My 2mo. daughter father and I need to part ways,after being together/knowing each other for about 5yrs off/in. As he does not give me what I need: quality time and does not provide for me.
His idea of quality time is just being in my breathing space playing playstation and going food shopping (he has to eat) or picking up things for the baby.
Yes, I communicated to him several different times what I needed in a relationship and he did the opposite. I stayed hoping things will get better. Please understand I am not a ******, I find its a waste of time once two adults have come to a resolution. Now I am looking to resolve the issue by letting it go. I am tired!!!
Ok, with that being said, I am looking for advice on what is a fair visitation schedule for him to see his child? Since he lives 2hrs away.
2007-10-07 00:09:42 · 7 answers · asked by sassyme... 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Newborn & Baby
if you feel your child is safe with him then he should have the child every weekend or every other weekend remember this is his child to. it takes 2 people to make this child or anychild, and the child will need to know what kind of role that it's daddy plays in her life, ask him what he thinks and go with it, unless he thinks you should have visits? try to be reasonable and take his fellings into concideration, how would you feel if it was you needing the visits? good luck and best wishs get some alone time during visits to spend time taking care of you.. thats important!..................ok people... first this is THEIR child not his or hers it's theirs.....it doesn't matter if he is broke and has no money he should still be able to see his child, as for a supervised visit this dad has been with her taking care of this child, he knows how to, stop feeding negative energy of your bad experiences into this womans head... it's not like he was abusive or unable to parent, he just didn't fill her needs as a woman, end of story... go with your gut girl and do whats right. hope this helps.
2007-10-07 02:28:14 · answer #1 · answered by jittarbug 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You sound like a wise young woman. Far too many of us hold onto a relationship that has run its course for one reason or another. While ideally having two parents together in the home is best, ideals sometimes must give way to reality, particularly when a child is involved. I commend you on your honesty with yourself.
At 2mos. your daughter needs her mother with her. If your ex is serious about seeing her he will understand that. I would suggest perhaps 4-5 hours on a Saturday or Sunday every second weekend. Also have it understood that he must do the traveling. It would be totally unfair and unwise to pack up and drive a total of 4 hrs for a few hours of visitation. He on the other hand has no such considerations and as such should assume that responsibility. Unless you are breastfeeding you do not necessarily have to be there but some other person should be. The other person should have experience with infants and be within your family structure (as in your mother, father, bro,sis, etc.) someone you trust completely to watch out for the welfare of this baby. I am not suggesting your ex would intentionally harm his own child, but with no experience with an infant this would help give him support as well. I am sure he has been around the baby and perhaps even cared for her alone. If this is the case and you trust him and have no qualms about it - it is of course your decision to make. You, as custodial parent should set down all ground rules on paper and have him sign them. If you have to go to court to receive child support have visitation decided as well. This is in the best interest of your child and not an act of revenge or anymosity
As your daughter grows visitation rights can be adjusted accordingly.
My dear - being a single parent is one of the most difficult things you will ever do. It is also the most rewarding, most loving, most wonderful times of your life. Please enjoy her every moment. The time will come all too soon when you will yearn to hold that tiny hand in yours once more, but, by then her hand will match or exceed yours. I wish you so much joy, love, tenderness, all the emotions that will come. Even the tears will make memories.
God bless and keep you and your daughter and God bless her father as well. I pray he realizes the treasure he has been blessed with. (I include you in the treasure chest)
fishergirl.
2007-10-07 02:26:57 · answer #2 · answered by fishergirl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
depending on whether you are breastfeeding at the moment? If yes then he can come to you when ever he likes, or whenever is appropriate. If you aren't breastfeeding then depending on if he wants days and nights, etc. You may need to discuss this with him and find out how much he would like to be involved. You need to extend an honest offer of visitation to him to make it all amicable, but it is all hard to say not knowing how much he wants to be involved.
I probably didn't help, but maybe just a little? Good luck Hun.
2007-10-07 00:44:35 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
i'm so sorry to your loss. It would desire to be a undesirable feeling to lose a baby, i won't be able to even start to think of the discomfort you're feeling. i think of out of those 3, As I Lay Me Down is the final selection. Ut is approximately loss of existence, and being so close that loss of existence is not any impediment. i would not propose the different 2 even with the undeniable fact that. different songs that are stable are: a million. One candy Day - Mariah Carey/Boyz 2 adult males. 2. You enhance Me Up - Westlife. 3. Tears in Heaven - Eric Clapton.
2016-10-10 11:23:06 · answer #4 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well I was breastfeeding....so fair visitation was when ever he wants to come visit with her. Now that she's 7 months its when ever he wants to visit with her or do something fun with us like the zoo, the aquarium, the park.
In time I may let her go stay with him....but until he's around more to learn her routine and feeding schedule she won't be spending time w/out me around.
2007-10-07 01:39:28 · answer #5 · answered by gypsy g 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
If he is a "Good" father, Let him see/have her as much as he is willing/able. this is all contingent upon his proper care of her, and staying current on his child support payments ect..
2007-10-07 00:17:55 · answer #6 · answered by Millwood 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As much as he can handle. To be honest, you'll be lucky if he ever wants to see his daughter at all the way you describe him. Good Luck!
2007-10-07 00:30:07 · answer #7 · answered by Andrea 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋