My husband made a comment earlier today and yesterday about my Questions and Answers being set to private on Yahoo Answers. Apparently he tried to search for my questions but he couldn't access anything. He rarely looks on Yahoo Answers but he was trying to snoop and see what I ask and answer to on here.
I mainly set my Questions and Answers private because sometimes people have a tendancy to bring up something in a question you answered three weeks ago in a question that you asked today. Also, because I have asked many questions about our marriage and things pertaining to him, I wouldn't want him to read any of that. It's not that I'm asking anything that he doesn't know about. It's just he would get all bent out of shape about the way I'm asking something.
Do you think he has a right to be mad at me? It's almost like he wanted me to say "Here, look at my Questions and Answers.". I don't have anything to hide. But I feel he shouldn't care what I ask on here.
2007-10-06 14:30:08 · 22 answers · asked by Hoping he will bless me with #1 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
As long as I am not cheating or doing anything wrong then why should he care? It's sort of a hobby, right?
2007-10-06 14:30:40 · update #1
I think he's being insecure and petty. I don't have my Q&A's private, but I'm lucky he has no interest in what I ask and answer. I wouldn't want him reading my things either, and I'm not doing anything wrong. However, I frequently answer questions people have about alcoholism or drug addiction, because of my experience with him. I know it would bother him if he knew I was discussing such matters with others, since he would rather keep his problem in the closet. I think that if I can help someone, then my hardships haven't been completely in vain.
2007-10-06 15:46:45 · answer #1 · answered by Miami Lilly 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
There are two answers to this question but I am going to start with: No, he should not be angry that you have your Q & As set to private. I mean, that is your choice, and if he wants to see them (and not just snoop), he should ask you outright.
The second answer to the question has to do with what you said, "I don't have anything to hide." Well, the truth is that you already said you do have something to hide. You don't want him to know the wording or the way that you are asking questions ... that sounds like you do want to hide something from him. He has a right to be curious, especially about things that you do on-line.
The truth is, this isn't just a way to spend some time online. It is also a forum, where many people make friends, chat, get answers to serious questions, and sometimes form beliefs based on things they learn/read. Many relationships are started and ended online. From family experience I can tell you that what you do online is just as important to who you are than what you do in real life. My sister was married for almost a year when she found out that her husband had cheated on her before their marriage. She knew about one time that he cheated with her best friend, but she forgave him. Then she finds out about this second deceit. Well, she got online and asked some people what they thought. Someone she chatted with gave an answer that she connected with and she started chatting with him more often. Six months later her husband has turned himself around completely, talked to his religious leader and started going to counselling. He wanted her to come, but she didn't think it was her problem (just his). He wanted to keep trying and make their marriage work, but finally she refused. She said that she couldn't forgive him, but the real reason was because she had developed such a close bond with the online guy that she didn't want hubby anymore. She didn't even come home to her family from CA before running straight to Chicago to spend some time with Mr. Online. Ultimately, she cheated too, because she put so much of herself into her relationship with Mr. Online that she didn't have anything left to put into her marriage.
Marriage is a partnership and a union of two people. You shouldn't have anything that you say online that you think would make your husband mad, because that's just being deceitful when you hide it from him. And your relationship should be communicative enough that no matter what you say online, you've already said it all to him. It takes work, and it means that no online relationship should be more important than your marriage. I know that was a long answer. But I've always felt strongly about marriage and honesty. :)
2007-10-06 14:49:12 · answer #2 · answered by Manda B 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
it is type of peculiar to be certain this question immediately. I only edited my Profile to contain this- approximately me: to those who could ask your self. i'm a private man or woman in existence. Like my very very own residence the place I purely invite acquaintances, I shop my Q&A's open purely to my acquaintances right here. in case you detect my acquaintances right here suspicious, you have a situation. not certainly one of my making. be happy to e mail in case you have a question. i will answer it while i'm attainable and if i'm waiting to. As replaced into stated above, there are some purchasers who will circulate via your data to record, however if or not they are deserved or not, just to be advise and petty. i'm preserving that folder closed.
2016-10-06 05:41:28 · answer #3 · answered by dorthy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I can see why he'd be pissed, he probably does think you are consorting with someone else even if you're not. Then again I also see why you're being secretive in your Q&As, I wouldn't want my other half to find out what I've been asking advise on, even if it's for the betterment of "your" relationship. Sounds to me like your husband, like so many husbands, has "little man" syndrome. He's feeling inadequate already and your keeping secrets from him is making it worse, so tread lightly and try not to inflame the situation any further. Maybe lay off the answers for awhile, I know, it's sooooo addictive.
2007-10-06 14:53:51 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
This may be the only outlet you have, so NO don't let him read your personal comments and questions. Let Mr. Paranoia keep wondering what you're saying on YA. It sounds so silly to me. This is not a chat room. It's a question and answer forum. Would he rather you confide in another person about your problems or strangers on the net?
2007-10-06 14:49:48 · answer #5 · answered by peggy 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Yes everyone has a right to be mad about a situation that someone else may not see the same way.
I agree with you though. These are YOUR personal choices and if you have nothing to feel guilty about then let him cool off.
2007-10-06 14:41:42 · answer #6 · answered by ? 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Wrong , its not a hobby , and hiding it from him is only feeding his insecurity , no matter the problems in your marriage keeping things locked from him is not a good idea , show him the questions you've asked and explain why they were asked , obviously you have issues that need sorting and instead of discussing it with him after getting the advice here your keeping it locked up and 1 day you will implode.
I am seperated from my husband but he has read every question I have asked here and we have discussed it , he knows I wont take him back but we're capable even being seperated of discussing without worrying about how he will react to my issues, your marriage should be the same if not more if you are not planning on leaving him.
Its about respect , love and trust and if you dont trust him enough to speak to him about what you ask then do you really have a solid based stable marriage?.
2007-10-06 14:38:30 · answer #7 · answered by JadeyOz 5 · 1⤊ 4⤋
Guys are just like that! They want to know every thing your doing, but if it were the othe way around, they would blow up and say you dont trust him. Just keep your cool and keep your foot down! You dont need to let him see you questions and Answers! Obvioiusly you come up on here for advice, and hhmmm sometimes its pertaining to him. Therefore I say, Just let him know that you arent going to give in. He needs to get over it!
He has a right to be concerned, but not mad. Have you ever given him a reason to feel that you might be doing something behind his back? Maybe hes just insecure, but thats not your problem! He has to understand you are his WIFE, and OBVIOUSLY, you want and love him!!!
2007-10-06 14:38:34 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
This has become sort of a new hobby for me relaying answers to questions but I honestly don't think that there's anything wrong with it! But I know and you know that men take anything hidden personal and question everything in there relationship that is! Regardless to him thinking that your cheating or anything else for that matter!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! So at this point just feel him out with his total thoughts of this question you ask and play off of that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2007-10-06 15:51:40 · answer #9 · answered by rita_hiemy 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Open it up, and let him read it. I know it easy to say, but whatever issues you have with your husband, you should discuss it with him. And since it something he already knows, it not a big deal. I think he is getting mad about nothing, But, men are funny. he may feel his privacy or his business is being put there without his knowledge.
2007-10-06 15:09:17 · answer #10 · answered by lynnn30 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋