the order, if you dont it will be criminal

Answer 7

F*ck with her head a little... Like invite her over and stuff then when she shows up call the cops.

Answer 8

Not getting thrown in jail for "failure to appear" might be one good reason.