He's been seeing this medical student. She'll graduate in a few months and move away. Should I confront him still? Or just let it go till she leaves him? I am afraid if i confront him, he'll get mad and act like nothing is going on between them. I asked him about it before, and he said there was nothing, but i know he's still seeing her.
2007-10-07 15:44:44 · 27 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
My god girl how can you get in the same bed with him every night knowing full well he is sleeping with another woman. I understand you are afraid of losing him but don't do this to yourself. Shame on him for taking advantage of your love and trust. Sounds like he does have you trained to where he knows you won't say anything. Show him you are stronger than he gives you credit for and tell him not ask him but tell him you know about them and if he doesn't cut it off immediately you will throw his a s s out. What do you have to lose because he probably has his mind made up anyway if he is going to go with her when she leaves. Don't assume that she will leave him when she graduates because she is most likely trying to get him to go with her. Don't stand around and let that happen fight back now while you still can. If you don't say anything to him, what will you do if he comes home and says to you,I'm leaving you in a week ? That doesn't give you much time to work on him now does it ?
2007-10-07 15:58:22 · answer #1 · answered by Teenie 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First I am sorry for this situation for you. This could have been written by a loved one of mine years ago. She picked up spouse just was not right around student (he her superior-in any other profession massive discipline would occur -this one everyone ignores the elephant in the room-amazing)
They eventually divorced and he married medical student.
Are you certain she is leaving have they already been placed in their respective new hospital jobs. In the situation I know both altered their plans to be together.
Either way you already asked him and he denied it. He can deny it until the cows come home if he wants. It could be a good thing he still denies it might be all physical-not emotional for him. He actually will not fess up unless he wants or you confront him with actual solid proof.
The question is what kind of marriage do want, and feel you deserve? Do you deserve a cheater weather it is just physical or more? Does it matter who or why?
You may not be ready to deal with all this now. My friend put it off because she was helping one she loved battle cancer, her husband took advantage of his "free" time, and although she suspected she later admitted she could not handle losing 2 people she loved at one time.
They divorced and she moved on and is now happily remarried to another man.
Best wishes
I wish you the best.
2007-10-07 16:01:29 · answer #2 · answered by Woman in Red 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think you are giving us enough information to help. If I knew my husband was continually cheating on me with the same person I would assume he was in love and I would let him the hell go but quick. If I was putting a lot of stuff together that was circumstantial I would want evident proof. I have seen people imagine things that weren't but it screwed them and their life up because of it. Don't guess if you care but I would not stick around for any man that was having an affair on me. I personally am forgiving my spouse for a fling that hurt deeply but had he carried it on for any length of time, even he knows he would be kicked to the curb, it was a close call as it is. I love him and I respect myself, I made a choice to forgive but I could not forgive if it kept going on or it was love. It is all or none for me, I love him all the way and I want it back all the way, good or bad.
2007-10-07 16:15:12 · answer #3 · answered by scsspace 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you can live your life with a cheater than ignore it but expect more cheating. If you try and confront the issue and maybe seek counseling you may fix this problem. If he thinks he can get away with it now he'll keep doing it. Do you want to spend your life always wondering and worrying? Good luck!
2007-10-07 15:50:09 · answer #4 · answered by Lordes Skye 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
So you're willing to wait around for a few more months while your husband bangs some college student, and then brings home her leftovers for you? No way. It's much better fresh, honey, not reheated.
Of course he'll get mad.. why do you care? Aren't YOU mad as hell? If not, you should be.
2007-10-07 15:52:45 · answer #5 · answered by Magaroni 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋
ahhhhhhh, when will these no good bastards know that womans intuition is almost never wrong. do you have flat out proof, i mean pt. blank if it makes you that uncomfortable that he sees her than he shouldnt be doing it.
i say confront even if an arguement occurs later cause if you let it slide now, than get ready for a long ride, i know from experiance, im still going thru the same thing. IT SUCKS
2007-10-07 16:01:07 · answer #6 · answered by itsme 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Listen to me; keep your mouth shut. Hire a private investigator. Have the cheater followed and have pictures made. Then sue him in court and take everything he owns and get a restraining order. If you are worried about him getting mad, and YOU are the victim here, you'd better grow some balls, lady, or you will be a doormat all your life. Do it.
2007-10-11 15:10:21 · answer #7 · answered by rocksister 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You'd better get tangible evidence before you confront anyone. Things are not always as they seem. But, I'd confront him immediately with evidence. He is not going to offer the truth to you because he doesn't respect you if he is in fact being unfaithful.
2007-10-07 15:55:12 · answer #8 · answered by maggieeld 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry- did you say you were worried that HE would get mad? Don't be a welcome mat! Since when does he NOT have to answer to his wife? Since when should a wife be scared to stand her ground and demand that she be treated with dignity and respect??!!
It doesn't matter that she's leaving and it will be over. He needs to know that you're on to him- because he will do it again. She leaves- he'll find someone else who will fulfill this excitement he's looking for.
Please- for your own sake- don't turn the other cheek and be blind to it- it's no healthier than what you're feeling inside from his infidelities......
good luck to you..... sincerely
2007-10-07 15:50:18 · answer #9 · answered by **leigh** 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Do you have children?
How important is your marriage?
Has he done this before?
Important questions that need to be asked.
Bottom line is he needs to be confronted. If you really want to save your marriage then you both need marriage counseling. If not, plan your escape, get your things in order, etc then drop the bomb on him.
By the way, I am a moderator at http://cheatinghusbandsforum.com and cannot do it any longer. If anyone is interested in helping out over there please, please let me know. Email me or leave a message on the board there. http://cheatinghusbandsforum.com
Good Luck!
2007-10-08 03:02:19 · answer #10 · answered by wulongworld2007 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋