you feel?
2007-10-07 03:14:47 · 10 answers · asked by LEMON the good life 7 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Polls & Surveys
I'm going through this now. I've babysat my niece every single weekend for the past 6 years, a service that requires a 2-hour round trip on my part, and I never charged a dime. Somewhere along the line, my generosity in babysitting at least 50 weekends a year became a demand for them, and I crossed the line between being a loving aunt and a unpaid servant. I was asked at the last minute to take a week off work to shuttle my niece to and fro camp, and I couldn't do it and keep my job. They got abusive with me for "betraying them" and not loving my niece, even though there was no emergency involved.
How do you deal with such injustice and selfishness? I thought they were kidding at first, then I wondered if they were simply delusional. Finally I was extremely wounded, felt utterly dismissed, lost all trust in them, and got enraged at their monumental selfishness & ingratitude.
The hardest part is letting go of the idea that I can change them or change their behavior. It has been a rough 2 months of examining myself, delineating my own boundaries, being calm and consistent every time they send an abusive email or voicemail. You'll need to take advantage of every resource - if you have affordable counseling, use it. If you have family and/or friends with sympathetic ears, talk to them. If you have a diary, scrawl 500 pages worth of hurt and rage. If you are athletic, exhaust yourself in exercise.
It's really hard to let go of this hurt, and the d@mnable part is that you go on hurting long after the person who did this to you stops thinking about what they did. It is very unfair, but the "crappee" is often in more turmoil than the "crapper". It will be hard to get over a betrayal when the person who did it may never own up to their accountability. It's messy, but you have to be brutally honest with yourself in terms of what you feel, you need to draw forth the pain so that it doesn't poison your life.
2007-10-07 03:44:33 · answer #1 · answered by Buttercup 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
At first, I'd feel like crap and then sad and then I spend some time alone thinking and writing about it and then I can start the healing process and I re-affirm that I won't let people like that get me down anymore.
2007-10-07 08:16:12 · answer #2 · answered by Ohioguy95 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
VERY unappreciated. But it just shows how ungreatful some people are, and just think and care about themselves. If this has happened to you, don't stress about it. You have done all you can, YOU know that you are a good person, and that is all that matters.
2007-10-07 03:20:25 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
used
2007-10-07 03:19:31 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm in that boat right now. I stay in that boat. The only thing that helps me is God knowing what I did to help. He also knows what the other person did, & vengeance is His, not mine. We are to receive double for our trouble. Putting it in the Lord's hands is my only answer.
2007-10-07 03:46:13 · answer #5 · answered by rat racer 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I feel like that's the last thing I will do for them.
2007-10-07 03:19:14 · answer #6 · answered by Heyitsme 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
i feel sad, it happened to me several times. but i regard them as losers because they have never master the art of "loving people for what they are".
2007-10-07 03:24:19 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I dont bother with them anymore. They are not worth my time.
2007-10-07 07:23:04 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
feel dumb and make sure I'm not so nice the next time.
2007-10-07 03:18:50 · answer #9 · answered by Yummy♥Mummy 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
i feel like they are ignorant.
i sit back and wait cos i know they will need me someday!
2007-10-07 03:18:56 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋