I was just wondering - my cousin is due to have her 2nd baby in a couple months - and people in our family want to throw her a baby shower (she had a huge one for her 1st baby too, which was a boy and this baby is a boy as well). Is this really proper ettiquette? I guess I always just thought it was for the first baby.
2007-10-08 04:31:44 · 26 answers · asked by ~*Mrs. GM2*~ 5 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Newborn & Baby
her kids will only be 3 years apart... they still have everything from the first one - clothes, supplies, furniture, everything - and they are financially, very well off.
2007-10-08 04:37:12 · update #1
Laurie B - see that's the thing - I'm due at the same time as my cousin (with our 2nd baby), and they're not giving me a shower - just her - and we are not financially well like they are.
2007-10-08 04:42:34 · update #2
I think it's quite tacky, especially since the second baby is going to be the same gender as her first child. Baby showers, in my eyes, are to prepare a first time Mom with all the necessities. If she's unable to afford certain items, or she gave/sold other items from her first baby, that's her fault. She should have thought towards the future.
2007-10-08 04:36:41 · answer #1 · answered by *HaPpY MaMa* 3 · 4⤊ 4⤋
In terms of etiquette it is considered improper especially when there is not a giant age gap between the babies. However, if your family wants to throw a shower, there really isn't anything wrong with it. The big sticky point would be gifts and a registry. Some attendees (especially older attendees or etiquette sticklers) will not want to give a gift, especially if they have already given one at the first shower. The family member throwing the shower might consider making the shower simply a celebration of the upcoming addition, rather than a true baby shower. If this is more about an "excuse" to have a family get together than preparing the mother to be for the new baby, that maybe the way to go in terms of proper etiquette.
2007-10-08 11:46:51 · answer #2 · answered by tnk3181979 5 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Generally people do not have a baby shower for the 2nd baby. Although I did go to a friend of mine's baby shower a few months ago. She has a 5 year old girl and just had a baby boy. She had sold all of her girls baby things, because she had given up on getting pregnant again. So, her family had her one for her 2nd pregnancy.
2007-10-08 11:36:07 · answer #3 · answered by Trini_^ 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
You are right, traditionally the baby shower is just for the first baby. Occasionally, if the babys are far apart a second would be appropriate. However, it seems that a baby shower for every baby is becoming more common.
Could your family be planning a surprise shower for you? Or maybe it's one of the cousins siblings/parents pushing for a shower for her. It doesn't seem fair for them to have a shower for her and not you, but that's just the way it goes sometimes. Since they already have everything, it may just be small gifts at their second shower. Sorry you feel left out, I know I would too.
2007-10-08 12:27:55 · answer #4 · answered by sassy sarah 4 · 3⤊ 2⤋
I know a family that has a baby shower for every baby in some way you are showing your family and friends how specials this new baby is so. Well, I don't know if it's proper ettique now about that but you can do this to say you're happy for cousin. I just went to baby shower and she was having number five and her situation is different but it's really different than your cousin's.
2007-10-08 11:43:35 · answer #5 · answered by Bondgirl 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
A friend of mine just had a second baby and didn't have one. I was very sad. I don't begrudge celebrating the birth of any child. However, I do like the suggestion of another poster to make it a theme. (Diaper shower I think it was?)
If they already have the things they need then the hosts could have a theme that asks guest to bring a small gift in that theme. OR---- Maybe the gift could be a donation to a children's charity or supplies for the local battered women's shelter ect. That way you still come together to celebrate.
2007-10-08 11:44:17 · answer #6 · answered by K.M. 2 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Creams, nappies etc are always needed and are usually the expensive things.
Bottels, teats pacifiers, can't be passed on.
It is always nice to have something new for a new baby.
Also a shawl or teaspoon set per child is nice as a memento as the child gets older.
I would throw her a baby shower just for the things that are needed - creams, nappies, few sets of new born clothing, shawl, new bottels, teats, pacifiers, special shawl, silver teaspoon/cup set, something new for mom for the hospital (night gown etc - make her feel good about her self)
I am sure she would appreciate it.
You can pass certian things to a second child (clothes, cot, pram etc.) every child is special and there are always things needed.
2007-10-08 12:02:43 · answer #7 · answered by Batfink 5 · 2⤊ 1⤋
My 1st child was a boy and I had a huge shower. 3 years later, I now have a little girl. I was not given a shower by family, but was given a small one from the girls at work, where I did receive a few small gifts. I'm not too sure if there is proper way to do baby showers or not, but my ex's sister just had her 3rd baby (all girls) and she had a baby shower. So, if you or anyone else wants to give her one, it shouldnt matter if it was her 1st, 3rd or 5th...
2007-10-08 11:37:50 · answer #8 · answered by MayMay 4 · 4⤊ 2⤋
If the baby is the same gender then she really doesn't need a new shower. A new shower is usually given only when they change genders or it has been a while since the last one. But if the fam wants to let them.
2007-10-08 11:44:34 · answer #9 · answered by crazeemama 2 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Your supposed to have a baby shower whenever some gets regnant not just the first time! Everytime! Thats proper ettiquette! Yes have the baby shower. Its not fait that the first baby gets tons of love from family & friends at a shower & the other gets non!
2007-10-08 12:32:01 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 3⤋
I had a baby shower for my 1st (son) and also for my 2nd (daughter) even though they were only 21 months apart, but that was because I was in different countries at the time of each pregnancy.
So for the first pregnancy my friends from one country hosted, and for the 2nd my friends and family from my home country hosted it.
I think it is nice to celebrate all babies - 1st or 4th, etc.
Maybe your family is planning a surprise one for you?
2007-10-08 12:36:30 · answer #11 · answered by mixedmummy 2 · 2⤊ 2⤋