My fiance and I had talked about buying and renting real estate. He bought a house and my name was supposed to be on the title, but he never put it on the title because his friends rented the house from him and he started spending all his time drinking and partying it up over there and we began argueing and broke up and then he slept with a chick that is friends with the people over there, then we got back together again and I was hoping things would change. Anyhow, I then bought a house to rent out. I asked him to go home shopping with me but he would rather drink and party. So I bought a house without him to rent out to others. It was like pulling teeth to get him to help me renovate the house, yet he'll do anyting for his rental. He says it's not his so he doesn't care. I guess I figured our dream of buying and renting real estate as a couple was still alive through it all, and all he he wants to do is party w/freinds. Sad. Why? What happened? I feel ditched for his drinking buds.
2007-10-07 09:53:15 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
His behavior is telling you he's not ready to commit. End it and move on. You will be much happier in the long run.
2007-10-07 09:56:48 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
I've been to a number of these after parties in the hotel room and have to say, from the guest's perspective, it's a great time. I find this is when you really start reflecting on old times, getting into deep conversations and really enjoy yourself and let loose. The mood really changes when it's just you and your old friends, and you take away the family and in-laws. The bride and groom, while tired like everyone else, seem to enjoy themselves too. Neither of you is right or wrong, you just want different things. You need to respect each other, listen to one another, give up the namecalling, see each other's point of views, and come to a compromise. It will be good practice for married life. You might consider leaving the decision until your wedding reception when you know how you are feeling, and if you're too tired or not. You don't want to make the decision now and have regrets one way or the other, since you really won't know how you feel when the time comes. This type of party can certainly be impromptu.
2016-05-18 02:04:35 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Open your eyes and SEE what he is doing..Actions speak louder than words!
This guy is immature and is not ready to give up his bachelorhood...and he is showing you this by drinking and partying without you.
The fact he already cheated on you -and you forgave him and got back together- has also told him that you will act the same way in the future, when he does it again. So he's not worried because he thinks you'll never have the guts to leave. You're teaching him it's OK to treat you badly...and that is not healthy.
Marrying this guy sounds like a recipe for a disaster...
So BE SMART and walk away now! Don't waste any more time with him because his priorities are not the same as yours. Sorry to be so blunt- but sometimes truth hurts...
Good luck and take care of yourself.-
RESPECT and LOVE yourself... before you can ask others to do the same for you. Ask God to help you and to give you the strength you need to move on without him. Give a nice, decent guy a chance!
2007-10-07 11:58:21 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have been ditched so make sure that he knows it is over or when you start to be successful at the real estate game he will be back and expect you to take him back and act as if everything is fine. You don't need him to be there as you buy and rent out real estate and as you grow more successful, you will find a male counterpart perhaps who will also be successful along and make a fine couple.
2007-10-07 10:03:57 · answer #4 · answered by Al B 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is only commitment is to himself, that is obvious when your name was not on the title of his house. He is not serious about marrying you, and if you don't end the engagement soon, he will.
Good on you for going ahead with your own purchase. Don't involve him in the house, if he wants to party with his 'friends', let him. The fact that he doesn't care about the house because it isn't 'his' means he doesn't see you guys sharing things in the future. After all, if he was serious about you, he would view this house as an investment in a mutual future, but he doesn't.
Please, be strong and get out of it before he totally tramples on you. Be the one to make the decision and let him be the loser.
2007-10-07 11:18:52 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Why is it that you're thinking things will change the 2nd time around? You can't change him. He should WANT to be with you, not you asking and begging him to chase the dream you once shared together. Move on ... sounds like you have your head together as far as what you're pursuing financially. It's not easy, since it sounds like you're hoping things will change and you obviously care about him. You deserve more ... and should settle for nothing less. He's obviously not ready to be a grown up.
2007-10-07 10:06:06 · answer #6 · answered by Pisces Chicka 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I agree with the first comment. This guy has changed his mind about how far he wants to commit to the relationship.
The reason he's not interested is probably because he's unsure of what he wants.
This is not the type of person you want to be tied down to, anyway! You deserve better...And he's showing his true colors.
I would break up with him. Let him know that you can't be with a person who isn't wanting the same things.
2007-10-07 10:00:57 · answer #7 · answered by darkening_hope 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like your boyfriend got a MAJOR case of "cold feet".
I'd be seriously reconsidering the options, if I were you, in the matter of going into any kind of deal with him...from investments to more emotional committment.
You deserve better! Hope he shapes up, or that you find the better you deserve.
2007-10-07 10:11:19 · answer #8 · answered by bitadkins 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sorry honey but you have been ditched for his drinking buddies. You have now realised that he has not matured and grown into the responsible "I want to spend the rest of my life with this man". Get rid of him before he starts costing you financially.
2007-10-07 09:58:25 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
This sounds like a clear case of alcohol abuse and possibly addiction. Was he earnestly happy to go through with getting married? Maybe he is just insincere and really just wants to remain single and free from responsibilities.
2007-10-07 09:57:45 · answer #10 · answered by Koven H 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Since you've been having issues with him for going on a year, you really ought to ask yourself if this is someone you want to spend the rest of your life with.
Marriage is not going to "magically fix" anything.
2007-10-07 10:11:42 · answer #11 · answered by Nandina (Bunny Slipper Goddess) 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋